Bored with kids

Hi girls,

Sounds horrible but I am so bored at being SAHM. Every day is the same old thing and the same time.

Does it get better as they grow older?

What do you do everyday alone with kids?

Feeling a bit down and would appreciate any response.

Thanks

 

I totally understand where you're coming from! Day after day can get into a rut and the phrase 'stultifying sameness' comes to mind. I try to take them out to a restaurant or to the mall or different parks. I vary their food a lot, like yesterday they had falafel for the first time, just to give me something different. There's also the local library or playdates. I also tend to buy them new books or toys when I'm bored.

 

I hear ya. It's raining AGAIN today so another day of being indoors. :headbang: Lately my one son will pitch a fit when I try to put him in the seat of the grocery cart. My other son has boycotted the stroller (hence the shopping cart). I have to listen to him scream for a good 5 minutes before he realizes he's staying put and can't walk all the while I have to deal with the disapproving looks from strangers. So even going to the store seems to be more of a hassle lately.

There are some days like today I let them watch Sprout TV. It's the only thing that keeps them quiet and happy.

On nice days we go to the park or I'll try and find a place we've never been to before. Our yard in fenced so I can let them run around and play and not have to worry.

At least it's summer. I was going :crazy: this past winter.

 

Being a SAHD I find a lot of stuff to do. You can always take them out for walks or go for a drive even do a baby pool. I live in the middle of no way and I can always find something to do. I love getting out of the house and just walking with my twinkies. Another suggestion would be to join some kind of mom club. There is nothing here for me because I am a SAHD but there are always plenty of stuff to do. You just have to expand your options.

 

I too, really understand how you feel. From the get go I was always saying, "I love my kids but childcare is mind numbingly BORING!"

I work from home, but things have been much quieter business-wise since the twins came along, so I'm more of SAHM these days. Really, becoming a parent I suddenly understood why I saw so many mothers going out for walks with their babies. I take the boys out for walks at least once a day and try to spice it up for myself by varying the route. It does get better when they are older because they can do more and they respond to you more. I can point out birds and trees and talk about the flowers and I can see them looking interested and occasionally trying out a word or two. I'm looking forward to the days when I can try them out with play doh and crayons etc (also imagining the potential headaches).

I do also think an advantage with twins is that a good part of the time they keep each other company so I can escape into another room to do a little something for myself - or clean a few dishes - whatever.

We have a fenced in back yard so with the good weather they can play there. And I do often give them TV time to give myself a break.

Are there any mother/baby/toddler groups you can go to? There are some locally here and I myself need to make more of an effort to go and get to know people. There's also a children's thing on at the local library once a week which is good to go to, although keeping control of both boys can be a bit crazy.

My husband has been away on business for a few days and today, Day 3 on my own, I was on the edge of stir crazy, so I do really know how you feel. I do think it will get better for you as they get older. But there will be days when you are bored, but you know what? You do get through them and suddenly it's bed time and bath time and they are asleep for the night and you can do things for yourself. And usually I say to myself, if boredom is the worst of bringing up twins, that's not too bad a complaint. It helps me anyway....

 

My husband and I refer to my days as Groundhog Day. Life as a SAHM has been extremely difficult to adjust to, especially if you had an enjoyable, challenging, and interesting job like I did. However, I get through each day by looking forward to something after they go to bed.

I also go to a local early years centre once a week. I noticed you are from Ontario so you can access this resource. Here is the link:
http://www.children.gov.on.ca/htdocs/English/topics/earlychildhood/oeyc/index.aspx
My local centre is amazing.

One day a week I run some sort of errand. Sometimes I make up an errand to do just to get out of the house. The park, a splash pad, a walk, or a drive-thru Tim Horton's can turn the mood around and break up the monotony. Getting out of the house makes a large difference in how our day goes.

 

I get in this type of mood too. The best thing I have done is made sure I have plans three days a week with other people. Twin play group, family, local play group, church play group and old college friend play group. The other two days we have to leave the house once. Usually it's an errand. Sometimes one I can walk to, sometimes one we will drive to. I am a homebody and really had no problem with bed rest for three months, never leaving the house except for the Dr. But I have found telling my boys to get down from the standing on the oven pull out drawer for the tenth time in one day, sort of drives me to find a new environment. Good luck!

 

I find it boring at times, too. I love my kids and they can be soooo sweet. But I don't enjoy housekeeping or the day to day drudgery. I miss my career, too. But I want to stay home for now and make it work.

I always go out once a day. We have a regular play date once a week and a mother's morning out program once a week. Lately, I've been trying to go out twice a day. It makes the day go much faster and it is a great change of pace. Even if I'm in a bad mood, I feel much better when I get some fresh air and say "hi" to a few strangers. I bought a used running stroller and we are running/walking on the local bike trail two or three mornings a week. There are lots of people out walking their dogs and running. It's good for sightseeing. Then we stop at the local ballpark that is enclosed. They can run for a long time and love it. We also have a neighborhood park, and usually go there 2-3 times a week. It's small, but enclosed. We don't have a yard, so I need to take them out to burn off more energy. If I stay home, I look at the clock too often and count the hours until nap time or bedtime. Time just drags along. It's not a great way to spend the day! HTH a little.

 

It's not horrible at all. There are days where I feel very bored and like we do the same thing daily!
I think it does get better as they get older because they are more willing to entertain themselves. I can go places with them by myself for longer stretches of time with them listening and not having meltdowns.
I try to vary our activities: I go to Storytime at Barnes and Noble, joined a moms group on meetup.com and try to find activities for the kids and I to do through the group, now that the weather is nicer I try to get them out for walks or to the playground, they color, we read together, I usually let them watch PBS kids shows and Nick Jr.

 

Girls,

Thank you so so much for sharing all your stories. Makes me feel "normal".

I too love my kids to death and we tried for 2 years and 5 IVF cycles to conceive them, but I never expected to be so alone. I guess because my mom passed away and my father & sister live far, I don't have that much family support.

Thanks very much for your suggestions. I will try to schedule to get out more often, find play groups and go to local centers. My daughter started to walk so it is bit easier to entertain her.

 

It took us 10 years to have our boys. So they are very precious and I am blessed to stay at home taking care of them. But when I started having some spare time, I started searching for work from home jobs and started working virtually. so while I am blessed being a SAHM, I am more happy now being a WAHM i.e.(work at home mum).

 

Even with mine at 2.5 you can get into a rut. I have found that having a bit of a schedule where on Mondays is a day-off and P.J. day, Tuesday was a playgroup, Wednesday.... blah blah. Having a singleton mom is great too and can really help. See if someone is interested in meeting somewhere every week like a playcentre. Even when your kids are at a difficult stage -- keep going to something and it might only be a week or so and they might get out of it (eg. a clingy stage)

Take some time for you. I love twinstuff for that reason, it helps me to communicate when I have the chance to. Sometimes you get out of the house and it seems a waste because they are all crying, etc but then on those days you just say "there I did it we got out".

Plan plan plan ....

Heather

 

I also understand how you feel. I am having the "walls are closing in" feeling right now as a matter of fact. We do the same things everyday, and since I am pregnant again it makes even harder for me to go do things because of my non-existent energy level. Plus we live in the south and it is so freakishly hot outside already I can barely stand it for more than about 10-15 minutes until it is five or later. I am amazed at you moms that take your kids to the park.....I could never do it with my two. They are hard enough to watch in our own fenced in backyard. I live where I know no other mothers and all of my friends that have kids live at least an hour or more away. My mom died three weeks before I found out I was pregnant, my dad, his girlfriend, and my inlaws all live an hour away. Now that we have hit summer my dad his lady play golf almost every day, my MIL travels constantly (right now she is in Europe for a month), and my FIL works all the time. So it is pretty much me alone until the hubs comes home in the afternoon. We are trying to move to the same town with the rest of the family....especially since there is a new baby coming in Novemeber. Until then I rely on facebook, phone conversations, and the one day a week I go to see the family to get me through.