biting question

What do you do when it's someone else's child that keeps biting yours? It's a family member & the mom was talking to me about how frustrating it is for her b/c she bites all the time. Just today, we had a yard sale & she bit one of the ladies little girl & then my little girl on the way home....hard enough to leave a pretty good mark. She's 18 mos, and understands the concept of a time out really well, but it just isn't working for the biting. I feel bad b/c I don't want to be bossy & tell my sil what to do (but I know she's looking for answers), it's just that my poor babies are getting bit all the time!

Any suggestions?

 

We had a biting problem with Mimi and the ONLY thing that worked was to bite her back. I tried time-out, taking toys away, pops on the diaper and nothing work. I finally bit her back just enough for it to hurt her a little, but not leave a mark, and she hasn't done it again since. I cried like a baby for hurting her, but it was the only thing I could think of at the time to get her to stop and it worked. I'm not saying you should tell your sil to bite her back, just stating what finally worked for us. She was biting Braeden so bad that she almost drew blood on his back one time and left a horrible bruise.

 

At 18 months, biting is, unfortunately, developmentally normal. I would check to see if she is getting teeth--that always makes it worse. Really, the only thing to do is be supervigillant, and redirect before she can bite. With Jon, we would tell him--no bite, kiss. It gave him an acceptable alternative. Another think to look at is her speech development, many times biting, expecially at a young age is due to the inability to communicate. Finally, keep in mind, that while she may go into time out at 18 months, she is really too young to "get" long term cause/effect which is why it may stop a behavior momentarily, but you don't see any long term change.

 

QUOTE(sharongl @ May 7 2007, 10:56 AM) [snapback]245938[/snapback]
Another think to look at is her speech development, many times biting, expecially at a young age is due to the inability to communicate.


Actually, she is really ahead for speech. She just had her checkup & was about the level of a 2 year old for speech.....2 word sentences, too. She's really smart. I didn't know that about the teething thing, though; thanks!

 

when i was first dealing w/ R biting, someone told me that the underdog is usually the one who is biting. and that was the case here. R is the underdog and it's a way to control her world.

now i have to deal with the "play biting" R will ASK A to bite her hand, finger, whatever like a play sorta thing. it's wierd. A doesn't hurt her either. but then when R wants to bite back, she will leave a mark --- so redirecting, simple NO, replacing it with a teething toy and saying bite this, not your sister,

 

QUOTE(p31heather @ May 8 2007, 03:15 AM) [snapback]246928[/snapback]
it's a way to control her world


interesting.....she does have 4 older brothers & sisters! I was talking to a friend of mine today who runs a daycare & she agreed with the teething. She also reminded me that just b/c they have a large vocabulary doesn't always mean they can communicate as well as they want to. I liked the saying she uses with her kids, "Teeth are not for biting, they're for eating." Thanks everyone!