Big kid beds or not...

I was told by the director that came out to screen Zoe for speech that I need to move them to seperate rooms by the time they are three. She said that they need their own space to exert their independence...now if they were same sex I doubt she would be saying this. So I want to know what you all think. Do they really need to be in seperate rooms. Is it hurting anything to let them share a room?
TIA

 

I've never heard of this. They have tons of other opportunities to develop their independence. The girls' pedi never mentioned separating them. They've always shared a room and will have to unless we move. We have no room here to separate them.

 

I guess I'd want to see some research to back that up. I try to treat my kids like individuals, but I also try to take into consideration the bond that they have formed. If they are happy, sleeping well and enjoy being with each other, I wouldn't be so quick to split them up. Does your DD rely heavily on your DS? Other than this opinion, did the director have any reasoning or any experience to explain her suggestion?

We're planning to keep our b/g twins together for as long as they want to share a room. I've never heard anything about sharing a room hindering their independence. I'll be interested in the other responses you get.

-Catherine

 

K&K still share a room and they will as long as we live here since it is a 2 bedroom apartment. I have lived here for 11 years and I live rent free so I don't see us going anywhere anytime soon! I don't think K&K have any issues with their independence. Of course they love to play together but they also love to play alone, I think they have the perfect mix. I don't think where they sleep really matters but at this age this is all they really do in there, maybe she means a place for them to call their own?

 

The director of what???? If they need to be separated, then I am in trouble! I have been keeping mine together and the pedi hasn't ever even asked about it! :umm:

 

It is the state run program for Georgia...I can't remember the name. She came out to evaluate Zoe for speech and determined that she didn't qualify. AS we were talking I mentioned that they still share a room and that is when she went into this big thing about how by the age of three I need to seperate them and absolutely no later than age four...now my thinking is that if they were same sex twins she wouldn't be saying this at all, because how many people have same sex siblings share a room for convience. She provided no theory or research, just her opinion. My children are independent and don't rely on each other for everything. Drew will play with trains and cars for ever on his own and Zoe will do her own thing. They love each other, but are perfectly happy on their own also. So I was wondering what everyone else thought.

 

Phooey. I think that is just silly. But FWIW, mine are separated.

Just think of all the children from cultures across this world, across all generations, that have shared rooms for years.

 

Um, I am not so ure about that statement... :umm: But mine share a room and I will continue to have them share. Even if I wanted to separat them at this point- I think they would still end up together in 1 room!!

 

Mine will share a room until they ask to be separated. I have a feeling this person was just uncomfortable with boys/girls sharing. My boys have platform beds with drawers and headboard cubbies, so they have space for some of their personal things. I don't see anything wrong with kids sharing a room--that is more common than not.

 

im in a situation where i dont have a choice.. 2.5 ds and 1.5 dd/ds

my older son goes to bed half an hour after teh little ones..

that being said.. the little ones get closed in the back.. in the dark in their cribs. and just chat..

i have no idea what i would do.. but i have a feeling its a line of bs.. they are brother and sister..

i wouldnt hold to mcuh stock in what he said..

 

Mine share a room as well and other than not really napping (that's another saga) they are fine! I shared a room with my twin sister until we went away to college and my b/g twin siblings shared until kindergarten and they are fine!

 

What a bunch of hooey! I was going to say the same thing as Kate -- think of all the people all over the world since the beginning of time who've shared a sleeping space! I think there are many many MANY more important things to developing independence than where a child sleeps. I also agree with you and some PP that IMHO she's probably just uncomfortable about opposite sex sharing and wouldn't have said a word if they were same sex.

 

I think she is giving you her opinion as fact. When we move next summer, all three of our kids will be sharing a room because we'll need the 3rd room for an office and homeschooling. I don't think any of them are going to be have problems with independence because they share a room. Like Kate said, did families who lived in one room houses have kids with independence problems?

 

I think it's a bunch of hooey too. Ainsley has been in EI since two months old and not once has anyone asked about their sleeping arrangements.

 

I haven't heard that per se, but mine are the same sex and they have different rooms.
I treat them like brothers and not twins so much, and if they were different ages, they'd have separate rooms anyhow.
Follow your heart.