Bedtime is driving me nuts!

From the moment we head into their room to go to bed the struggle begins it seems like lately. It starts with Sam getting into Nicholas's bed which upsets Nicholas. Then if Sam turns off the light and shuts the door...then Nicholas wants to turn off the light and shut the door too. It's then a battle over who gets to pick the story that we tell (they aren't actual books but stories that I say out loud to them) and then how many we tell. After the stories...then they might need a drink. Then they remember a particular stuffed animal that they just HAVE to have....which might take us several minutes to hunt for in their room. Finally our prayers are even a struggle. They used to repeat the prayer after me really nicely...but now they will stall...say "I don't know the next part"....but if I just finish it without them they just cry and whine. I've tried being patient and calm and other times I just get mad. I can't seem to figure out a way to make our bedtime routine not be a power struggle. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated! I feel at my wits end!

 

Here are the couple of things I do, maybe they will help.

We often get ready 15-30 min early and if they do it nicely then they can play something quiet for 10 min as a reward, they love it. Often one reminder helps get back on track.

I would set a schedule/routine for who gets to do what so they can know what is suppossed to happen, it helps mine tons to plan ahead of who will do what.

If you have a list of what to do in what order it helps us 1-change 2-brush teeth 3-drink 4-read 5-prayers 6-call dad(working nights now) 7- turn on music and lights off

We also have the rule that blankets/snugglies they sleep with stay in bed at all time, then they aren't looking for them at bedtime. So if they want to sleep with their bears, they stay in bed and aren't played with other times.

Bedtimes are always hard and kind of go in cycles at our house. Hope yours gets better soon.

 

No advice from me since we are having bedtime battles here too. But just wanted to offer :hug:

 

Thanks for the support and advice! I'm hoping this is just a phase we are going through! One thing I think I am going to do differently tonight is have them make sure everything is in their bed that they need (blanket, favorite animals) before we turn off the light. I also think starting bedtime a little earlier will help too. It's all a work in progress! Thanks again for reading and for your advice/support!

 

We're having bedtime battles too. If I have to hear "I'm not tired" and "I don't want to go to bed" one more time I'm going to lose it! :gah: Now over the past week one dd is awake at least an hour after lights are out gabbing to her dolls and stuffed animals. I've tried taking things away but that doesn't help.

I have no real advice to give, just want to let you know you're not alone. I hope this passes soon! :hug:

 

I think the key is to not give in to them. With mine, I would read two stories - one I would read from 'J's bed the next one from 'T's bed. Then I'd sing a series of 4 songs, but I'd do 2 sets, one sitting on each bed. They used to do the 'I need my ____ stuffed animal' or whatever. I got to the point that I would tell them , "Okay, mommy will go look for it - you guys stay here." But I'd make sure to turn their music on before I left and most of the time, they'd be knocked out within 5 minutes. Eventually they stopped asking.

As for the lights/doors - I'd probably just split it up. One night let Nicholas turn off the light and Sam shut the door. The next night switch it up, etc... That's worked in our house too for different things. Our huge fight used to be carseats and who sat where (despite the carseats being identical) so we'd have to tell them "Okay, 'J' you can sit here on the way TO daycare but 'T' gets to sit here on the way home tonite" any fussing that incurred later in the day was just ignored.

Good luck!