Bedtime Battle...every.single.night.

It used to be a cakewalk getting my kids to bed. They know their routine and they settled right into it. Until recently...in the last few weeks (since turning 4 I suppose) my son is flatout refusing to get in bed every night. This is after Daddy has come home and played/read/engaged with him for a good amount of time, teeth brushed, story, etc...and I know the child is wiped out. He starts whining and running away from us, crying, screaming etc... Then when he is finally settled, he comes out again, sweetly saying he loves us, and ends up staying up later than usual (DD on the other hand falls asleep quickly most nights and doesn't fight us). I would really like to know what you all do with your kids if/when they challenge bedtime (They go to be between 7:30-8 p.m. every night and wake around 6 a.m.) I'm thinking of implementing a behavior chart and making that the number one task my son has to follow to earn a reward he chooses. Any other ideas? TIA!!!

 

We occasionally have trouble with bedtime after their routine has been thrown off for more than a day or two (example, staying with grandparents for a week and sleeping in the same bedroom as grandparents, or staying in a hotel for a few days with us, etc.) - they want to get up for a drink, a hug, they have to pee, etc. Instead of implementing a behavior chart for staying in bed, I do it a bit reversed:

They start the night off with a few things they enjoy to have at bedtime:

music playing
blinds open
hall light on
books in bed
multiple stuffed animals
(and more depending on the day, LOL)

They know that they start losing bedtime privileges if they cannot/do not stay in their beds:

1. music goes off
2. white noise machine goes on (which they hate!)
3. books are removed from the bed and so on

Usually we can get away with just a reminder and a warning that the "next time someone ________, we will have to _________", but sometimes we have to actually start taking away privileges - but we usually only get to turning off the music and turning on the noise machine.

Within a few days of the noise machine being back on, life is good at bedtime again. :laughing:

Good luck!!

 

I also start taking things away. For awhile we had the dresser beside dd's bed, and they would get up and mess with the lullabies, turning them up or off, or unplugging them...etc. So I'd just take the whole cd player out.

Now though, I do like Jori. "Next time you get up, the lullabies are going off." Then we start taking stuffies away. I take away whatever they are sleeping with at the time (right now they are on their stuffed giraffe kick so it goes first). Next time I'll take away the next stuffed toy. So far it only gets to turning the lullabies off and they usually settle down.

A reward chart definitely works for some kids. But I prefer more of an immediate response. Rather than "be good now and you get xxxxxx tomorrow" I'd rather "behave now or xxxxx goes bubye for the night".

 

I agree with both Jori and Danielle. My son went through a phase of getting revved up at bedtime. We do have the same routine, he turns his tot clock blue, turns the songs on, looks out the window (this is all after story time, hugs and kisses, getting ready for bed, etc.) but then he would keep getting out of bed needing another hug, kiss, drink, having to pee, whatever else he could think of to delay bedtime.
I found that it was easier not to have his sister in the room (my two sleep in separate rooms) and I sit with her while DH puts him to bed. I think not having her there to egg him on does help out.
We have taken things away as well and bedtime goes much better now.