I returned to work full-time 3.5 weeks ago and it just isn’t getting any easier. I agonized over the decision on whether or not to return and eventually decided that I’d give it a try. Part-time was not an option for my job. Financially, dh and I might be able to swing it with just his income but we’d likely have to dip into savings and I don’t really want to do that. I have looked for other PT work but haven’t really found much. I just miss them all the time and I am still nursing/pumping and every time I know it is a feeding time, I just sit here wishing I was there to nurse them. For those of you that returned to work, does it get easier? Does anyone do part-time and if so, how did that work out? How about those who left a job to stay home with the babies? I would love to hear any and all stories as I am still struggling with this. Kelly
It will eventually get easier. I have pictures of my babies with me all the time. I would look at the pictures while I was pumping. I also have pictures of them on my computer. It actually makes me smile when I get to my desk and see pics of my girls there. Are you happy with your day care situation? I think it makes it easier. I love the lady who watches my girls, so it makes it easier for me to leave them in her care.
I went back to work at the end of August. I had a really hard time, I felt guily because I had always planned on staying home. Then we had them and realized that to live comfortably we needed both incomes. Lots of moms said it was good for me to got back to work so I could have "me" time and that they will be with someone other than me. That was not at all what I was thinking (i never minded not having "me" time or only having the company of babies, plus I didn't want someone else seeing their "firsts"). Slowly it has started to get easier. It was happening the DH was putting them to bed before I got home and that was something I couldn't deal with. So I asked DH to keep them up until I got home and then I could give them baths and put them to bed. It is a lovely routine that I have gotten used to and now love it. Good luck it will get better.
I came back to work the 15th and so far it's not easier yet and pt isn't a option at my work either......DH and I are considering letting me stay home but it's gonna be a big descion cause I am the one who carries the insurance and that's not something you need to be without anymore. but my mom keeps my babies at my house so that helps with the stress some.
I left my job to stay home. It's been an adjustment financially. We really have to stick to our budget now, and there always seems to be some unforseen expense that has to come out of savings each month. It's kind of why the $ is there, we planned for me to SAH awhile ago and knew it would be tight. But at the same time I hate the thought that our savings is constantly being dipped into. Me working full time was just not an option for me. I worked long hours and had a long commute, so I'd never see the babies. I'm currently happy with our situation. I know I will be looking for something PT in the next couple years or so, when it seems it will work into our schedule. In the meantime, I would like to hold off with that as long as possible, unless our finances dictate otherwise. It was an adjustment though. It's a big part of you that you give up - pretty much all your independence! I always said I wouldn't care, but I didn't realize how hard it would be until I was actually in the middle of it. It does help now that I take them out more, I get ready for the day, wear normal clothes again, etc. I am much happier now than I was in the beginning. With your situation, it will probably get easier. I hear that from working moms all the time. It just depends deep down what you really want. You could always give the SAHM thing a try while looking for something PT in the meantime. Then you would have the best of both worlds. Or, you might have a career you really don't want to give up, and you'll find that sticking it out will work out and things will get much better a couple months from now. Good luck with your decision, I know it's never easy!
Ummmm, yes it gets easier but at the same time it gets harder. It's easier because you get back in the rhythm of going to work. It gets harder because your babies are going to grow up and start becoming more and more cuter and doing cute things. Their personalities will start to really come out and it sucks to miss that.
Kelly, I am in a similiar and was searching this site for the exact same thing.. I came back to work 2 weeks ago yesterday when my babies were 10 1/2 weeks old.. My mom is watching them for another week and then I have to figure out child care.. I miss them terribly and I am so miserable leaving them daily. It has not gotten any easier for me and it actually gets harder when I hear about how much they are smiling during the day and then when I get there, they do not smile at me ( guess they use all those smiles up on Grandma!).. I just know they are going to roll over any day now and I am going to miss it.. I wonder if they even have a bond with me b/c of how much I am gone.. I work about 50 hours a week and I wish my office would let me go part time or work from home. I think my supply is dwindling also b/c of this.. I nurse throughout the night ( they are not sleeping through the night yet).. and they get bottles when I get home just about until bedtime. I like what someone said about staying at home while looking for a part time job.. only problem is it could take a long time to find.. sorry Kel, I have no advice.. I am in the same boat as you! <a href="http://lilypie.com"><img src="http://b1.lilypie.com/21IRm4.png" alt="Lilypie 1st Birthday Ticker" border="0" /></a>
I went back to work FT when my babies were 12 weeks old, and, for me, yes, it has gotten a lot easier. I cried every night for a week; but gradually we adjusted to our new routine and I realized that the boys were not going to forget me or love their teachers more--and more importanly, they were going to be well cared for and happy. However, I love my job, which I think helps a lot. You didn't indicate whether you were happy with yours or not; but I bet if that weren't the case, I would feel differently. I still feel torn, of course. I think all moms do. For stay at home moms, there are different kinds of pressures and stresses as well. A couple of things that help me are that, personally, I feel that I am more patient with them and appreciative of our time together in the evenings and the weekends than I would be if I were with them all the time, and when we are together, that is the focus--time with the boys is priority #1. Ultimately, you need to make the choice that's right for you and your family personally, professionally, and financially. But I think it's important to remember that there isn't one "right" way to raise your children; and there are positive and negative aspects of being both a working in the home and working outside the home mom. In response to my conveying my guilt over the whole working/daycare thing, a SAHM friend of mine said that motherhood is frought with guilt no matter what you do, so you might as well do what makes you and your family happy. Best of luck to you as you evaluate and make decisions. Hang in there!
I stayed home with the boys until they were 10.5 months old and decided to return to work as a teacher this year. Having worked for 6 years before I had my boys, I really missed it when I was at home. I probably could have stayed home again, but DH was pushing me to go back to work, and I was really wanting something more than staying home all the time. Unfortunately, I am a teacher, and there really is no parttime work that would even cover daycare. On the other hand, I am a teacher, which affords me a great deal of time off so I feel like it is a trade off. If I could, I would love to work parttime and spend half the time at home with my babies. If you could find a gig doing that, I certainly think it is the best.
