babysitting situation

i am off work now until the twins are born and then my regular recovery time 6-8 wks after then going right back to work m-f 8-6pm usually sometimes 930-6pm. my DW works full time different hours and has to start taking college classes in feb for her work which means m-th she will be in class in the am and working the swing 3-11 shift or the graveyard shift 11-7am. at 1st my mother-in-law had stated she would watch the twins for us but not all the time like a couple days a week, which was reasonable, but yesterday it wa brought up and she said "she is not watching them for us while we work" if we need a babysitter to go out or have plans then yes for a couple hrs but not each day. (IM SO GRRRRRR) and stressed because now i have to start looking for daycare when my babies are barely 2 months old and will possibly be premies and dont want them around all those other kids with germs lol. any suggestions on inexpensive daycare?? we are not a broke family but our expenses are limited at times. i know its kinda early to think about it but i dont want it to come and go then i ahve 2 weeks off left and still no sitter. what am i to do??? does anyone know of daycares that will give a discoutn because there are 2??

also are there risks with me putting my babies into daycare, so early in there life weather they are born 4lbers or 7lbers??

 

Most daycares will give a discount if you have more than one child enrolled (twins or not). It's definitely smart to start looking now. I currently have a nanny but I'm thinking about putting them in daycare sometime after the new year. I may wait until they turn two in the spring to avoid the winter germs, but I'm currently researching.

 

It is not to early to start looking. Sorry about your mil backing out on you. I will say that my mil watches my girls and even though she does it for free and she loves the girls, it is not always the best situation. She has tendencies to feed them when she wants and does not care anything about making them take naps. That is whole different vent though. Maybe you could find an older couple that could watch them, or someone that could come to your house. That would be really great if you could find someone to come to your house.

Missy

 

If you're going to place them in a daycare you're definitely not too early, some of them have a year waiting list (but it will depend on where you live, I live in a big city and finding a daycare for infant is really difficult). and i'ts even harder to find a place for 2 of them! so I would definitely hurry. They usually give you a rebate but it's not that great.

This being said, I understand that you are worried about the germs especially if they are premies. On top of it, in our case, paying daycare for 2 infants and one toddler is really too much. so my MIL will take care of them for up to the first 6 months and in the meantime we'll try to find a nanny. For a nanny you are not too late. It's pretty common to start looking about 2 months before the due date (according to nannies agencies, but I wouldn't go with them they are so expensive and not really useful in my experience, I'd look for websites for local nannies or word of mouth etc.). It is a little difficult in the case of multiples to know what the due date will be, but anyway too early usually doesn't work because people won't commit. I would try to negociate with your mum, explain to her that it may be difficult for you to find the best child care option right away and that you had understood she would take care of them full days. Then maybe she could agree to be a back up if you still haven't found the right person after your maternity leave is over.

Good luck!

 

Yes, start looking now! And let me tell you, I am SO frustrated with trying to find daycare. I visited one center and it was SO expensive. Oh and the discount they give you? Usually 10%. Which honestly doesn't help. I may look into a nanny because I think that might be cheaper and easier than a center. I'm also looking at in home places, but that is frustrating because the places I've called tell me they won't know what their openings are until closer to August (when I need care). It's just so frustrating and time consuming.

 

If you are set on putting the babies in daycare then I would definitely start looking now, you'll want to find one that you are both very comfortable with. I know it always seems like the best option is for them to be with family but twins are a lot of work for Grandmas to handle all day by themselves. My mom LOVES watching the boys but when she has to have them all day you can tell by the look on her face when we come to get them, that she is beat!

It seems like you guys have a pretty full schedule as did my DH and I when we found out we were having twins. The boys were our first babies and I don't think DH realized how much he would want to be with the babies and was unwilling to give any of his stuff up, neither was I for that matter. He was working full time, going to school full time and volunteering, I was working full time. He was really concerned about how he was going to manage all of this and take care of babies, and I was set on going back to work by the time they were 3 months old. After the babies came, EVERYTHING changed. DH decided not to take summer classes and gave up some of his volunteer work, and I am STILL at home with them. We have had to make a lot of changes and sacrifices to make things work but I wouldn't have it any other way. DH loved being able to spend more time home with us when they were first born and I will have a really hard time putting the boys in daycare when the time does come.

The only reason I say any of this is because I spent a lot of time worrying about who was going to take care of my babies the way I would and I was sooo stressed. Each day that went by with them made the decision easier. Be prepared and check out your options but also allow for things to change. You will be amazed as to how fast 2 months will go by. I know that not everyone's situation allows for a parent to be home so I hope this isn't offensive in anyway (DH and I are by noooo means well off in the finance department). I am just sharing my experience, I NEVER thought I would be a stay at home mom! Good luck with your babies and do what ever is best for your family, your babies will be fine! Sorry I don't have more input on the daycare situation. Maybe you can work something out with mom to watch them at least a portion of the time, it will save you big time without putting too much strain on her.

 

I would also look into home based day care centers. In NJ they are licensed as well and must comply with the Division for Children Standards. In home day care tend to be a little more flexible and about half of the price. I would check woth your county/city to see if they have a registry and then look at the same just as you would a day care center. I would talk with people in your neigborhood to get some referrals and reference.
Good Luck!

 

thank u all very much, im going to see what i can do with the mil and maybe a inhome care center. trying to see if i can find someone that will come to our home. that would be so much easier with twins, well see but u all have helped alot thank u very much!!!