Anyone not have a "Traditional" Baby Shower?

I know that most people have the traditional baby shower, where all the girls get together and play games and open presents etc... Well, that is just not me. I would like to celebrate these babies coming by having a BBQ and getting all of our friends (guys and gals) together and hanging out, more of a party of sorts. My DH says he will not go to a "Baby Shower" so we have re-named it the "Baby Bash". Well, my MIL thinks this is a rediculous idea, and that I still need to have a "traditional" baby shower.

Did anyone else break away from the norm and do a co-ed event? How did it go? Did you have any planned activities? I am just really excited to get all of my friends and family together and celebrate the fact that we are having TWIN GIRLS!! Just because it doesn't fit in within the definition of "traditional" doesn't mean I am doing anything wrong...does it?

 

Are these the first grandkids for your MIL? If so she may just have been looking forward to throwing you a "traditional" baby shower.

If not, it is probably just a new idea to her. I would have your DH pitch the idea to her and tell her this is what the two of you want to do instead of a baby shower. He should tell her he would like to attend and have his friends attend too, but they wouldn't like to come to a "baby shower". She can still plan games and such for those that want to participate. Just let her be involved in the planning, if that is what she wants. Good luck.

 

I love that idea and wish we were doing that instead of the traditional baby shower. Oh, well.

 

With DS, I didn't want a traditional baby shower either. I wanted a big party and wanted to invite men and women. This was the first grandchild/nephew/neice for all of our family. Needless to say, I got a traditional co-ed baby shower. At least we got to invite couples. I found it to be a lot like a bridal shower - it wasn't really for me or about what I wanted - it was about my family and friends and what they wanted. I went with it.

However, I think it would be AWESOME if you could throw a BBQ or have a real 'party' - I would suggest having some traditional aspects of it - like gift giving - you could go with a theme - like diapers or books and don't make it so "awwwwww, sweet (you know what I mean)". Then have a big BBQ and invite men and women and have a cake. Maybe that would satisfy everyone?

Good luck with that -
Jenny

 

In my world, the co-ed baby celebration seems to be more of the norm than the old "just girls" baby shower.

My mom had mine when we were home last month and there were plenty of men there. We didn't have a BBQ - we decided to have just dessert, punch, coffee and tea. There were about 40 people and we mainly just socialized with everyone and then opened gifts. It was great. I really find those baby shower games annoying and it was great for me to see all my family and friends...not just the women.

Cary

 

I did the coed barbeque with my son, and it went well- we had fun, but mostly hubby's family showed up and hardly anyone brought anything for my son!!! I was kind of disappointed! It was supposed to be put together and stuff by my MIL and SIL, but they didn't end up doing it, and I ended up paying for and doing everything!!! But as far as the coed part goes, I think it is more fun! The girls at work are throwing me one, a baby shower for the girls but that is it so far. I was thinking about my sons b-day- he will be 2 in October- and thought about making it a big get together to celebrate the babies being on their way and his birthday, but I just don't know!
I think the coed thing is a good idea- your hubby took part in making these babies too, and I think he should be included with his friends and what not! You could always do to him like I did my hubby- I made him wear a balloon under his shirt so he could look like me, ha ha ha!

 

I think that sounds like a lot of fun. I think you should do a game where the guys have a competition to drink beer out of a bottle! How fun!

 

Of course it's not wrong. Plenty of people nowadays have a co-ed shower. My mom is doing almost all of the work (my sister is helping in a small capacity). So, we're getting the traditional baby shower. We're happy just to be having one. But, if it were up to us, we might have looked into the possibility of having a bbq. It's sounds like SO MUCH more fun . Our female oriented showers are kind of lame, but still very nice to visit with everyone. After all, there's the opportunity to visit with people we don't see everyday.

I say mention it and go for the coed if you can. HTH. Let us know how it turns out.

 

We are not having a "traditional" baby shower. Ours is co-ed and kid friendly. As mentioned in a previous post the guys are doing the beer drinking contest out of baby bottles. We also have a couple other games planned in case anyone wants to play them. And we are having a bounce house for the kids. My husbands grandma doesn't like that it's co-ed, but I don't care. She complains about a lot of stuff we do. We don't do anything traditional. I didn't have a bridal shower either. We had a "Wedding Shower" and everyone was invited. As far as I'm concerned he helped make the babies so why can't he help celebrate.

I forgot to mention. I'm also doing most of it myself. My Mother in law told me I could plan everything and do what I want and she'll pay for it. So I'm getting exactly what I want instead of someone planning something thats totally not me.

 

I went into the hospital for PTL late the night before my "traditional" baby shower. it went on without me When i got out of the hospital, I couldn't bring myself to open the gifts without an audience - I don't know, it just felt weird. So we invited everyone who'd attended the first shower, plus spouses and children, to a pizza party at our house a few weekends later. not everyone could make it, of course, but we had about 20 adults. The women opened up gifts in the living room while the men and children watched basketball in the family room. We had plenty of time to mix and mingle, though. it turned out really nice and I felt like I got some sort of a shower.

My surprise shower at work was also coed - everyone I work with plus their spouses (and mine). very cool.

i have been to a few coed showers as well and I thought they were all great. One was a BBQ and the other was a wine and cheese - both were fairly small (under 20 couples), no games (thank goodness), people just eating/drinking/socializing type events.

 

Most of the baby showers I've attended over the last couple of years have been co-ed...and they've been a BLAST! Honestly, way more fun than the traditional showers I've attended before. Including the people who care about you in a celebration is not wrong, no matter what your MIL says. I hope you get the shower you deserve!

 

I have had both. My husband is chinese and showers are not a custom in Chinese families. We had a family dinner and included some friends. My mom and sister really wanted to do a women only shower for me, so we did it with the women in my family. I think it comes down to who is hosting and what they want to do. If you want to throw a baby bash, go for it. However if you want your MIl to do it, you might want to reconsider and let her do what she wants.

Regardless have fun and enjoy this time.

 

we did have a traditional, small, family "babies" shower, but my DH wants to have a "man shower" and invite his buddies over for bbq and beer and all they have to bring is diapers lol.

 

I had both. My mom and MIL did a traditional shower for me. They phrased it more as an "Open House" though. We had food, no games and people could come and go as they wanted and I opened gifts the whole time. I have a large extended family, so I'm glad they did the more traditional shower for them. Then my friends (per my encouraging) threw us a couples shower. My DH LOVED the fact that he was included in that one, it meant a lot to him. They did it in Hawaiian Laui theme. It was a lot of fun.

 

i had a traditional baby shower with our families (we had to travel to it - they live 1000 miles away) and then friends where we live threw us a co-ed shower which was a party. could you do something like that?

 

You should do what you want, but you are going to host your own baby shower or baby bash? I didn't have anything to do with the planning of mine, my mom and 3 good friends did it all and I didn't know anything about the planning at all and that's the way I wanted it, I just showed up and enjoyed it. And it was really nice too! There is no way I would be able to get my DH to go to any sort of shower, I know that much!

 

I am not having a baby shower. Don't think anyone has thought of it. I haven't mentioned it to anyone. If I were to have one I would probably want a party like you are going to have - I think it's a great idea. I'm not really into the cutesy stuffy MIL stuff.
Just think of yourself as innovative. lol. It's your life, your memories that you are making - do what makes you happy!!!

 

We had a non-traditional party. My husband and I decided we wanted to celebrate the occasion together and didn't want to leave out the spouses or kids.. My SIL hosted and ended up doing a luau theme, which everyone enjoyed. We basically just grilled out and let everyone get together. We had our pool open and some games set up for the kids, and let the adults do their own thing. It was great! All of my family/friends showed up for the event and we got rave reviews..

Now, my husband's family, that was a different story. I think they were in the mindset of your MIL. My MIL had an invitation list of 74! Our first party (which ended up just being my close family/friends had a list of 25 - and everyone came) was held when it could accomodate the scheduling of family coming in from out of town. Our second party turned into a disaster. First of all, invitations were sent out saying "Baby Shower/Open House" - so the men didn't want to come, and of all things to leave out - they didn't let anyone know where we were registered! Nothing was every confirmed - even the amount of people showing was unknown until the day. We had a total of 18 people show, and thank God I had asked my best friend to come over and help with the event because the two people hosting the whole thing (my MIL and her daughter) didn't do squat. They were supposed to show up a couple of hours early to help set up things, and didn't get here until about a half hour before guests started showing.. I ended up doing a bunch of setting up - which meant a lot of standing..while the two of them expected my husband to run around and do things for THEM! My friend came in and was like, "what the heck are you doing in the kitchen?"... We ended up setting up stuff together, and then when the party was over guess who got to clean up? You got it - me, my friend, and my husband..



So, my advice to you is that if you MIL doesn't want to have the type of party you want to have - then have someone you know you can rely on give you the party you want! You earned it! It's not worth the hassle or disappointed of letting someone else ruin what should be your special day.

 

We had a huge co-ed Baby party! It was so much fun! We figured that these would be our only little ones, so we wanted to share in the occassion! We even had a pinata in the shape of a stork that my husband got to whack at. Many of my closest friends are guys so if I had done the traditional thing, I wouldn't have gotten to spend any time celebrating with my buds. Our party started at 1 in the afternoon and we were saying good-bye to our final guest at 10pm. I say, go for it!

 

We're also having a Co-Ed baby shower. It will be hosted by two of my closest friends and two sisters-in-law. They asked if we would prefer all female or co-ed and I immediately opted for co-ed. I just always thing they're so much more fun than the traditional ones. I'm a little nervous about how I'll look though since I'll be 31 weeks then.

Anyway, I think your BBQ sounds great ... have fun!

 

Our "shower" is being planned by a friend and will be in the evening (7 pm) and for guys and gals. No games, just hanging out, wine, beer (not for me, of course!) and fun.

I had a traditional shower with DD, and it was fun, too. But since this is our second pg, we wanted to do it differently.