Anyone else feeling sad about first birthdays?

I don't know why it is a big deal to me, but I am having such a hard time with the fact my girls are about to turn 1. I start to cry just thinking about it. I know it's not like I'm going to lose them when they turn 1, but I feel like they won't be babies anymore. I don't mean that I think they are adults or anything, of course, but I guess I'm just sad that they are no longer infants. Is anyone else going through this?

ETA - I really enjoyed the infant stage and I just hate to see it over. I loved having two little helpless babies to care for and do everything for. 1 year ago I was still pregnant, and now they are crawling super fast, and can get around the room by pulling up and cruising. It won't be long before they are walking. I know it's good for them to grow but it makes me so sad. It's just gone by way too fast and I hate that!

I can't think of anything that is going to be better in the second year than the first. I can't think of anything that is better than having two infants. If anyone reads this with babies that are in their second year, can you tell me some things that are better about the 2nd year that will maybe cheer me up?

 

I have not cried but not much makes me cry. I hated being pregnant and hated the newborn stage but for some reason I AM really sad about my babies turning 1.
I think its because this is it for me, I wont ever have more babies (I hated being pregnant THAT much!) so I want to enjoy EVERY moment and these moments are going too fast! And its scary knowing that I am molding these two into little people. Thats a lot of pressure!!

 

QUOTE(cohlee @ Sep 8 2008, 09:10 AM) [snapback]968873[/snapback]
I have not cried but not much makes me cry. I hated being pregnant and hated the newborn stage but for some reason I AM really sad about my babies turning 1.
I think its because this is it for me, I wont ever have more babies (I hated being pregnant THAT much!) so I want to enjoy EVERY moment and these moments are going too fast! And its scary knowing that I am molding these two into little people. Thats a lot of pressure!!


Aimee- I don't have kids that are two but I gotta echo you and Cohlee here. I approach my babies 1st birthday with sadness. I have to agree with Cohlee that for me is that I will not have any other babies after these guys (my own choice) so it makes me sad that their "Baby year" has passed so fast!

 

I could have written the exact same post-except I probably would have cried through the whole thing!!!!!! My boys will be one a week before your twins. I honestly try not to think about it because it is just so sad. I just LOVE having my babies-and them needing me. I miss those days when they were so small, and they would instantly fall asleep on your chest, or in your arms. I miss when they didn't move-and you could just stare at them all day(I still can!). I miss feeding them(they do that themselves now...). Oh the list is endless!

I just don't want them to grow up. I want them to be babies forever. Honestly. They are just the best babies and I never want it to end. Sure I want to see the people they become, but gosh-it's just going by way too quick for me and I wish someone would make it stop!

And yes-I was buying their first birthday party supplies-and CRYING in the iparty store because they are going to be one! It was such a long road of infertility, and this last year of having them has flown by....

Make it stop!

 

With their first birthday looming 2 weeks away I am finding myself so nostaligic and sad. I know that it just keeps getting better and better but I just can't fathom the fact that I am about to have TODDLERS!!!! I feel so proud that we have survived and flourished this first year and I am so looking forward to watching the twins grow and change and explore the world but part of me just wants to hold on to my little babies just a little bit longer.

Glad I'm not the only one who feels this way.

 

:hug: Aimee, I don't want mine to be toddlers either sometimes. I waited so long for my babies, and poof, the first year is just about over. From what I can tell, there are new levels of fun as they get older. They can do, and enjoy, so much more! :hug:

 

(my) POSITIVES:

Walking-makes things so much easier!

Feeding themselves-again makes things so much easier (you can multi task while they are eating).

One nap-more freedom

Table food-feed from a kids meal when on the go and have some fun and not have to cook another freakin meal of the same thing.

More interactive-able to talk a bit and interact with you and their sibling. Its very cool.

Lots of hugs and kisses. I love to sit on the floor and play with them and one of them will bring me a book and just back into my lap and sit down. :wub:

There is LOTS to look forward too. This is only the beginning. Can you tell I totally love toddlerhood? Dont get me wrong, it definitely has its own challenges but there is alot of fun too!

 

I cant even tell you how great it continues to get! I remember thinking at 6 months that I loved the stage they were at and then again a few months later, loving that stage.

Can you imagine though how you will feel when they look at you and say "kiss" or "hug" or "-ank you momma" when you hand them something. Or when they sing words to their favorite songs and run around the house dancing!

Can you imagine how it will feel as you watch them use their little minds in ways you never could have imagined?

I love when my boys hug each other so hard that they fall to the floor cracking up! It is so awesome!

I love that they have fallen in love with certain things (trains, books, dancing, puzzles)

I love that they use their imagination when they play with their play food at the table!

These are just things I can think of off the top of my head!

I think you are going to love the next year! Oh, and wait until they turn two! This has been my favorite stage by far!!!

 

Oh my gosh - the second year is so much better than the first. Every day is better than the next. I love having toddlers!

My girls are little people now, and all of their wonderful attributes are just magnified now that they're older. When they were babies, they would cuddle into me for comfort. Now that they're walking, they come running over and throw their arms around me and cuddle. It's the same, but better!

I would write more, but the PPs already covered all the wonderful things about babies growing up. Truly, even if you love the baby stage, you will enjoy the early toddler stage more. Don't be sad...

 

I know what you mean, I will miss the baby stage and sometimes when I am out and see a tiny baby I get sad but I'm REALLY looking forward to what all the pp's have mentioned....walking, talking, feeding themselves, telling me they love me...etc! For me, the first year has been the most tiring, insane, crazy, exhausting...you name it year of my life, as amazing as it has been, I'm looking forward to it HOPEFULLY getting easier.
I'm looking forward to the boys birthday's more for DH and I to celebrate together how far we've come in the last year, to celebrate the fact that we MADE it without killing each other or going insane.

I do have to say though, I REALLY miss being pregnant...I ABSOLUTELY loved it and everyday I look back on last years calander to see what I was doing last year or what appointments I had this time last year...yes, very weird.

 

QUOTE(melissak @ Sep 8 2008, 11:47 AM) [snapback]969217[/snapback]
I'm looking forward to the boys birthday's more for DH and I to celebrate together how far we've come in the last year, to celebrate the fact that we MADE it without killing each other or going insane.


Amen Sister!!!! That is the one thing I keep holding onto undertoning all the nostaligia of missing my itty bittys.

 

Aimee :hug: I was a little sad as we ended our first year. It's almost like a triumph of sorts and then just like that it's over and you can't savor your "victory" of surviving the first year.

Right after 12 mos. we had about 6 weeks of ROUGH stuff. They were clingy and whiney I thought I would lose my mind. By about 18 mos. their language EXPLODED (they also started walking at 17 & 18 mos.) and things got more and more fun!! Really! They change SO MUCH the first year and then the changing (in terms of growth and stuff) starts to slow down a little. It's a very different year, but I enjoyed it a lot! They get funnier and "funner"....

I have to warn you, our 2nd year went WAY faster than the first!! So, just ENJOY IT because it zooms by! :hug:

 

QUOTE(~* dfaut *~ @ Sep 8 2008, 11:00 AM) [snapback]969255[/snapback]
I have to warn you, our 2nd year went WAY faster than the first!! So, just ENJOY IT because it zooms by! :hug:


Ack!! Don't say that!!!

I also miss being pregnant as someone else mentioned! And that is a good point about it being tough on our marriage, it was very difficult on our marriage, especially at first and really it still is. I guess that is a reason to celebrate. Thank you for pointing out some things to look forward to because all I keep thinking is how I'm losing my little babies. :cry: Even if I have another baby it probably won't be twins again, and it wouldn't be the same even if it was.

 

:hug: Aimee! I felt the EXACT same way when the girls turned 1. It was a very emotional time for me, but I have to say the last 6 months (the girls will be 18 months this week) have been SOOOOO fun! Here are some highlights just from the last week:

1. Ana walking over to me for no reason and giving me a hug and a kiss!
2. Watching Meara share her sippy with her stuffed kitty and then saying "MMMM Milk!"
3. Taking them out to eat last night with a big group and it was fun! They ate their dinner (mac & cheese and sweet potato fries, some of momma's chicken quesadilla and daddy's burger)... And DH and I got to eat too!
4. The freedom of being able to take them more places without having to be home for a nap or a bottle (they can be much more flexible with their schedules).
5. Seeing how much their care about each other (after DH and I close their bedroom door at night they both say "night!" to each other).

 

I was an emotional wreck when the boys turned one. Bawled and bawled. Couldn't believe my babies were growing up. There are times I think back on how small they were or how we had to do x, y, or z for them but I love this second year.

Some positives for us:

Walking...not near the frustration for me or them. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm busy running around after them but walking makes them happy...it's just me being able to keep up with them.

They can actually follow commands and enjoy helping me clean up.

Self-feeding is great...we're working on spoons and forks but finger feeding is great!

Sippy cups are fabulous...and I certainly don't miss washing bottles!

We're starting to talk and it's great fun to listen to all their new words and phrases!

I love when I ask for a hug or sugars...they actually can do it!

I love when mine call out "bubba" and go looking for brother and walk back into the room holding each other's hands.

We're learning to share and it's great because they will usually grab two toys and carry one over to brother!

One nap...great because I know when it is, how long it is, and I know exactly what I can get done during it! Also allows for greater freedom in getting out of house and stuff.

I'm not quite so paranoid about germs, bumps, bruises, what nots...they happen. This makes me a more relaxed person.

When they do fall or get upset, they run to me calling "mama" like I'm the only one in the world that can fix it...not really a positive but it lets you know how important you really are in their eyes!

These are just a few I can think of...there are so many. I know the first year is sentimental but hang on...this second year is gonna be great!

 

Yup - sad. Can't believe a year has flown by.

 

For me, when my dd #1 gives me hugs and says "I love you mama"...well that is definately something you can be looking forward to.
These past couple years with my singleton have been a blast! I love this age! They are so funny and they learn and say the funniest things...I honestly cant wait until these babies get to be that age-it has really been the time of my life!
Of course during that time I obviously missed having a baby around and wanted another

 

For me, everything was better the second year. Then again, I hated being pregnant, and I didn't particularly like having two helpless babies. The more they could do, the happier I was! 12-13 months was kind of annoying (though still better than the newborn stage IMO), but right after that, it got to be so much fun.

But even if you like having two babies.... It's so much fun when they can talk! They will crack you up every single day. Plus, I love the way a brand-new toddler wobbles around and falls BOOM right on the diaper, then gets right back up and tries again. I could watch that all day. And they suddenly realize there's a whole world out there and they love it! They will watch everything, be curious, explore and investigate.

 

Everything is better now for us!! I love this age so much!!

We can go on outings that the girls really enjoy. They point at things and talk and tell me the cutest things!

They play with each other so well. Like real imaginative play. So cute!

They can tell me what they want on most days!

They can run around in the yard and I can chase them!

We can try all kinds of crazy new foods and they can eat the same foods that DH and I do!

They run over and give me big hugs for no reason at all!!

I wouldn't trade this age for anything!!!!

 

Sniff sniff** this is the best thread I've read in a long time! You all have me feeling so many emotions! I went through this with DD1 but that was eons ago. Being a parent is the best thing in the entire world for me. thank you all for sharing!

 

I just have to say I must be one of the odd ones out here. I don't feel any sadness at all that they will be turning one soon. They are my last babies (my choice - I'm with cohlee - HATED being pregnant) and I CANT WAIT to teach them things. Cant wait to hear them say Mummy - and mean me!! Cant wait for them to begin to understand more, interact more and be more independent. Mostly I cant wait for them to WALK YAAAAAAAAAY that will be awesome.