Anyone do a grade skip?

Tonight at conferences for PreK- my DDs teacher asked us if we ever thought of skipping K for both of them.

My girls are Oct kids. We tried to do early entry K (since they had already been enrolled in K and days away from starting when we moved) no way- no how. Red shirting is common here- it was not in the state we came from.

So the girls are registered for K for next fall.

Our options are:

1. go to K in regular classroom. I already spoke to them and been to the school, nice typical K class. local kids from preschool will attend she they will know some of the kids there. Considered one of best schools in area on state tests (which we all know does not mean it is a GOOD school). Home school is excellent reputation & fairly affluent area, but big class sizes (24-27 for K). Very big school 700+ kids K-5. Start time of school works better for work schedules. Due to having 7-8 K classes, kids travel a lot to other classes for reading/math groups at their level and school has wide variety of resources available due to its size. Little diversity.

2. go to local less affluent school by my work that would offer a K/1st split class (both classes are K/1 splits) that does project based learning themes. They would be enrolled as K students. They have a support teacher I have already talked to at the school. that works with K/1 kids that have are already reading/writing in K. She sounded really supportive on the phone and she liked this school a lot (she rotates between schools). I have visited this school and it was a nice environment- small school 275+ kids. PreK-5. Will have 20-22 kids in class. Very diverse.

3. Try to see if entry to 1st is an option at either school and skip K. Dont think so- but can ask. I dont know if I like the idea either.


Hmmmm...... complication. One DD will be on a 504 and wears pull ups due to a congential digestive disorder, which adds a whole new element to it. The school nurses at both schools have been supportive, but I do wonder at the social implications.


No matter what---- in K they will be advanced older kiddos , in 1st they would be younger kiddos due to Oct Bday. As a side note, if we had stayed in Michigan they would have done K THIS year and going into 1st next fall....so I guess I dont see it as a full blown grade skip- rather they fall in that grey late/early birthday area.


Anyone do a split grade class K/1?

Anyone skip K or 1st?



** edited to add: Developmentally they are a mixed bag. Both schools are 10 minutes from our apartment so distance is not a problem.

DD1 is developmentally ahead and a leader to her peers (she is the one that has congential digetive disorder so she is very aware that she is wearing pull-ups and rather embarrassed at times). She has a very very long attention span/ability to focus and is d-r-i-v-e-n to know things. Slightly obsessive, but fairly mature for her age and gets along well with most kids- the exception being a slightly dominant personality that can clash with other dominant personalities. Leadership skills and very outgoing. Small for age.

DD2 is developmentally uneven. She has stellar attention span and is comfortable waiting/taking turns/working independently. She is a bit socially quirky and not 'mature' in the sense that she is still sorting out social cues (easily conned/manipulated , assumes the best in everyone, gullible). She had social skills classes when younger. Often, she fatigues quickly and may struggle with an all day program. Prefers adults to kids, but gets along with her peers- mellow kid with odd mannerisms at times, interests are not inline with typical kids her age ( has an invisible friend named 'Delaware' and is obsessed with the United States). Reserved, but not shy.


ARRRGH! I am a teacher and should have a firm opinion...but as a parent, I have such mixed feelings. I did not work/teach with K or 1st graders so I am not as familiar with that age bracket as older Elem kids. The area I came from did not do split classes at all- so I have little experience to base ideas on.

 

My girls are in a split 2/3 class. They all do the same spelling words, however all kids kinda go at their own pace on math and reading.

 

If it were me (and my oldest DD has an Oct bday as well) I would keep them in K next year. If you skipped to 1st they would be the youngest kids in the class. Keeping them in K for the fall would mean that maturity wise they would be better off and more able to handle the demands of school.

It would be a grade skip if you bumped them to 1st for the fall in the state you are in now, that's what you need to remember. I can honestly say that I am glad my oldest DD is one of the older kids in her class. You can certainly tell who the younger kids are...maturity wise. I personally just feel you are giving them the extra edge with them being the oldest, you are ensuring they wouldn't struggle. Can you say that if you bumped them up to 1st grade? How would you feel if they started to struggle in school then?

 

I have to disagree with this. My boys are among the youngest in their class and people are always surprised to hear that. They always think that they are at least 6 months older than they are. You can tell when kids fit in and when they don't. That goes both ways. Kids who are held so they can be the "oldest", but are more than ready to move on, can stick out as much as a child who is too "young" for the group. Every child is different, and for many being the youngest in the class is not a big deal. In our school, one boy actually skipped second grade because his parents had red shirted him to make him "older". After 1st, it was decided that he was so far ahead of his peers, socially, emotionally, and academically, he skipped up to 3rd, putting him into the class that he would have been in had he simply started "on time". I have also seen kids who should have been red shirted, and pushed on struggle, because they did need that extra year.

The determining factor should be the kids themselves. Like the OP said, had they not moved, the girls would have already been finishing K, and this would not be an issue. My niece had the opposite experience. She was slated to start K right before turning 6 due to her Sept. birthday. That spring they moved somewhere that had a different cut off, so she was able to start at just before turning 5. They sent her to K, when she was not prepared, since they had anticipated another year of preschool. As a result, she struggled in K and 1st, and I think is still a bit behind in 2nd.

 

I can honestly say that we were prepared to send them to K last year at 4 turning 5, totally comfortable with it maturity, socially, and academically ** they were screened by the schools & their PreK teacher suggested traditional K (vs Young 5s program)**

Yes, they both have 'issues' but the teachers and I felt that those would be concerns of personality and neurological functioning rather than sheer maturity. I know I can not predict the future, but I do think that I am comfortable with it if they were going into 1st this fall and do not think maturity will be a concern--- if it does it would be further down the line, and right now I need to make choices based on what I know now. There is no way to predict maturity levels in a decade,

I dont think being older either assures 'no struggles' either.

Yes, I totally agree. Having taught older kiddos ( 7+--- 3rd grade &up) I RARELY can tell who is old/young for grade and often am surprised at birthdays- the only time it is a concern when I was working with student with learning disabilities and the did not qualify by small margins for extra assistance due to age based norming vs grade based. Or when we were considering retention of a student that already was 'old' for grade or skip for 'young' for age. In those cases we often had the social school staff use the Iowa Acceleration Scale or Lights Retention scale. Both of which are good tools for helping decide, but are not the end all be all. Having worked with both scales, I know that the girls would likely be suggested for skip on paper. I just dont know if I am OK with skipping K.

We registered for K in the K/1 split. I think , right now, it is a good compromise until the school can get to know them better and also find out how well they will handle both DDs unique needs.

 

My twins will be in much the same situation as yours. This fall they will be 6 weeks too young for kindergarden, but one twin is WAY ready. (reading, writing, etc) and the other is totally average (would probably be fine in K this year) and both are MUCH taller than the other kids that would be in the class. But I am holding them both back. My mom (masters special needs, k. 1st) KEEPS telling me "You WANT them to be the oldest, smartest, tallest, etc. Especially when they are girls).
I hope she's right!

And I can't stand the option of them being in different grades!!!!!! No way!!! Who want's to be the twin in the grade below???

 

One thing I have learned is that academics are very important but Their social experience in school is equally important to their development. If they are academically brilliant - and socially extremely mature, I would skip k. Age would play no role in my decision. I would lean toward keeping them in k. Pre k is a great segue to k and k is a great segue to 1st. I would also keep them in the school closest to my house.

 

Since no one really addressed your question about split classes, I thought I'd mention that all my elementary grades (except K!) were in split classes. There were only 7 kids in my grade in my elementary school so we were bussed to K at another school then were in 1-2, 2-3, 3-4, 4-5, 5-6, and 5-6. Sometimes being in class with the year before us and sometimes with the year after, which were also both smallish groups. This was in the late 70s early 80s, so quite some time ago. But I remember we had science and social studies type things together as a whole class and reading and math in level groups which could be mixed between the grades. And our pull out classes, PE, art, music, library, were all together. I can't comment how it worked as a parent. I think what would matter most as a parent in that type of situation is having a teacher who was well organized and used to teaching that way.

 

No- I would NOT put them in different grades unless there was very very unique circumstances.

I dont see how being oldest goes w/ tallest or smartest--- or being girls. Honestly, my girls are short and likely will always be short. I dont care if they are smartest- I just want them busy enough for DD1 not to be bahavior problem (which she can be in PreK , she gets restless) either.

I , too, have a teaching degree and worked in Spec.Ed. I think it may be a regional thing. I have discussed it with some of my former co-teachers and as I stated before- holding back or waiting was very very rare where we moved from so it is still an odd concept to me. All the kids teachers I know sent their kiddos if they were eligible, not from any great insights- we had Young 5s for kids that 'qualified' (both on screening and by birthdate from June-Oct).

They are not academically brillant, but have mastered K material. Socially--- eh. They are actually very responsible and a very long attention span for their age- it is hard to know since there is such a big range for 5-7 yr olds.
We decided the best way to handle it is to do K/1 and take it from there. They will do most reading/math with 1st kids so we get the academic benefits, but will be in a class w/ 5-7 at age 6 so developmentally/socially just right.

 

I probably would do the k/1 simply because they would be known as kinders and have those expectations, see how the "older" kids act in class(modeling) they will be exposed to more challenging material but not seen as "different" in that respect.

We have one little on in the boys class that is academically ready but he is a year to a year and a half younger and honestly, at this age it is a big difference with behavior. That was not directed towards your girls but the comment that the age difference wont show up until "later". He is doing well now, but it has been a challenge for him and the teacher simply because he is a less mature than some of the kids and "missed" kinder where you do start learning how to act in school.

Back to your situation, I think I would have made the same choice. The only thing I would add is those smart kids can tend to put a lot of pressure on themselves and compare to others. I have one and when he comes up against something that is more challenging, he gets pretty stressed out. This is something we are working on, not perfection, but doing your best and knowing it is ok to make mistakes. The other one, he does not get stressed out. very different kids

 

change "oldest" to "youngest" and you describe Jonathan. Even though he is almost the youngest in his class he is a head taller than most everyone else, and one of the smartest. Chronological age does not necessarily determine who is the tallest or shortest in a grade.

 

If I want my kids to be the tallest I'm going to have to hold them back about 5 years! :woah: They're in the third percentile for height and always have been. Short parents=short kids. Their brains work just fine, though, even though they are the shortest and even though they are about mid-range for age in their grade. Given the choices list here I would have chosen K/1 for my particular children.

 

Yeah, I want my children to be good people. Oldest, smartest, tallest, is not part of that picture.
I live in an area where redshirting is not even an option. Kids go to school when they are the age and here the cutoff date is Dec. 31st. So the first grade class this past year was every kid who was born in 2004, It didn't matter if they had been 6 for 8 months or if they wouldn't be 6 for 4 more months. There will always be people in life who are older, smarter, taller, richer, funnier, prettier, what ever more than you. You can't escape that, in in K and not anywhere.


ETA: MamaKimberly, I'm guessing you mom tells you that to make you feel better for them not going this year, not because she's really stopped to think about the implications of that statement and truely believes it.

 

I know I keep coming back here, but in the past week, I ran into two different people, who may have a perspective. One is a 1st grader who (do to EI issues and other things repeated K). He is now just turned 8 and in 1st grade. He told me that he couldn't wait to move on, and that he hates being the oldest in his grade. It felt to me like his maturity has picked up, and he now feels out of place among kids some of whom are a full year or more younger than he is.

The second person I was talking to is finishing her junior year in college. Honestly, until today, I didn't even know her age. She is 22. She told me that she started college at 19 because she was placed in a transitional 1st grade class. She has ADD, and wasn't behaviorally ready for regular 1st (although the transitional program was individualized, and she worked well above grade level). Now that she is older, she feels like she is behind since she still has a full year left of undergraduate, and is ready to move on with her life.

I know it is a small anecdotal example, and in both cases there was a legitimate reason for a retention, but if these people who had real reasons are feeling this way, then think about a kid with no issues who is older just because their parents wanted them to be older than everyone else? Are there kids who need that extra year? Sure there are. But I believe that the decision should not be made based on chronological age, and superficial things like being bigger than the other kids. It should be made because that is what the child needs, socially, emotionally, and academically.

Sorry if this is beating a dead horse, but after having the same conversation with two very different people over the course of a week, I thought is would be something worth mentioning.

 

I think the K/1 split sounds great, and a smaller, more diverse school sounds great too. This is slightly OT, but we had our kinder orientation last night, and while the school is great and I have no qualms about sending my kids there, it is a huge school (I don't know exactly how many kids, but we got lost trying to find the library!) and all the other moms were 5'10" and blond. (Perhaps I exaggerate a tad... But it is a very affluent, 99% Caucasian neighborhood.) So right now, a smaller and more flexible/nurturing environment is sounding really good to me!

FWIW, I would not skip K. I might consider skipping a grade later if it's warranted. But it seems like kids learn so much about just being in school (even kids like mine who have been in FT daycare/preschool) in the K year -- it would be tough for them to jump in in 1st grade.

 

I appreciate the input!

I felt the same way at orientation for school #1 (home school). It is HUGE for an elem. school.I felt like my dumpy 12 yr old beat up station wagon was totally out of place in the parking lot.LOL. It is a very wealthy area and we are in one of the few non-luxury apartments (they are just standard plain jane apartments) that feeds into that school. 99% of the kiddos are upper income bracket and we are....not.The diversity piece bothered me too---we moved a lot as a kid, but I loved that I was exposed to a lot of diversity. I want the same for my kids.

I feel the same on skipping K. We did enroll in K/1 class and are awaiting to see if they have room since we are 'out of district'. I hope we get in! That school is willing to potentially skip grade 1- I feel that *if* (big if) the K teachers suggest it, we will consider it, but right now I want to see how K goes.

 

I can't wait to hear how it turns out. I know you made your decision, but I think it is a wise one. Having taught K, and now 1st for a couple years, there are sooooo many factors to consider. I think keeping the girls in a K class, with that exposure to 1st grade expectations will be very helpful. And the diversity factor is important too. That is something that my husband and I considered deeply, and continue to do so. (Our diversity is mainly with different Asian populations though, and the standards are incredibly high. Socioeconomics, not so much. All middle income.)

 

we have split classes here. and really they are not that different but a little. here they sort of pair you up with a buddy some what. they did do the same spelling words,but like someone else mentioned they did what ever year you were in math and reading. your girls sound like they would be perfect for this,I say give it a try. I mean its not as if you can't put them in the all day k class if you truly feel the k/1 class just isn't working.