Anyone deal with "prepartum" depression

I thought this would be the happiest time of my life. It's not. My life is in tumult and as I have posted before, I am having a really hard time being excited about twins as a single mom. If you've dealt with depression, how did you handle it? I hate to take drugs while pregnant. The psychotherapist recommended to me charges $250/visit. I don't know what to do to lift myself out of this.

 

:hug: I am so sorry you are feeling so down. :hug: Is there another Dr. within your insurance coverage that would be cheaper? I hope you are able to find some help soon! :hug:

 

QUOTE(BlessedThistle @ Apr 19 2009, 08:46 PM) [snapback]1280405[/snapback]
I thought this would be the happiest time of my life. It's not. My life is in tumult and as I have posted before, I am having a really hard time being excited about twins as a single mom. If you've dealt with depression, how did you handle it? I hate to take drugs while pregnant. The psychotherapist recommended to me charges $250/visit. I don't know what to do to lift myself out of this.


I'm so sorry you are feeling this way! Is there no other option other than the recommended doctor? My work offers 6 free therapy sessions a year, but then they start charging after that. I wouldn't want to take drugs, either, that would freak me out. Is there maybe a local twin group you can join for support? I'm also having a hard time getting excited about my twins, but I just found out this week and I hope to feel better about it by the time they come. I'm sorry I can't be more help. HUGS!

 

I suffered really bad at the beginning of the pregnancy but it did end up going away. Talking to friends, my family, and my hubby helped a lot. I've suffered more from anxiety than from depression regularly but this time I was truly sad... all the time. Try to talk to someone, a priest, another mother who is a friend, or even here, at the forum. Take care of yourself so you can take care of your babies and good luck.

 

Oh Honey I wish you lived closer to me. This is by far the hardest experience I've had to go through and unfortunately my dh struggles with it too!!! I wish we had each other to sit around and talk to!!

I'd definetly do more research on counseling, 5 htp and other natural anti-depressants, and know that I know that this is really hell, living every day in some sort of physical pain that's been there for months and/or needing support that isn't there. I know from reading other posts that these women do survive it.

I don't even remotely put myself in a category with them. I hate it and I feel guilty because others are so happy and excited about their pregnancies and some women are even envious. I'm usually a cheerful person who does try hard to make a situation work. But this one was beyond any experience I'd had from the get go. And I've been through enough already.


What's your story?

 

this is actually called antepardom depression and is more common then not. if you are in a depressive state for any length of time than you are putting those angels in your belly at risk. we, as twin mommies, know that preterm labor is all but given and adding depression and/or anxiety to the mix makes it all the more possible to go into pre preterm labor, which is not good for babies.

going through pregnancy untreated for depression can lead to behavioral problems, cognetive issues, possible mental health problems and of course preterm labor in babies. so in MOST cases it is best to seek the advice of a professional, therapist or psychiatrist, because more often then not the benefits of treating the depression and anxiety far outway the risks involved to the fetus.

now having said that, therapy can be a wonderful tool to help you through your depression but if persistant crying,, over a week continually, and/or suicidal thoughts become an issue you definetly need to seek medical options with drug therapy. the risk to the unborn babies, especially if passed your first trimester, are minimal. so i encourage you to find a doctor within your insurance plan that can help you. there are MANY antidepressant medications available to pregnant women that pose little to no risk to the fetus.

it's not healthy for you OR the babies to spend the entire pregnancy depressed. untreated antepardom depression is often a strong indicator that one will develop postpardom depression. so it's best to nip this in the bud now rather than wait until the babies arrive and you are too depressed to care for them or yourself.

i wish you the best of luck and belive me, i know exactly what you are going through. everytime a woman tells me that pregnancy was the happiest most joyful time in their lives i want to smack them and run away. i'm 22 weeks tomorrow and have not been a happy camper throughout my entire pregnancy but i'm seeking help and treatment. and my peri assured me that taking medications (within certain liminitations) is OK as i am passed the crucial developmental stages of pregnancy. what i am doing, by treating my depression now is saving my babies from future disaster, i.e. postpardom depression.

so again, best of luck and i hope you can find treatment soon! :hug:

 

Although I can not relate with being a single mother I can relate in the fact that I am not really enjoying this pregnancy. I was but then once I got put on bed rest all the excitement was swept out from under me...I have no one to talk to about it all day and when my husband gets home I am so stressed that I am not really too nice or talkative to him. I feel really bad about it.

I am glad you made this post as I am feeling similar but didn't know how to put it down in words.

My suggestoin is to get online and look at the twin groups. The one in my area meets 1x a month and maybe you can find some people you can talk to inbetween the meetings. I am learing that twin mothers seem to be very supportive of each other.

Good luck and keep us posted.

 

:hug: I am sorry you are struggling so much. What kind of support system do you have?
I wouldn't think being a single person and being pregnant with twins would be anything short of terrifying. When I found out I was carrying twins I cried everyday for weeks wondering if I could handle it. I am also married and have the support of a wonderful very involved spouse. I think you feelings are understandable. Feeling as though you should be so happy under such circumstances is, in many cases, is just unrealistic and setting yourself up for failure/disappointment.

I agree that you should talk to your insurance company bout finding someone more afffordable. Also call your OB or family practice doc. They can also help.

QUOTE(haleystar @ Apr 21 2009, 01:39 AM) [snapback]1282055[/snapback]
this is actually called antepardom depression and is more common then not. if you are in a depressive state for any length of time than you are putting those angels in your belly at risk. we, as twin mommies, know that preterm labor is all but given and adding depression and/or anxiety to the mix makes it all the more possible to go into pre preterm labor, which is not good for babies.

going through pregnancy untreated for depression can lead to behavioral problems, cognetive issues, possible mental health problems and of course preterm labor in babies. so in MOST cases it is best to seek the advice of a professional, therapist or psychiatrist, because more often then not the benefits of treating the depression and anxiety far outway the risks involved to the fetus.

now having said that, therapy can be a wonderful tool to help you through your depression but if persistant crying,, over a week continually, and/or suicidal thoughts become an issue you definetly need to seek medical options with drug therapy. the risk to the unborn babies, especially if passed your first trimester, are minimal. so i encourage you to find a doctor within your insurance plan that can help you. there are MANY antidepressant medications available to pregnant women that pose little to no risk to the fetus.

it's not healthy for you OR the babies to spend the entire pregnancy depressed. untreated antepardom depression is often a strong indicator that one will develop postpardom depression. so it's best to nip this in the bud now rather than wait until the babies arrive and you are too depressed to care for them or yourself.

i wish you the best of luck and belive me, i know exactly what you are going through. everytime a woman tells me that pregnancy was the happiest most joyful time in their lives i want to smack them and run away. i'm 22 weeks tomorrow and have not been a happy camper throughout my entire pregnancy but i'm seeking help and treatment. and my peri assured me that taking medications (within certain liminitations) is OK as i am passed the crucial developmental stages of pregnancy. what i am doing, by treating my depression now is saving my babies from future disaster, i.e. postpardom depression.

so again, best of luck and i hope you can find treatment soon! :hug:

The first thing I highlighted is just a false statement. I know several people that have gone 40 weeks with twins and being that full term for twins is considered to be 36-37 weeks, I would venture a guess that even most people these days go full term with their twins. It is not even close that pre-term labor is a given.

I think that the OP needs support but to jump from that to telling her she will harm her child if she doesn't receive treatment is just cruel and may make her more upset.

Please be careful to post such inflamitory false statements.

 

QUOTE
The first thing I highlighted is just a false statement. I know several people that have gone 40 weeks with twins and being that full term for twins is considered to be 36-37 weeks, I would venture a guess that even most people these days go full term with their twins. It is not even close that pre-term labor is a given.

I think that the OP needs support but to jump from that to telling her she will harm her child if she doesn't receive treatment is just cruel and may make her more upset.

Please be careful to post such inflamitory false statements.


wasn't trying to malicious in anyway what so ever. i was just stating information that was given to my by my health care providers and research that i have done on this issue. yes it is very dangerous to you and your unborn child if you suffer from depression, especially if the symptoms include suicidal ideation and the sort. i was merely trying to point out the dangers associated with not seeking treatment, via medicinal or theraputic. if you are sad for any consecutive weeks/months or even days and see no relief in sight you owe it to yourself to see treatment.

and unfortunately the risks to the fetus are high when dealing with mental illness during pregnancy. that's just a fact.

i wasn't trying to be mean or say something negative. i was just trying to help.....i guess i didn't succeed in what i was trying to do.

i'm sorry for that.

the bottom line, if you are depressed/unhappy you shouldn't have to suffer. that's all i was trying to get across. i'm sorry you and possibly others took what i said the wrong way.

 

QUOTE(BlessedThistle @ Apr 19 2009, 09:46 PM) [snapback]1280405[/snapback]
I thought this would be the happiest time of my life. It's not. My life is in tumult and as I have posted before, I am having a really hard time being excited about twins as a single mom. If you've dealt with depression, how did you handle it? I hate to take drugs while pregnant. The psychotherapist recommended to me charges $250/visit. I don't know what to do to lift myself out of this.


:hug: 's I'm so sorry you're going through this. I felt depressed on and off throughout my pregnancy. About 8 weeks of it (from week 20-28) was honestly the hardest time of my entire life. I was in the hospital, dilated, and felt for sure that we were going to lose these precious babies. I daily felt as if my whole world was falling apart. I didn't take anything for depression, but I did take something to help me sleep and I think that made a big difference. The other things that helped me were to lean heavily on people on my life that were positive and encouraging - my DH, my parents, my peri, the kind nurses, women I met online in similar situations. It was a daily mental battle and I really am so sorry to hear that you are going through this. I don't think people on the outside can often see how painful depression can be. I tried really hard to keep a routine; get dressed every day, open up the blinds in my room and let the sun in, I looked constantly for success stories (maybe you could look for moms in your situation who have BTDT - don't know if that would help or not), and tried to just take it day by day. I hated it when people would say that to me, but in reality it's all I could handle. The future seemed so bleak and so overwhelming that it was really all I could do to take it day by day. I also wanted to make you aware that depression during pregnancy puts you at a greater risk for post-partum depression. That's probably a no-brainer for you, but for some reason it didn't even occur to me. I finally figured out that I had PPD at like 5 months and it made a world of difference. Anyhow, I just wanted to give you encouragement and let you know that I did not seek treatment for depression during my pregnancy (didn't even know I was depressed) and my babies are happy, healthy 10 month olds. Take care of yourself and please vent anytime

 

I was not aware that I was depressed (actually more like anxious) while pregnant, but I think I was. I never looked forward to having the babies at all, except in the sense that I wanted them OUT of my body. I was so terrified of what it would be like, I couldn't enjoy the anticipation very much. But I tend towards anxiety anyway, and it wasn't that much beyond my normal level, so I didn't realize how pervasive it was until they were born and I tipped over into PPD.

Is there any kind of a pregnancy/depression support group you could go to? There must be some options other than medication or a really expensive doctor. When I had PPD, I saw a counselor (not an MD). My health plan covered her, so I only paid $15 a session, but I'm sure her regular rates were less than $250.

Also, FWIW, this is just anecdotal, but my sister took antidepressants during part of all of her 3 pregnancies, and all her kids are just fine. She and her doctor made a decision together that it was worth the risk for the benefit of the mother. While I don't think you should freak out about potential harm to your babies as a result of being depressed, you do have the right to think of your own happiness and emotional stability. :hug:

 

QUOTE
Also, FWIW, this is just anecdotal, but my sister took antidepressants during part of all of her 3 pregnancies, and all her kids are just fine. She and her doctor made a decision together that it was worth the risk for the benefit of the mother. While I don't think you should freak out about potential harm to your babies as a result of being depressed, you do have the right to think of your own happiness and emotional stability. hug99.gif


yes often times if you talk to your OB/GYN she/him will prescribe you something along the lines of low dose prozac (usually 20mg) and then refer you to a psychiatrist. MOST anti-depressants are OK to take once you are past the first trimester. the big no no *i believe* is paxil (at least that is what my peri told me). if your symptoms persist please talk to your OB/GYN about it. He/She may be able to point you in the right direction. I have known MANY women who have taken anti-depressants and other psychiatrict medications throughout their ENTIRE pregnancy and had beautiful healthy bouncing babies at delivery. so don't be afraid to ask for treatment if you feel like you can't handle this alone.

and support groups are GREAT but often times only meet once a month and sometimes we need someone to lean on far more often then that. check with your insurance provider for a good therapist (if you feel you need to of course) and see if you can come in for weekly visits.

by talking to others you will often find that your feelings are completely normal, we just don't want to see you in distress any longer than necessary.

again, best of luck!!!!!!!

 

Holy Moly, I wasn't the original posting but I have to say I am sending out the warmest heartfelt love to all of you who have replied!!!!

As I sat at my computer late last night sobbing sending these thoughts out there I had no idea what could come back.

It's encouraged me to seek more support. I need a counselor and for the people in my life to know that i am up late at night crying. I can't go through this alone. It's got to get better.

Blessed Thistle, I'm here too for you.

 

:grouphug:

I had actually been depressed for most of my life and didn't know it, and the hormones of pregnancy just magnified it, and sent me spiraling down into a major depression. I was hospitalized for a week because of it. My doctors eventually put me on meds because I was unable to pull out of it with therapy alone(and btw it was Paxil and I do have a healthy 12 year old! although it is not on the recommended list today). There are safe medications to take while you are pregnant, and there are several different therapy options available as well.

You all that posted(and those that are lurking :spy: ) are not alone. Depression is a chemical imbalance in the brain, and requires treatment like any other illness(think diabetes). There is no reason to suffer when there are safe treatments/therapies out there.

Also, we do have a Mental Health forum here at TS! PM me for info. It's a great source of support.

:grouphug:

 

I just wish all of you ladies who do suffer with depression a lot of :hug:

 

Last summer, I lost a good friend due to postpartum depression. She started getting depressed the last 2 months of her pregnancy but hid it really well from her friends. That is one of the demons of depression & anxiety (you hide it for different reasons, one of which you don't want people to think that you cannot care for your baby and they might take baby away or you are unstable, etc.)....so she did go to her doctor and started taking antidepressants. She did not share her feelings with anyone...her family knew some but not all. So her baby was born and she did not bond with her. She was falling deeper into depression. Her family realized it. It was hidden from her friends and the community. She opened up to no one. When her baby was 3 months old, she abruptly stopped taking her medication and she went 100% into herself....my friend then committed suicide. I feel if she had reached out in the beginning, started talking and drawing on a social network, this could have been a different outcome.

I had PPD with my first boy. I did not tell anyone, not even my husband. It took me a year of silent suffering and fighting it (unwanted and intrusive thought/images, very low feelings/ anxious, feeling like i was going crazy, etc). This time however, I"m sharing my story and telling my doctors and my friends and I have mental health services phone number posted near my phone. I will share my feelings if I feel depression/anxiety starting to set in.

If you are feeling any of this - even a touch of it, share it with someone. Talk to a trusted friend. Talk to your doctor. Talk to your minister. You will come out of it with help from your social newtwork.

I just wanted to share my story (not to scare anyone) so you can realize how important it is not to suffer in silence.

BIG HUGS to you and this is a good post - opening up the doors of communication for this is very very very important.

 

The best way to get over stress and depression is to take a break from your regular schedule, go out, and take good sleep. This helps in clearing the mind and try consulting a specialist who can suggest you as how you can get over your problem. There are various prescription drugs to get over anxiety and depression, but these should only be used in accordance with the instruction of a physician. There is a lot of fake selling of such medicines on internet, so before you can order it online just make sure it is a real pharmacy.

 

I have not experienced this myself, but my sister went through it with her second child. I would strongly suggest going through the therapist/psychiatrist route before trying any drugs. My sister was on aid and could not afford a psychiatrist, so her OB gave her Lexapro samples. They helped a little but her baby was born with nystagmus, which is his eyes jump back and forth very fast and he has not control over them. He will have this his entire life, there is nothing they can do for it. The muscles around his eyes also were not developed so he has had two surgeries so far to correct them but still cannot see well. He is 3 at this point and doesn't let it get in his way but we will not know if he will be able to play sports or drive when he gets older. Make sure your therapist is the one to prescribe you pills because they will know the most about the different drugs. My sister's OB just gave her what was free laying around the office. Lexapro now has lots of cases reported with birth defects.

I am not trying to scare you, I just know my sister regrets everyday that she took those pills without any real research or knowledge. At that point she was just so desperate, she was willing to try anything. You are already taking steps by looking for support here. Good luck, I hope you find something or someone that gets you over this hump. HUGS

 

QUOTE(KristenLee @ May 12 2009, 08:13 AM) [snapback]1309947[/snapback]
I am not trying to scare you, I just know my sister regrets everyday that she took those pills without any real research or knowledge.

While I agree that research and knowledge are very important, I wouldn't be so quick to blame the pills for any problems. Nystagmus has many causes so there is absolutely no way of knowing exactly what caused it. I doubt the OB just 'gave her what was lying around' without putting some thought into the risks for both the baby AND the mom had she not been treated.

In a perfect world of course no one would take meds while pregnant, but sometimes that is not possible.

QUOTE
BIG HUGS to you and this is a good post - opening up the doors of communication for this is very very very important.


I agree Little June Bug! Thanks so much for sharing your story. I'm so sorry about your friend. :hug: