another uncomfortable comment question

How do you handle it when your kids start calling people fat?

The other day, leaving school, Ivy said (loudly), "Nicholas' mommy is really fat!" And we were about 8 feet behind her at the time. :gah: She didn't mean it in a bad way, it was the same as commenting on someone's sweater, but still, I wanted to crawl in a hole and die!

I took her aside and told her that it's not nice to say that. I tried to tell her that people come in different sizes and that's ok, but that you shouldn't call someone fat because sometimes people who are overweight are frustrated about it and you might hurt their feelings. I really don't know if that was the right thing to say, or if it made any sense to her. How do you handle stuff like this?

 

It sounds to me like you handled it just perfectly. I have said much the same thing to my kids in the past. Kids are (unfortunately sometimes) just super honest & say whatever pops into their heads. Hopefully, most people understand that & don't let it hurt their feelings.

 

oh boy, I'm sure that day will come for all of us. I also wonder if there's a cute children's book that goes along with what you described, so that you can practice at home what to say and not say. you did a great job.

 

I agree with the others in that you handled it well. I would have wanted to crawl in a hole, too! ardon: I am sure my embarrasing moment is coming though. <_< Isn't it some sort of parent rite of passage?

 

The other day one of mine stated (in front of our exterminator who is african american) that she did not want any "brown people" to pick her up. Later on, I talked to her about it and asked her why ... we are caucasion but have no prejudice against any other race ... she said that once I told her that she should not ever go with strangers only family and that brown people are not family. It is like she was associating the color of skin with who she was related to and who she was not ... so, obviously, she was not trying to be mean but only trying to talk in the context of her understanding ... still, I felt terrible ... our exterminator is such a sweet soft-hearted man. He loves to chat with them when he comes ... I hope he will not feel uncomfortable now! Ah ... so I know how you feel ... I didn't really know what to say either ... because I don't want her to go with strangers whether they are white or "brown" =)