And the fighting has started!

:gah: I just want to scream!!! The boys have been arguing and arguing and arguing (you get the pic). I thought they'd been fighting recently but had never actually caught them...until tonight. They were arguing over the STUPID video game and then they actually started fighting. I yelled at them to stop and separated them. I made them do some chores and then do their reading (they usually do a half hour of reading but tonight it was almost an hour!). They said they want to be in separate rooms now. UGH!! We do have a third bedroom but it's full of all kinds of junk, it's our storage and game room. I just don't know what to do with them to make them stop talking so mean to each other, telling on each other, and arguing ALL THE TIME.

 

Wow, you made it to 11 without the constant fighting? I think that's pretty good. :laughing:
Mine fight constantly, about everything. And it does turn into physical altercations. I only intervene when someone gets hurt, and then they both get punished. But works even better is to punish the item they were fighting over. If they can't work out taking turns, whatever, then the game goes in time out for a day or two. Works like a charm.

Maybe I'll feel different when they're are older, bigger and able to really hurt each other. But I wouldn't give them their own room based on what I see as natural sibling fighting. My brother and I tried to kill each other (ok, slight exaggeration), but my parents didn't cater to those fights. In your position, I would try to help them work through their fighting. Separation would be an absolute last resort.
And then the fighting will really begin...over who gets to keep what toy in his own room.

 

LOL, I'm pretty sure I agree with that. Be glad you made it this far, I've about had it with my two, and I'm blaming most of their fights on two girls entering puberty. LOL


These two are AWFUL when it comes to fighting. They know how to push each others buttons, and just when to do it as well. Like when one or the other is overtired, or hungry or just plain hormonally cranky. I often let them argue it out, but lately its been getting physical, extremely physical. Holly has bruises, and Cassie has scratch marks from the fights that happen before I get to them to intervene. They are sneaky and start these fights out of eyesight.

I feel for you, I really do, but I have no answers for you. If I figure something out I'll let you know. There are times when I consider letting them go at it until blood erupts, but then I remember just how strong Cassie is, especially when she gets mad. She could put both Holly and I in the ER. I do try to separate them when things get physical, but not when they are just arguing. I have also been known to take things they are fighting about away. When they get real bad, I take away priviledges and call Daddy. So far he has backed me up in discipline decisions.

 

Ok, well, first off...I'm SO glad to find out we're not the only ones dealing with this. I don't really want to separate them (mostly b/c I don't want to have to clean out that room...LOL!!). And, I guess if I remember back, my sister and I used to fight and my step-sister and I had some serious knock-down-drag-out fights too (and then were best friends 15 mins later).

 

I don't know if this would work at this age but if I see my girls fighting over one toy it becomes mine till I decided to give it back.

 

You are fortunate to have made it to age 11. My 6 yr old girls s have been fighting since they were old enough to fight! And my 12 yr old dd torments the younger ones, or picks one to gang up on the other. Honestly, there are days when I come home from work and want to go back to work. It's pretty sad. Sadder still since it is all about petty stuff.

I have recently decided that when they fight, they all go to their rooms until they settle down.

If they fight about a toy, I just take it away.