Am I paying enough attention to them?

Call me paranoid but sometimes I feel like I am not paying enough attention to our girls. I talk & sing to them constantly; we play a lot when they are awake; we try to stimulate them with toys and stuff; they spend lots of time on their activity mat etc. But sometimes when I feed them I am watch tv at the same time. Then there are some other times that they are wide awake in their boppy just looking around while I am getting stuff done (making forumla etc). I hate that I can't play with them every waking moment. I sometimes feel like this is going to affect their development. Does this make sense? Am I just worrying too much?

 

Call me paranoid but sometimes I feel like I am not paying enough attention to our girls. I talk & sing to them constantly; we play a lot when they are awake; we try to stimulate them with toys and stuff; they spend lots of time on their activity mat etc. But sometimes when I feed them I am watch tv at the same time. Then there are some other times that they are wide awake in their boppy just looking around while I am getting stuff done (making forumla etc). I hate that I can't play with them every waking moment. I sometimes feel like this is going to affect their development. Does this make sense? Am I just worrying too much?

 

I feel the same way.... Is this normal feelings to have?

 

Give your self a break -- the babies just want to be with you so if htey are watching you do things, that's interacting with them. There are tons of things to feel guilty of as a mom of twins, I wouldn't kill yourself on this one.

I do find that my babies are much happier when I spend time playing with them and when they ahve some time to play by themselves. mine are just 5 months and one of my boys is getting very clingy now, so, enjoy that you can get away while you can.

Enjoy!

Teri D

 

Well, you have to run the house and babies are amused by what we think is boring, like just looking around. It sounds like you are doing a wonderful job. Singing, reading books to them, pointing out things, looking at family pictures. You can only do so much of all this in any one day and still get dinner on the table.

 

I'm a firm believer in independent play, so at each of their wake times (there are 4 for us), they get about 20 minutes where I don't interact with them. I try to keep them super close together so they don't feel totally alone - they really don't like that! I putter/clean/read within close distance, but not eyeshot.

 

It is as important for you to have your time to get stuff done and some time watching tv and doing other things for you as it is for them to have play time with you. They also need time without you to learn to entertain themselves. You don't want them solely dependent on you for entertainment. They need this as much as you do. I know I am a better mom when I take a little while for myself occasionally. Don't worry you are doing a great job!

 

I feel the same way sometimes too, but than I realize that I have to get things around the house done or they don't eat or have any clothes. Believe me the kids aren't lacking any attention and I doubt yours are either.

 

Ditto

Ii mentioned this to DH the other day because I felt bad about it. He said that I too need time to myself and they will let me know if they need something.

 

I feel exactly the same way (and feel guilty about my tv watching too). But it sounds like you interact and talk with yours constantly like I do, so I bet they are getting what they need. And like pp, they need to be able to be alone a bit, and would probably be on overload if mommy was in their face all day long.

 

It sounds as if you are doing a fine job of interacting with them. You need some kind of break too!

 

I felt the same way at the time. Everything was so overwhelming and chaotic in the first 6 months. Trust me, you will have lots of time to give them tons of attention later when things have calmed down. You have to take some time for yourself, so please don't feel guilty.