We went out for the day to see a boat race that DH loves and he wanted me to come along so we had the MIL look after the twins for the day. We went to pick them up that evening 5pm. My son who is 3 months old was standing in a walker, in front of the TV. They told us he'd been there for an hour, really quiet!! I picked him up out of it (his arms were stuck down by his sides) and he was soo tired that his eyes were rolling around in his head!! WTH!!!! Then they showed me a pic of my daughter and said that she had been in the jolly jumper (those things that you hang from the door), she loved it - she was in it for about an hour. OMG. I dont want my twins STANDING for an hour at 3 months old!!!!!!!!!!!!!! isn't that bad for them??? I am not leaving them there again. Next thing you know they'll be feeding them solids.
I can see why you are supset. At that age it isn't good on thier legs for them to stand for that length of time. I certainly wouldn't want to take my babies over there again, but maybe DH can talk with them about it. It's always a sticky situation when dealing with the Inlaws, good luck!
Well if it were me, I wouldnt be impressed. Over-react? As mothers.... thats our job. Who else is going to do it if we dont? :unsure:
I don’t think you are over reacting at all. I would be mad as H*** if my MIL did that, and because she refuses to follow directions with my older DS she has never been allowed to have any of them by herself. If they are reasonable people I would try having you DH talk to them first but if they are like my MIL and would probably blow you off then by all means go with the never again. My babies are only a days older then yours and I haven’t even put them in their stand up toys yet let alone leaving them in them my poor DS would be beyond fried especially adding in the TV. I know it is hard when in laws are involved but even me (being a push over) would put my foot down on this one. Good luck, let me know how it turns out.
That sounds like way too long to me. Are they the kind of people you can talk to about your concerns? I think sometimes people out of the baby loop are less aware of the appropriate ages and stages for things than we who are actively dealing with their stages on a daily basis. I realized that when we had my DH's aunt stay with us when the babies were three weeks. She completely overstimulated our DS, and I just couldn't get it through her head that being in his face all the time was irritating him. Now at almost three months, if she were here, her same behavior would probably have him cooing and smiling up a storm. I think she just didn't have the same awareness that I have. So...not knowing the ins and outs of your situation...perhaps you can have a talk with them about age-appropriate activities?
You have every right to be upset and as a mom you can NEVER be over-reacting. I will never leave my kids there again. I take my kids with me everywhere and if they can come and dad cant babysit then I dont go. It is a small sacrifice for a short time.
QUOTE(joannabug @ Feb 12 2008, 12:14 AM) [snapback]617372[/snapback] That sounds like way too long to me. Are they the kind of people you can talk to about your concerns? I think sometimes people out of the baby loop are less aware of the appropriate ages and stages for things than we who are actively dealing with their stages on a daily basis. I realized that when we had my DH's aunt stay with us when the babies were three weeks. She completely overstimulated our DS, and I just couldn't get it through her head that being in his face all the time was irritating him. Now at almost three months, if she were here, her same behavior would probably have him cooing and smiling up a storm. I think she just didn't have the same awareness that I have. So...not knowing the ins and outs of your situation...perhaps you can have a talk with them about age-appropriate activities? That's what I think too. I wouldn't be happy about it, but maybe you could talk to them about it? I wish my in-laws would be willing to babysit, they only live 1 hour away but would NEVER babysit my girls.
Okay, my boys are coming up for a year old so I may be a touch more relaxed about these things...and based on the previous posts I think I may be the odd one out. I hope I don't offend you when I say that in my opinion you are overreacting. I had mine in the exersaucer and Jolly Jumper at 4 months old. I don't know if they ever made it a full hour at a time, but over the course of a day I bet they got an hour each or more. TV has never been a part of our routine/activities. My kids had plagio, despite my best efforts, so I had to keep them off of their heads 100% of their awake time (other than diaper changes). I couldn't even really use bouncy chairs. So it was my arms, the exersaucer, the Jolly Jumper, the bumbos, my mother's arms (when she could stop by for an hour or two)...sort of like a baby circus. My boys have great leg muscles and head control. James has been walking since 10 months and Evan is just about to start as far as we can tell (11 months). I think that the exersaucer and Jolly Jumper had the unexpected effect of helping them to gain strength and develop well. When people are looking after my kids, I reduce my expectations. When I'm with my boys I have 100 tricks that I've learned over the last 11 months to keep them happy. I am really busy the entire time - playing, feeding, changing, soothing, working hard! But I've built up this energy level over months and months. So I tend to give other people somewhat of a break when they're kind enough to watch the babies. My husband taught me to let go a little. Nobody is going to do as good a job as I do...but if they're alive and relatively unbruised at the end of the day, and they've been fed and watered...I'm grateful. One unusual day isn't going to have any long-term detrimental effect on your babies (I'm assuming your in laws aren't abusive of course...your husband seems to have turned out well?). Does your husband consider his parents good people?
I can understand why you are upset. You should have DH talk to them about age-appropriate toys. Some people just forget or have amnesia about what little babies can and cannot do.
QUOTE(PgTimesTwo @ Feb 12 2008, 05:32 AM) [snapback]617514[/snapback] That's what I think too. I wouldn't be happy about it, but maybe you could talk to them about it? I wish my in-laws would be willing to babysit, they only live 1 hour away but would NEVER babysit my girls. I agree. My kids could barely hold their heads up for any extended amount of time at that age! The lack of judgement there is quite scary but maybe they could be "taught"? Would dh talk to them?
"Nobody is going to do as good a job as I do...but if they're alive and relatively unbruised at the end of the day, and they've been fed and watered...I'm grateful." This made me chuckle
I don't think you over reacted and I don't think my kids were ever in a walker/jumper/exersaucer for more than 20 minutes at any age. At 3 months old I let them sit in it for seconds (It was their christmas present) but we had blankets around them and their legs were not extended. My MIL is awesome but she really doesn't remember how things are done and she's never babysat.
QUOTE(joannabug @ Feb 12 2008, 01:14 AM) [snapback]617372[/snapback] That sounds like way too long to me. Are they the kind of people you can talk to about your concerns? I think sometimes people out of the baby loop are less aware of the appropriate ages and stages for things than we who are actively dealing with their stages on a daily basis. I realized that when we had my DH's aunt stay with us when the babies were three weeks. She completely overstimulated our DS, and I just couldn't get it through her head that being in his face all the time was irritating him. Now at almost three months, if she were here, her same behavior would probably have him cooing and smiling up a storm. I think she just didn't have the same awareness that I have. So...not knowing the ins and outs of your situation...perhaps you can have a talk with them about age-appropriate activities? I agree with this and alot of what CHJH posted, while it def wasn't appropriate for them to have left them in there for so long, I wouldn't be surprised if they weren't of the thought process that the babies were happy where they were so why change it?
