Am I Making a Mistake?

This is my 2nd post about sleep in 2 days. Can you tell I'm exhausted?

As I mentioned in my other post, my girls are only 3 weeks old so I know that I still have a way to go before they are STTN.

However, my question now is about following the advice to "wake the other twin to feed when the first wakes up."

This seems to be common advice and makes sense. We've been following it and when one girl wakes up to eat we wake and feed the other. I'm starting to wonder if this is a mistake though. Am I teaching them to wake more often?

Any thoughts or experiences?

 

at this point in the game, you are not teaching them anything or creating any bad habits that will be hard to break later. as they get older and start sleeping more you can reevaluate waking the other twin to feed but right now i think that it is a vital survival technique! i can almost guarantee you that if you didn't wake the sleeping twin, she would probably wake up on her own to be fed right after you had fallen back asleep! which will not help you get any more rest.... i always woke the sleeper until they started sleeping through at 12 weeks.

i know it seems hard to believe right now, but they will start going longer stretches soon and all of your sleepless nights will be a fuzzy memory! you can make it!!

 

Personally, I don't think you're making a mistake! That's what I do, too. While it *may* make them wake more often, I think it's more likely that you'll get more sleep because you aren't waking every hour due to totally different sleep schedules! My boys are now almost 6 weeks and they are now waking up almost at the same time, so their schedules are pretty much the same (VERY nice!). It's rare that I have to wake the other one up - he does it himself about 10 minutes into my feeding session with the first one. We're now down to 2 feedings at night: one at midnight-1:00-ish and the second at 3:00-4:00-ish. Very rare that it's more than that.

 

We did that until I was consistently waking the same twin. Then we started letting him sleep longer.

 

I did the wake one after the other woke because if I didn't I would get 10 mins of sleep/rest before the other would wake up to eat. It was even more exhausting than I could have imagined! Hang in there, just a few more weeks!

 

I had them up around the same time especially during those first few weeks, because if I didn't I would have not gotten any rest (I did nights by myself because DH works the night shift). For us that worked out really well and they eventually started going longer at night together and started STTN around 10 weeks or so. I don't think you are teaching them a bad habit at all.

 

getting them in the habit of eating at the same time now is going to save your sanity later on. i tried feeding them individually, but you will find that you will get less alone time and less things done this way. it seemed like my whole day was devoted to feeding babies if i did that way.

if one of my girls is still sleeping when it's time to eat i will let them sleep no longer than 15 minutes that way it doesn't throw the whole day off as far as feeding and sleeping.

you're not doing anything wrong. even if you didn't wake the sleeping baby to eat they would probably wake up soon anyway. you're totally in the thick of it now. the first 3 months are the worst as far as getting enough sleep goes. hang in there and this will all pay off very soon.

 

We did that too and I don't think it's a mistake. I also don't think you're teaching them to wake more often, just a different times to make your life more bearable.

It really is easier in the end. Hang in there and stop doubting yourself!

 

That’s what we did, because they were bottle-fed and were told by the NICU nurses to never use props of any kind, or feed both at the same time, because it was a choking hazard for bottle-fed babies.



So whichever one got hungry 1[sup]st[/sup], the other one got woken up next and fed.



The main reason we did this- to try to avoid two crying hungry babies at the same time. It worked most of the time. The times it didn’t sucked.

 

I still wake the other one up if they don't wake up on their own(which they usually do). My boys are 9 months old and still don't sleep through the night. We only have to get up with them once though around 4 am. I tried to let them truly demand but it is way to exhausting and we were up all the time. Hang in there

 

Add me to the list of "been there done that". It really works better because now my babies are on the exact same eating schedule, otherwise I'd be constantly feeding one baby or the other one. They were STTN by 3 months at least 7 hrs, and by 3.5 months it was 10 hrs, and by 4 months it was 11-12 hrs. I don't think it taught them anything except to get their internal clocks on the same schedule!! :hug:

 

We would always wake them both up to eat at the same time. There were a few times when my DD would sleep an extra 20 minutes or so while I fed my DS. I would think "maybe I shouldn't wake her" and just as I finished that thought, she'd wake up and start screaming! So for us, it just worked out better that way. At 9 weeks she started sleeping about 6 or 7 hour stretches and because her weight was good I didn't wake her up. I did continue to wake up with DS until he was 4 1/2 months when he woke me up. Hang in there and if you can, sleep when they sleep during the day. I know it's hard to do but it helps.

 

I don't think you are either. I can't imagine doing it any other way, we definately synchronised their eating habits. I didn't like waking whoever was asleep initially but once everoyne is fed and tucked back up you can guarantee another few hours sleep for you. Eventually it will be where they both wake around the same time and you cant feed them quick enough lol
You will get to sleep again honestly just keep doing your best and sleep when they do if you can!!

 

I always fed them at the same time.

 

I've started feeding mine at the same time when my mother left home, when they were 4 months old. Also, we were feeding them at the same time or one after the other during the night, so we could get some sleep. Otherwise, the other one will wake up after an hour or so and I would go on feeding babies all night. They were on a 3-4 hour schedule during the night and 3 hours during the day. Once I started lengthening the time between feedings they started going longer during the night(this was around 4.5 months). Now they are STTN, but sometimes one would wake up for a bottle during the night, and I'm no longer waking the other one.
When they are so young as yours are I thing that keeping them on the same feeding schedule during the night will help you get some sleep. It's hard to sleep 1-2 hours stretches and function to take care of 2 newborn babies. In time they will go longer during the night, they will drop one feeding and maybe in time also STTN. For now just do whatever you can to get some sleep.

 

Don't worry! I totally understand your exhaustion! My twins are 9 weeks now, and we wake both when we feed them. The first few weeks I was not entirely sure I was going to make it. LOL. But, they are totally sleeping longer stretches at night now, like 5 hour blocks. They are also awake more during the day (and still eat about every 2.5-3 hours during the day). It is so nice to sleep a consecutive five hours though. I haven't had that since about the second trimester!