always being called "twins"

ok..silly question...but
my side of the family always referrs to them by their names, where dh's side is always
"the twins"
and when we are out, of course you get the question "are they twins"? and the begins all the
comparisons..
ds and dd are NOTHING alike, I always say that the only thing they have in common is their date
of birth.
I sometimes get upset from strangers with the "chubby" comments of dd. They eat about the same
but their metabolism is complety different and ds is very active so he burns a lot more energy...
I just see them as brother and sister and I wish others would to and not try to compare all the time.
Just because they are twins does not mean they have to be/act/look the same. KWIM?

 

People are always so fascinated with what makes twins "twins". Mine look nothing alike, but since they are both boys, I get the "are they identical" question a lot. I want to be so obnoxious some times, but I bite my tongue and answer nicely. Even though twins are much more common these days, they are still something new to most people. They are a phenomenon that are worth inquiring about. Some people will compare their lives to what they would imagine yours to be like with twins. That drives me crazy if they don't have twins. I don't imagine how it's like to raise two or more kids of different ages. i simply have no clue what that'd be like, so I don't see how anyone feels they have the right to imagine themselves in my shoes....however, I can understand and appreciate the attraction and the curiosity of it. I too have wondered what it would be like to raise one kid at a time, but I still wouldn't presume to know what it's like when trying to relate to someone else in different shoes.

I think because they are twins, I do not call them twins. I call them "My Boys." They are in fact my boys, but I don't want their identity to be based on them being twins. My family on both sides have caught on and do not refer to them as "The Twins" anymore. I don't correct them, but when I speak, I only speak of "My Boys" and not "The Twins". It seems to help other people talk about them on my terms better.

 

i've done the same thing with the same results. i model the behaviour i want to see. this really only works with people you see a lot though - there are still plenty of other people that refer to them as the twins. i always cringe a little bit on the inside, but i also feel that my girls will take their cue from me about how to react to these things and, at the end of the day, they ARE twins & that's not a bad thing. i figure it's mine & DH job to balance out the twin-tention with treating them as individuals & hopefully they'll end up nice & well-rounded. well, that's the plan... ardon:

i've also reached a point with strangers where i do a lot of nodding & smiling (or even ignoring since the girls are usually pretty good at interacting with strangers on their own now) when they start pontificating on all things twin. i used to feel a need to educate people, but now, mostly, i just want to get my shopping (or whatever) done. :laughing: if someone genuinely seems interested, i'm happy to chat more in depth, but most people just want to share what they've heard or know or think they know or tell you that their Aunt Hazel's daughter's friend's second cousin just had twins too! it can definitely be annoying but i try to remember that they aren't thinking about the fact that i've probably heard it all 10 times that day already.

 

I usually call them “the dudes”… I have no issue w/ them being called “the twins” as I have an older boy so we can’t call them the boys (when referring to just the two of them)… but I also had no issue being grouped w/ my sister and being referred to as “the girls” so maybe that’s why… I too have called them to the twins to make it easier in certain circles… but to family and close friends they are referred to as “the dudes” or “my youngest dudes”… they know I am usually referring to the twins not ALL my dudes… as even the dog is one of my dudes… I am surrounded by too much testosterone :wacko: … WAY too much :faint: …

Elizabeth

 

I don't think I care if people say "the twins", they are twins. But like pp I think people will follow what you say. I usually say "the babies" (I know.... not much longer before people are correcting me that their not babies anymore), and I notice others in my family and friends say "the babies". Now it is interesting that my neice and nephews (ages 3-8) call them by their names.


I also get stopped ALL the time!!....."Are those twins?" or they will ask how old one of them is to see what i say.

 

I'm not a big fan of the term "the twins." I'm not offended when people use it, though. I just prefer to call them "the babies" or by name.

 

I usually call mine Godzilla and Mothra :laughing: but I do have family members who either call them the twins, the cherubs, or the babies. I don't mind people calling them by either of those things.

 

We tend to refer them as the Dynamic Duo....LOL Either that or 'the babies' or 'the little boys' and the older two are the 'big boys'. Eventually they will likely be referred to as the twins at times - IE = The twins go to kindergarten this year. I won't 'label' them as the twins all the time, but its really no different than saying "the boys" or "the kids" or "the children" - yes, they're boys. Yes they're twins. Yes they're kids. yes they're children. At the end of the day they are Zachary and Lane.

 

My family doesn't refer to them as the twins...but most other people that barely know them will. When my girls went to daycare they were usually referred to as the twins. I agree with pp, it was mostly a fascination thing (they were the only twins there) and people could not tell them apart, so instead of attaching the wrong name to my girls, they just said the twins until I told them which was who. I didn't take offense but my girls would often go..twins, what's that?...because we never told them they were twins. It was kind of funny.