Almost 2 and refusing to nap--Mommy exasperated!

I'm literally at my wit's end with my two kids. It all started around Christmas time and they have been total monsters ever since.

They used to take 2 naps -- a morning and an afternoon nap for about an hour and a half each. Now I'm lucky if I get an hour out of them and it's really starting to grate on my last nerve. They are completely tired, cranky and out of control by suppper time and I can't take much more of it. Plus I'm so sick of hearing how this one's kid sleeps 3 hrs. a day and they're 2 years old!

I've tried just putting them down for an afternoon nap (then they are over-tired and can't wind down). I've tried the morning and afternoon nap like old times and all they do it play and play. My daughter has broken numerous dowels out of her crib while "playing". I'm seriously considering seperating them for naps (one in the nursery and one in a PNP in our bedroom) just to see if they'll finally take a nap.

And today I did away with the pacifers. My dd just stood up in her crib this am and whined for an hour straight b/c her paci was on the floor. It was pretty much the straw that broke the camels back and the pacis are gone!

Any one going through something similar and have any helpful advice? I'm really at the end of my rope and am starting to HATE being the SAHM with 2 cranky, overtired, whiny, bratty kids. Please help.

Holly

 

I'm literally at my wit's end with my two kids. It all started around Christmas time and they have been total monsters ever since.

They used to take 2 naps -- a morning and an afternoon nap for about an hour and a half each. Now I'm lucky if I get an hour out of them and it's really starting to grate on my last nerve. They are completely tired, cranky and out of control by suppper time and I can't take much more of it. Plus I'm so sick of hearing how this one's kid sleeps 3 hrs. a day and they're 2 years old!

I've tried just putting them down for an afternoon nap (then they are over-tired and can't wind down). I've tried the morning and afternoon nap like old times and all they do it play and play. My daughter has broken numerous dowels out of her crib while "playing". I'm seriously considering seperating them for naps (one in the nursery and one in a PNP in our bedroom) just to see if they'll finally take a nap.

And today I did away with the pacifers. My dd just stood up in her crib this am and whined for an hour straight b/c her paci was on the floor. It was pretty much the straw that broke the camels back and the pacis are gone!

Any one going through something similar and have any helpful advice? I'm really at the end of my rope and am starting to HATE being the SAHM with 2 cranky, overtired, whiny, bratty kids. Please help.

Holly

 

Can you post, Holly, what their schedule is? Like what time they wake up in the morning, what time they are going to bed, meals and snacks, too? That might help some of us try to figure out what is going on.

I know for us, between 15 and 17 months, we lost our two day nap schedule and went to just one nap a day. It changed our whole schedule for a few months (earlier lunch, nap around 11:30, bedtime was 1-2 hours earlier than before).

Also, is their room dark when they are trying to nap?

Just trying to think of different things....

 

Mine gave up naps at home when we switched to beds at 18 months, but only at home, not at daycare. On desperate days, I would put them in the car and just drive around - they always fell asleep with 10 min.

 

We put E and D to bed at night around 8 p.m. and they wake around 7:15, but sometimes as early as 6:30. If they do wake at 6:30, they stay in their cribs until 7:30-7:45.

They have breakfast around 8, and if try to lay them down for a morning nap it's usually between 10-10:30. I will leave them in their cribs for an hour regardless of whether they nap or not.

I feed them lunch around 11:30-noon and if I didn't attempt the morning nap I put them down around 1:30-2. If I attempted the morning nap and they actually did sleep (usually only an hour 20 minutes MAXIMUM is all they'll nap for PERIOD) I will still lay them down around 2:30-3.

And their room in dark. In fact, I just got rid of the mini-blinds in their room and replaced them with room-darkening blinds, thinking that might help which is hasn't.

As I mentioned in my previous post, I ditched the pacis. The afternoon nap was the first foray into sleeping without the aid of a paci and my ds screamed for 45 minutes straight, fell aspleep but only slept 30 minutes today TOTAL. My dd got about an hour nap.

I don't know what else to do. I've been careful about the level of sugar in their diets too thinking maybe they're too hyped up on sugar but they really don't have that much sugar in a day. They do get about a teaspoonful of flavoring in their milk sippies but my dd won't drink her milk without it.

I'm not ready for them to drop naps all together; they're not even 2 yet! I'm so exhausted from feeling like I'm fighting them all day long and losing the battle.

Holly

 

I would say skip the morning nap and try to get them down earlier. I am guessing that they are overtired by the time 1:30 rolls around. I've also heard some other moms on TS say that they should be in bed for their nap five hours after they wake up in the morning. So if they are awake at 6:30-7:00, they need to be fed and in bed around 11:30-noon. I would get them out of their beds when they first wake up, feed them breakfast, skip the morning snack and then do the lunch thing around 10:45-11 am. Then put them down around 11:45. Hopefully they will then sleep for an hour or two. As they get older, you can gradually push back the napping time (ours is 1-1:30 to 3-3:30). Oh, and then bedtime will be earlier, as well, by an hour or so.

I don't know what to tell you about the pacifier situation. Mine still have theirs, but only in their cribs. I guess if I were you I would be tempted to give them back to them, just another tool to help them get back to napping again. But then again, that is totally up to you...it would be great to get the naps back and have the paci's over and done with, too!

I totally agree with you that two years old is too young to not be napping anymore...for them and for YOU!! I feel for you and hope this helps. This is the advice I got when I was switching from two naps to one and it really helped us.

Let us know how it goes...

Kate

 

HOlly,

If it helps I am right there with you. My boys have litteraly fought naptime/nighttime their whole lives and they still do.

First off, I think getting rid of the paci's is a GREAT idea. It will take about a week for them to adjust, but it will help you out in the long run. If they keep crying for their paci's, don't give in. They are using them as a sleep association and need to suck to fall asleep. They need to learn to fall asleep on their own, and that's a wonderful thing you can teach them as their mother. Sooo keep that up!

Second, I would cut out the morning nap, they are probably ready for one nap. You don't get a break if they are crying and not sleeping, or even it one naps and the other doesn't. I would go for an early afternoon nap. When we started one nap a day mine were taking 2 20 min naps - if I was lucky one of them was at the same time. I hated my life at that point too. So, I would go for naptime at about 11 or 11:30. Put them down and leave them in their cribs for an hour. IF they don't fall asleep get them up and naptime is over. IF they do fall asleep (even after 59 min of crying) GREAT! Let them sleep It will probalby take some time to make this adjustment, but it will help. It might mean an earlier bedtime for a while to make up for not napping. But eventually they will figure it out. All you can do is give them the opportunity to nap and they can choose to use that time to nap, or not to nap. Eventually they will realize they need to sleep then!!

Good luck and keep us posted!

Also, I also did seperate rooms for a while for naptime (one in a pnp in the guest bedroom, and one in their crib in their room). This did help. Eventually I got them back in their same room together. Now we just have quite time, and some days they nap and some days they just scream for an hour. Augh!

 

Also, I have only had one 3 hour nap out of each of my guys. Noah's was after surgery when he had Morphine. And Joshua's was when he was in the hospital with Pneumonia and only got 5 hours of sleep the night before. So I am right there with you on the jealousy issue of long naps. Mine are 40 min nappers if they do nap, so I DO understand.

 

Mine are pretty much no longer napping at all. If they do nap, it takes them 1 1/2 to 2 hours to fall asleep. So I can sympathize. It's horrible. I sit here and get upset even though there is nothing I can do about it. It's so frustrating!

 

It sounds to me like they are good candidates for one nap. When I started having problems with two naps, I decided it was time to change. It takes a little getting used to and a lot of patience, but overall it was easier than I thought it would be. (That is usually true about change for them. I stress prior, but then it goes better than expected!!) Here is our schedule if it helps:

6:45ish-Wake up (I usually get them out of cribs by 7:00)
8:00 Breakfast
11:30 Lunch
12:00/12:15 Tyler goes down for nap
1:00 Paige goes down. She doesn't need as much sleep as Tyler. She naps in a PNP in guest room, which will be her room shortly.)
2:45/3:00 They usually both wake
5:00 Dinner
7:30 Bedtime

The nap was shorter when we first tried the one nap. You just have to stick with it and they do get used to it. For a short time, Paige would tend to fall asleep in her car seat on the way home in the mornings if we were out and about. I'd try to wake her, but usually no luck. We generally just had short trips so it was just a 10 minute nap and she woke up by the time we got in the house. Also in the beginning I tried to put her down around 12:15 like Tyler, but learned she tended to stay awake because she had to go poopy or a poopy would wake her. That is another reason I keep her up until 1:00...along with her just not ready to sleep yet.

Good luck. It was frustrating at first, but they got it.

Amy

 

I too am in the same boat. And I'm also jealous of my girlfriend who's twins sleep like 3hrs in the afternoon!!! What I could do in those 3 hrs....sigh.

My girls have been off and on with 2 naps for months now and I think after reading this post and all the responses, I'm actually cause most of my grief. I need to just suck it up and do the work (taking the time and patience to switch them to one nap). I guess I just feel that since they nap only 45 minutes, maybe, I deserve to get 2 naps! lol

I applaud you with the paci's...I'm not that brave yet, but one day, when I'm on my hands and kness searching for a paci in the dark, I'm just gonna call it QUITS!!! I hate those things! lol

You're not alone out there. I have faith that one day, we too will have a nice long break in the afternoons!

Hang in there,
Daniele

 

Thanks for all the advice mommies!

Just an FYI about naps: I did attempt the morning nap today b/c they were both up early than normal (6:15) and by 9 they were both yawning and acting tired. However, they didn't nap but I left them in their cribs to play while I got a quick shower and did some straightening up around the house.

I attempted the second nap at 1:15 and they FINALLY fell asleep around 2 and slept until 4 ! They are so much happier and so am I.

The no-pacifier thing has actually been going very well. I think my dh was a little leary of dropping the binks so soon b/c I have always said that when they turn 2 I'll drop the binks but I just felt the time was right. They still do ask for the binks at nap and last night at bed they asked for them but we explained that pacis are for babies and that they aren't babies any more.

Tomorrow I'm going to try the one-nap thing around noonish, I think. We will see how it goes.

Holly