Almost 10 Months and Still not Consistently STTN?

are we doing something wrong??

our boys are healthy and happy 9.5 mo olds who only seem to sleep through the night about once or twice a week. there is no rhyme or reason to it - we keep the bedtimes consistent and early, they get good morning and afternoon naps, they are well fed, etc. No matter what we do, ever since they were about 5 months old, their previous STTN days seem to be behind them once more. We can get them back to sleep, but it takes a while, and sometimes they get up multiple times. 99% of the time, they are NOT hungry. We have fed DS 1 a bottle a few times when it became aparrent that was why he was up.

We do modified CIO techniques but do not let them cry for too long as it always wakes the other one up (if they are not up already!)

Is this normal? I mean, it is definitely normal for OUR kids...Just hoping it is so we can feel better about ourselves as parents!

:search:

 

we are in the same boat. I hope someone has some answers. Because MOMMA IS TIRED

 

Our boys did not STTN until 9.5 months. After 9 months of not sleeping through a single night, and trying every sleep method I could get my hands on, I finally gave in and we did modified CIO (DH would have done it much sooner but I resisted until I really got to the end of my rope). We went in at intervals and comforted them with out picking them up, and increased the intervals each night. It took about two weeks to really get things under control, but now they consistently go down on their own and sleep through from 8pm to 7am. I think each child is different and you are not doing anything wrong, so please don't feel that way!

 

Our boys were really bad for getting up in the middle of the night at about that age. I think they just figured out that they COULD get up and that mommy and daddy were not far away. They weren't really hungry.. they'd nurse for 2 minutes and then just want to hang out. Eventually we were losing our minds being up all the time and resorted to CIO. It was the best decision we ever made! When they woke up, we'd go and check that everything was ok, give them a pat, replace soothers and leave. Sometimes they woke their brother up, but not often.

It took a couple of weeks for them to consistently sleep through, but it was worth the effort. Once they were STTN they were better behaved during the day and naps started to fall into place a lot better and of course we were a lot more relaxed and happy too.

And yes, it's 100% normal and has nothing to do with your parenting skills whatsoever! But don't be afraid to put a stop to it if you're too tired to deal with it.

 

We didn't have this problem with the boys. They sttn at six months old, after we did a night of CIO. Annabella was a different story. She was clearly capable of sttn on her own-and had. She seemed to go a few days, to a few weeks of doing so, and then stop. I never really did CIO with her. I don't know why. There was one of her, I couldn't stand to hear her cry, she was my last one, I don't know. She pretty much started doing it *consistently* by 11/12 months old. Oh, and she consistently would eat a full bottle too, whereas the boys didn't.

I don't think it says anything about you as parents. I'm sure you are doing an awesome job! Are they doing anything new? Do they know mommy/daddy are going to come in if they keep crying?

We did CIO with both boys in the room at the same time. And even now at 3.5, they still sleep through each others screams. It would take getting used to, but they will learn to ignore it/sleep through it. But, it is a double edged sword because you don't want two awake babies! I let them cry at bedtime, but naptime, if one woke earlier, I usually grabbed him if I could tell he wasn't going back to sleep.

:hug:

 

10 months was the turning point for us. It was quite draining considering our oldest was STTN by 5 months. The twins took their sweet time. Actu

 

we had to do full CIO at 8 months due to multiple night wakings for several months. One twins crying did disturb the other twin but never actuall caused the other twin to cry herself, although she may have been awake.

If waking the other baby is the only reason you are doing a modified CIO, then I would try the full, "real" CIO. IMO cry it out doesn't work unless you actually let them "cry it out". If you go in there after a certain period of time then they expect that you are coming and don't attemp to self soothe and just wait for you.

good luck, it does get better!

 

I had the same problem until I resorted to CIO. I hated to do it but I was exhausted. The modified CIO has never worked though. If one woke up I had to just let her cry until she went back to sleep. If I went in to check on her, she would get even worse. I can't let her see me or she'll never go back to sleep. However, like pp I only do this at night and they have learned to sleep through each others cries. I do not do it at naps because it just doesn't work.

You might try one night just letting them cry without going in. Maybe yours are like mine and if they see you it just intensifies the crying.

 

Just so you feel better, my girls didn't consistently STTN until about 20 months old. I define STTN longer than eight hours. There are actually a lot of us out there like this, just no one ever brags about NOT sleeping!

We only did CIO for going to bed, not the middle of the night. I also nursed until right around then. Maybe if either of those were different, they might have slept differently, but we did what was best, in our mind, for our family.

Good luck and I hope you get sleep soon!

 

Thanks, all!

It is good to know we are not alone.

I like YooperMom's quote: "There are actually a lot of us out there like this, just no one ever brags about NOT sleeping!"


:grouphug:


my boys have been sleeping better the past two nights....we'll see how long it lasts ha ha!

Oh well, still love 'em to pieces!

 

I just want to add that my girls are almost 16 months and not consistently STTN either. I guess sometimes the parents get lucky and with other kids they don't.

 

I think it's really, really normal for kids to not be sleeping through the night at that age. Sadly, most parents don't like to admit it.
Ours were still waking sometimes up until they were a year. After all, many adults don't sleep through the night.

We never did CIO as it is something we are opposed to for our family. However, I did find a lot of great tips in the book the No Cry SLeep Solution. Good luck! And it's totally NOT just your kids. I think it's probably most kids. lol.

 

I definitely don't think you are doing anything wrong! Every baby is different. I do know your frustration, though. My boys are mostly sleeping through the night, but have taken to waking up for the day anywhere between 4:45 & 5:30. I can handle the 5:30 wake up, but 4:45 is crazy! I've tried leaving them in the crib to babble or cry until 5:30, hoping they go back to sleep but no luck so far.

Any suggestions on how to get them to sleep just 45 minutes more would be much appreciated!

 

afrostygirl:

one of my twinkies is doing the same thing - waking up at 5:30 the past couple mornings. its the worst!! we bring him into our bed and try to get him warm and snuggly between us. this did work for about 10 mins this morning, then it was just squirming and crying until 6:15 when I finally just got up with him and started the day, even though his brother did not wake up until 6:45!

I am thinking that with our early riser, it might be teeth? i gave him some baby orajel on his gums and this calmed him for about 15 mins. either that or just really hungry for breakfast...