Allowances and Chores - Pocket Money for 12 year old

I'd really like to hear what other's are doing or have done with their kids in this age range with regards to pocket money so those of you with kids this age, please tell me:

- do your kids get paid weekly, monthly, or per chore?
- do they have a set chore list?
- if they get paid per chore, how much and what for? And how do you keep track of it?
- if paid weekly or monthly, how much?
- what do they buy with their pocket money?

Anything else you want to add re pocket money for this age would be great also.

 

My kids are only 2 so I can't go on what we are doing with them, but I will tell you what I had growing up

- do your kids get paid weekly, monthly, or per chore? I was paid weekly.
- do they have a set chore list? Maybe I don't completely remember. It wasn't anything written down or rigid, but I did dishes, vacuumed, cleaned my room, probably had responsibility regarding the pets. A lot of this, I imagine, is age and ability dependent. My mom was at work when I got home from school. When I got home, there would usually be a note telling me what I needed to do.
- if they get paid per chore, how much and what for? And how do you keep track of it? I did not get paid by individual chores because I was taught that doing such things was just a part of growing up and being responsible and being a part of the house. I was raised by a single mother and I am an only child, but I will do this with my children as well. Because otherwise they can just say "whatever, I don't need the money that bad" and refuse to do a chore. So...certain things were required (whatever I was told to do). BUT there were jobs I could do to earn extra money, like washing the car, stacking wood, etc. She gave me the money when I was done.
- if paid weekly or monthly, how much? I was given $20/week as a teenager. Probably $10 when I was a bit younger. This was in the early 90s by the way. And I was an only child.
- what do they buy with their pocket money? I bought CDs, food, went to movies, bus fare, etc. My mom would still give me money to do stuff sometimes just to be nice (extra cash for a movie or whatever).

 

I grew up in a poor family, and we had no allowance and a ton of chores. I started working outside of the house when I was 12 for cash. Cleaning and babysitting mostly. That money paid for supplementing my wardrobe, buying music (recorded and sheet music), and meals on field trips. At xmas time, I would wrap presents for people in the neighborhood, and use that to buy presents for my sister. When I turned 16 (legal age to work) I got a minimum wage job at Taco Bell. I also did musical gigs occasionally for different things, string bass in orchestras, piano for accompaniment for state competitions. I mostly bought things like clothes or music with my money.

 

I did not get allowance, and I do not give allowance to my children.

I try to raise my children as close to reality as possible (on the job training for adulthood)....teachable moments, etc. I do not pay for chores to get done, I do not pay for good grades either.

I do not know any adult that gets paid to clean their house, cut the lawn, do the dishes, laundry, etc...it is all just part of what needs to be done to survive. I do teach my kids responsibility, but with no money attached to it. They all have 'jobs' around the house, and must do other things when asked.

Since my children were raised with this worth ethic, they appreciate helping others out as well....grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc will call and ask the kids to help them do something and will give them money for helping them....this goes along with the teachable moments of doing what you were trained to do (job training) and making money using the skills that you were taught.

Now don't get me wrong, when my kids need money (to get into a sporting event at school, school dances, a movie with friends, etc) I do give them money, but I think that is part of my job as a parent. In our town, more kids spend time with friends at their house doing free things...swimming, video games, playing wiffle ball, going to ball games, playing basketball, etc.

My children do not care about name brand clothes or shoes, so that might make a difference too.....as a parent, it is my job to provide clothes and shoes for them. If they want something more expensive than I am willing to reasonably spend, I spend what I would normally spend, and they pay for the rest with birthday money.
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My son's girlfriend just stopped by (age 18, 3rd of 4 children in the family), they did not get paid for regular household chores, but did get paid to cut the lawn.....and to clean out dad's work truck (dad has a business in one of the outbuildings in their yard, so the lawn and the cleaning the work truck were both business write-offs).

 

My kids have chores and they get an allowance, but those things are not connected. We tried connecting them at first, but found that the kids would just rather not have money and not do chores. And chores are not an option in our house lol.

We also don't have a set chore list because I need different things done every day. We have a chore center (just a board with a clothespin attached for each child). Every morning I will write down what I want them to do on index cards and clip it to their spot on the board. If I have other stuff for them I usually just tell them when I need it done. In general my 12 and 14 yos: take out the trash, mow, and weedeat. Those are their chores exclusively. They also alternate with the other kids in cleaning their bathroom, cleaning the playroom, cleaning off the porch. When Scott is home he has them clean in the kitchen too, but I don't. I don't like people messing in my kitchen lol! All of my kids do their own laundry except for the 3 and 1 yo.

As for how much allowance they get, that's something we are always fiddling with too. We count their phone plan as part of their allowance and we count some of the $$$$ we spend on Chayton's sports as his allowance also (speed coach, travel ball, etc). Then the 14 yo gets $20 per month over that and the 12 yo gets $10 per month. They don't spend that money on anything other than going to do things with their friends. We live in a rural area so kids mostly hang out at their houses anyway; it is rare that they go into a town with a mall or movies, etc (hour away). If they were buying their own clothes, etc we might raise it but I am an avid thrift/garage saler and they have all learned that they could never buy new what I get for them so they don't complain.

Sometimes we pay them to do extra things, but not often. When Chay was babysitting every day I paid him.

 

Chris that was really really helpful - thank you so much! I have been trying to figure out how to appropriately give my daughter an allowance because she helps me with the babies but she has a hard time in completing her chores because of homework, playing with the babies, and relaxing! I was also wondering if whether I was giving her too much -$40/month less $10 paying back losing new sports uniform/shoes = $30/mth plus I pay for her phone credit $25/mth. She too hardly goes anywhere, just to friends houses and when she does go to the mall - getting her to part with her money is like pulling teeth!

I like your idea of not connecting the allowance to chores although I started deducting 50c for every time she didn't make her bed and after 3 strikes, she's made it every day this week so far - perhaps I can work on her clothes being on the floor as well loL! Or is this being too mean? But tell me, what do you do when their chores are only half completed, on a regular basis?

 

Fortunately, half completed chores are never a problem. Mostly because about 20 minutes before dh gets home from work I round them all up and have them do it all immediately lol so the house isn't a pit! Sometimes my 14 yo doesn't get his done because he'll be gone alot for football practice, or baseball or whatever. Usually the other kids will take them over (or I will) and when he has the opportunity he may do extra to make up for it. We tend to be a little laxer (is that a word?) with his chores because he babysits sometimes and he's the one that tends to get stuck helping with the more difficult stuff (like helping dh reinsulate our pipes, etc) Surely it all comes out in the wash right?

We are not bedmakers here so I have no advice for that one, lol!!!