Aggressive Twin or Just the Age?

Hi there. I have 9 mo boys and one is much more physical (also 5 lbs bigger) and almost seems to "bully" his brother. He is like a bulldozer - will climb into and on top of everything, including his brother - take toys - he has no fear. He will be that kid climbing up the outside of the slide in just a couple of years! Is this just the age? Is it "boy energy"? Is it a twin thing? I don't have other children, so don't have anything to compare to. He was my Baby A and quite active in utero as well. I am probably overreacting, but am just curious if anyone else has had experience with this, and if they outgrow it! I realize he is only 9 months and very curious... but just wanted to throw it out there. TIA

 

I think they all go through phases. I know my DS does and then my DD does and they then are both mellow and then take turns. I think it started about 8 months when they were both crawling like wild animals.

 

I am sure only time will tell, but it sounds like he is just an active baby. One of mine is much more active than the other. He never sits still and has to be right in the middle of things no matter what or who he has to climb over to get there. He is also a taker of things - anything anyone else is playing with. His brother is much more mellow and just likes to sit back and watch the proceedings. Luckily when his brother steals his toys he typically just gets another toy and moves on. Ocasionally he takes a stand they fight it out over something. And most of the time I let them. I figure they have to learn how to deal on their own eventually so as long as it doesn't get out of hand I let them figure it out.

 

My one daughter has always been the more aggressive/ assertive/ leader/ determined... different words to describe the same actions.... funny the other twin will let her take the toys and not put up a fuss. Now the more passive/ easygoing/ relaxed/ twin is taking back a toy she might have wanted. It makes me laugh when the aggressive one cries because her toy was taken away.

I went to a mother's group for 11 month olds and the group leader mentioned how kids have their own rules and almost unspoken language. It made me realize that it was way to early for me to start to impose my rules or society rules on them just yet. Plus I'd be doing it all day long. I figure I'm just going to wait until they are a bit older to understand and right now they dont' seem to mind. I do make sure both are safe of course.

It is hard when we go to a playgroup and she takes toys from a little little child....

 

Lucas tends to be a bully LOL Poor Dillon can't play with anything without Lucas coming over and yanking it away. He climbs on Dillon, pulls his hair, steals his bottles and pacifiers.

Dianna

 

DS is crawling and cruising while DD is still stuck. So he is always coming over and stealing her toys, crawling on her, etc. To make it worse, she seems overly sensitive and cries at the littlest thing, so she doesn't take too kindly to getting kicked and stolen from. This was the main reason we had to finally move to separate cribs.

 

Hi this is my first time on here and I was looking up information on aggressive twins. I am having a hard time with my 16 month twin boys. They are both pretty much same size and weight. But they seem to be fighting constantly. Christopher my oldest just loves to wrestle his brother Connor to the ground and lays on top of him while poor Connor is crying. Then it turns into bitting each other. I am pulling my hair out. It seems like all I say is Christopher leave your bother alone, stop bitting, no hitting....all day long. They are both very active and starting to climb.

I'm a little upset because we found a daycare at a local church (supposta be the best in town) and last tuesday the boys were there for about an hour and I recieved a call say that I need to come pick them up because they can't control them. Christopher bit another child and drew blood. So I get there to pick them up and they have everything packed up (Daycare supply of diapers, food, and juice) waiting for me. So, I ask what is this, and they told me that I was going to have to find a different daycare because there are to many complaints of the boys bitting other children. They only had been to that daycare for a total of 8 days.

I'm going crazy!!! Does anyone have any suggestions??

 

QUOTE(AnnieO @ Feb 5 2009, 10:00 PM) [snapback]1177779[/snapback]
Hi this is my first time on here and I was looking up information on aggressive twins. I am having a hard time with my 16 month twin boys. They are both pretty much same size and weight. But they seem to be fighting constantly. Christopher my oldest just loves to wrestle his brother Connor to the ground and lays on top of him while poor Connor is crying. Then it turns into bitting each other. I am pulling my hair out. It seems like all I say is Christopher leave your bother alone, stop bitting, no hitting....all day long. They are both very active and starting to climb.

I'm a little upset because we found a daycare at a local church (supposta be the best in town) and last tuesday the boys were there for about an hour and I recieved a call say that I need to come pick them up because they can't control them. Christopher bit another child and drew blood. So I get there to pick them up and they have everything packed up (Daycare supply of diapers, food, and juice) waiting for me. So, I ask what is this, and they told me that I was going to have to find a different daycare because there are to many complaints of the boys bitting other children. They only had been to that daycare for a total of 8 days.

I'm going crazy!!! Does anyone have any suggestions??


:welcome: to TS. Since your boys are older than one, I would post a question on the 1-4 board and you will get lots of responses from other seasoned moms of twins in that age range.


To the OP:

We had a lot of the same issues and now at 2 they are both equally aggressive. Give it time!