A very long day....

Today has been wicked long. The boys have not been sleeping or eating very well at all. They are sleeping for very short periods of time and when it comes to eating I am struggling to get them to eat over an ounce. Dillon has been up to 2ozs and Lucas about 1 1/2 ozs. Today, neither are eating that. Their doing ok when awake, so I am thankful for that. I just have to hold them or have them laying right by me. I am grateful as I know they could be crying and screaming. Just trying to figure out what could be going on. Maybe this is typical. I don't remember. It has been such a long time since I had a baby(my youngest daughter is 11).

My husband is really trying to help. When he got home from work, he had me go take a nap. 30 minutes later I wake up to both babies crying. I come out in the living room and he is sitting here trying to hold and comfort both babies. It wasn't working. They don't comfort very easily with anyone else but me. Which this makes it hard for my husband to take over a feeding or even the time between a feeding so I can get some sleep. I feel bad for him as he feels he is doing something wrong, which I have explained to him that babies just want their mama.

Today has been the longest day since we have been home. I have to keep reminding myself that they are not even two weeks old yet. They will be two weeks on Sunday.

How does everyone else handle the exhaustion mixed with the hormones all over the place from having delivered them? I am trying to sleep when they sleep, but for the last few days they haven't always been sleeping at the same time.


Wondering what could have changed with their sleep. They were sleeping a good solid two to three hours at a time. Keeping fingers crossed that tomorrow we will be back to how we were.

Dianna

 

:hug99:

Sorry no advice, just a hug!! Hopefully tomorrow will be better!

 

Its that 6 week mark that is tough! Even though they are an adjusted 2 weeks mine did that at the actual age too. I bet that is what it is. Things got a lot more difficult for us at that time. They were waking up from their preemie stupor and starting to get very demanding. And reflux really kicking in at that time for us. Do the best you can to comfort them, but tell yourself that babies do cry and it is okay for that if you need a break to walk out for a minute and come back in. Do whatever you can to comfort them sling, swing, bouncy, vibrate, shhhh, pat, swaddle, white noisie, feed, paci...ANYTHING!! This is the hard part. You can do this, just hang in there and do try and sleep when they do or if they are awake and happy in the swing catch a few zzzz's. :hug99:

 

QUOTE(cohlee @ Mar 21 2008, 07:49 PM) [snapback]681502[/snapback]
:hug99:

Sorry no advice, just a hug!! Hopefully tomorrow will be better!

Thanks I hope so. Should be a bit better b/c at least my husband will be here and can help with bottles. I had them where I would feed one baby about twenty minutes before the other. Today they have been crying for them at the same time. Not very good at figuring out how to feed them both at once. Have been feeding one a little bit, then the other and going back and forth, but when I do that the baby who is not being fed cries. So not really sure what to do. Can't figure out how to hold both and give a bottle to both at the same time. They are too little to prop a bottle. I feel so guilty when one is crying for a bottle and the other baby is getting what he needs. So back to my point lol tomorrow should be better and Sunday will have family here for Easter so I should get a good break as when family is around they won't let me feed them, they want to do it all.

Dianna

 

QUOTE(DATJMom @ Mar 21 2008, 08:11 PM) [snapback]681525[/snapback]
Its that 6 week mark that is tough! Even though they are an adjusted 2 weeks mine did that at the actual age too. I bet that is what it is. Things got a lot more difficult for us at that time. They were waking up from their preemie stupor and starting to get very demanding. And reflux really kicking in at that time for us. Do the best you can to comfort them, but tell yourself that babies do cry and it is okay for that if you need a break to walk out for a minute and come back in. Do whatever you can to comfort them sling, swing, bouncy, vibrate, shhhh, pat, swaddle, white noisie, feed, paci...ANYTHING!! This is the hard part. You can do this, just hang in there and do try and sleep when they do or if they are awake and happy in the swing catch a few zzzz's. :hug99:


You mentioned a sling. I have been thinking about that for at least one of the babies..Dillon....he is so content when he is with me...was thinking a sling might be the answer. Does anyone know if there is a sling that is good for two babies? Or is that not possible with any sling? Or if it is, would it get to be too much? I have seen lots of slings, but no clue what is a good kind without having to spend an arm and a leg(one income household here).

Dianna

 

QUOTE(Dianna @ Mar 22 2008, 12:11 AM) [snapback]681526[/snapback]
Not very good at figuring out how to feed them both at once. Have been feeding one a little bit, then the other and going back and forth, but when I do that the baby who is not being fed cries. So not really sure what to do. Can't figure out how to hold both and give a bottle to both at the same time. They are too little to prop a bottle. I feel so guilty when one is crying for a bottle and the other baby is getting what he needs.
Dianna


2 suggestions: place a boppy on the couch or floor and lay them side by side elevated on it. Then you can feed them together. Yes, they will scream when you have to stop and burp, but you can feed them at the same time. Or you can put them in bouncys (if you have 2) and rest your elbows on the side and double feed.

 

I think they do make a sling for 2 but I got one from Hotslings.com. Great price and cute selection.

 

I'm so today was so rough. Mine were 6 weeks early, and we all were still in the hospital when they were 2 weeks old, but I remember they didn't take 2 ounces until they were over a month old. As hard as it is, try not to worry about how much they're eating. If you were bf-ing, you would never know how much they were taking. I think us bottle-users freak out over the amount more than we should. (I know I used too.)

And I ditto the pp aout feeding them using the Boppy pillow. I did that many times. I also found it easiest to hold them at the same time if I laid one across my lap and held the other up against my chest. They could both sleep that way and feel like they're being held.

 

QUOTE(DATJMom @ Mar 21 2008, 08:18 PM) [snapback]681540[/snapback]
2 suggestions: place a boppy on the couch or floor and lay them side by side elevated on it. Then you can feed them together. Yes, they will scream when you have to stop and burp, but you can feed them at the same time. Or you can put them in bouncys (if you have 2) and rest your elbows on the side and double feed.

I do have two boppys and two bouncy seats. I think next time I will try the bouncy seats, since they would be more upright. Thanks for the suggestion. If I was so sleep deprived probably could have figured it out LOL Thank goodness for this place


Dianna

 

QUOTE(JessiePlus2 @ Mar 21 2008, 09:27 PM) [snapback]681623[/snapback]
I'm so today was so rough. Mine were 6 weeks early, and we all were still in the hospital when they were 2 weeks old, but I remember they didn't take 2 ounces until they were over a month old. As hard as it is, try not to worry about how much they're eating. If you were bf-ing, you would never know how much they were taking. I think us bottle-users freak out over the amount more than we should. (I know I used too.)

And I ditto the pp aout feeding them using the Boppy pillow. I did that many times. I also found it easiest to hold them at the same time if I laid one across my lap and held the other up against my chest. They could both sleep that way and feel like they're being held.

Their doc the other day said with Lucas(the little one) we should try to get at least 1 3/4 oz in him each time and with Dillon try for 2oz. I probably do over worry about it.

Dianna

QUOTE(DATJMom @ Mar 21 2008, 08:19 PM) [snapback]681543[/snapback]
I think they do make a sling for 2 but I got one from Hotslings.com. Great price and cute selection.

Will check it out Thanks

Dianna

 

QUOTE(JessiePlus2 @ Mar 21 2008, 09:27 PM) [snapback]681623[/snapback]
As hard as it is, try not to worry about how much they're eating. If you were bf-ing, you would never know how much they were taking. I think us bottle-users freak out over the amount more than we should. (I know I used too.)

I agree. I know I used to worry when the girls didn't eat as much at a feeding as normal. But generally, they will make up for a bad feeding by eating more later. All I can say is that I hope things get better soon and good luck!

 

Dianna,
Hang in there!
I just wanted to say that I clearly remember feeling EXACTLY the same way what seems like just the other day. All of a sudden, my boys seem to be much more at ease this week (just after the 6 wk mark....like everyone says). It probably sounds like it will take forever to get to a turning point, but hopefully they'll start to settle down soon! My husband seems to have a hard time when they both cry at the same time, too... (I guess I am just around it more and don't stress as much when it happens). Everything will fall into place, though. Not that we're in any set routine at this point, but somehow things just seem much calmer (when they're not hungry, at least ;-)!
Also, try to find whatever it is you can do for yourself each day (or at least every other day) that makes you happy. I love coffee and even having a mostly decaf (w/ a spash of caf) cup makes my day...I'm nursing and one of my boys has a milk allergy, so I can't have a latte and I'm experimenting w/ rice milk in my coffee - it's interesting to say the least. I can have a cup, though, so I'm not complaining!!
The sleep issue is the toughest, in my opinion. I agree - It really takes a toll on you. Keep trying to sleep when the babies sleep (I've never been good at that, but I still try to lay down or read for a little while to get some relaxation - the cleaning can wait...) and keep in mind that you are not alone. I remember being up at all hours w/ a non-sleeping baby reading posts and realizing that someone else was doing the same thing somewhere! ;-)
Keep us posted on how you're doing!
~Erin

 

hi Dianna, I'm feeling you!

My girls are 3 wks old. For the 1st 2 wks they were in that premmie stupor that was mentined. They would feed 4 hrly, which was great and had no wind.

At three weeks they have hit a growth sppurt (ALREADY??????!!!!) and have decided to feed as little at 2 hrly at times, and the wind thing has kicked in.

Sleep or lack of it is a real downer. Although i have loved bf for 3 wks, i have now changed to expressing and bottle feeding the ebm. This is taking far less toll on me for some reason, feedings arent taking as long and the girls dont seem as windy. We are back to 3 and 4 hourly feeds with 2 bf at 2 pm and 6 am.

I have found it easiest to sit one baby on my thighs, head at my knees, feet at my belly(knees together and feed that baby with my right hand), and feed the other baby sitting in a boppy pillow on my left hand side in the same position, and with my left hand. The boppy is great and cradles the baby comfortably while i burp the other then we swap.

Good luck with finding what works best for you...we are yet to try the bouncy. Hangin there.

 

Hang in there, you are doing a great job!!

I remember mine having a growth spurt around 2 weeks and any "schedule" we had was gone

It will get better, with time :hug99:

 

Rachel made the same suggestion for feeding them at the same time. When mine were that little I put them in between my legs with their heads on my thighs (when I just couldn't make it to the other room because I would forget to bring their chairs in my room with me).

As far as eating and sleeping. You will have them figured out and then they will change and apparently this happens for the first year or so at least.

They will have times they hit a growth spurt and you feel like you can't keep up with feeding them and then there are going to be times where you are just like, why won't you eat.

You are doing fine and all you can and just take it a day at a time. GL

 

Hopefully this is a growth spurt. That would be wonderful Last night was rough. Hubby woke up around 3am to both babies crying and me crying. After their bottles(had them both in the bouncy seats, worked great) just couldn't get them to sleep and both were fussy. Hubby wasn't too happy I didn't wake him up. Not sure why I get so stubborn sometimes and don't wake him up. We did get some solid sleep this morning. I had Dillon in bed with me and my husband had Lucas on the sofa with him. Now both babies are sleeping...oh the wonderful sound of silence LOL

I am so grateful for everyone here, all of ya'lls advice, knowledge and just the fact of knowing I am not all alone in all of this really helps

Dianna

 

QUOTE(Dianna @ Mar 22 2008, 03:50 PM) [snapback]682223[/snapback]
We did get some solid sleep this morning. I had Dillon in bed with me and my husband had Lucas on the sofa with him. Now both babies are sleeping...oh the wonderful sound of silence LOL



Dianna


We did this for weeks. It was the only way any of us got some quality sleep. We each "took" a baby at night and we were responsible for "that baby" all night. We even let them sleep on our chests as we slept either on the sofa elevated or in the rocking chair.

 

QUOTE(DATJMom @ Mar 22 2008, 05:23 PM) [snapback]682475[/snapback]
We did this for weeks. It was the only way any of us got some quality sleep. We each "took" a baby at night and we were responsible for "that baby" all night. We even let them sleep on our chests as we slept either on the sofa elevated or in the rocking chair.

Might be what we do for a bit now. Will see how tonight goes.

Dianna