34 weeks and sooo over this

as eachday progresses i cry. it's getting so hard to want to continue this pregnancy any more. i know that's selfish to say but why torture 1 person to death when the other 2 are happy as clams?

i keep going in and out of the hospital with cramping, nausea, contractions, etc and sometimes they keep me but most times they send me home on strict bedrest. so i can't do anything, i am not sleeping and my boys won't calm down, they are so active that it's becomming painful!

i just don't know what to do anymore.

 

Hang in there momma!!!!!!!!! :hug: :hug:

It IS so hard in those last few weeks ~ I remember feeling resentful, mad, sore, tired, sick etc. BUT take it from me - in a few weeks - once River & Alexander are here all these feelings you are having right now will be a faint memory. It was amazing how everything just changed and I couldn't remember how terrible I felt ~

You are doing great & you are not alone in how you feel!! :grouphug:

 

Seriously, I FEEL YOUR PAIN!!! I am almost resentful, even though that just adds to the guilt, that I have made it this far!! My daughter was five weeks early, yet here I am almost at 38 weeks with TWINS!!!!!!! I want them out!!!!!!!

All I can say to you is, I totally empathize.

Molly
37 weeks 5 days

 

Ok-this has been a week from hell for me, too. I keep emailing my boss- not with excuses, but with why I couldn't work from home today (chriopractor told me to lay down all day & ice, then I get PUPPPS, then I get news of a shortened cervix---AGH!!!). But.

1.) You are fun! :bump: We don't want to lose you to the 1st year or NICU forums just yet. I never realized how much I would be dependant on this site. And we all know we are dependant when the first thing we do when we get home from the doc/hospital is to run & post on twinstuff. I still talk over appointments with girlfriends, but they do not understand that the itching on my belly- yes, it was not just stretch marks.

2.) I'm not at 34 weeks yet, but past 7 o'clock, I want this day over. Sleeping's tough (obviously); but I can't take any more of the general heaviness, malaise, or dropping another FRICKEN thing & having to pick it up. :umm: At that point in the day, if something comes up, I cry like a big ole baby. My poor DH- oy. He seems to get the worst of it- if something's not going how I've COUNTED on it to go all day (just to make it through- like, he'll be home in 20 minutes & I can go home & sleep) there are floods o tears!

3.) Take heart- this twin pregnancy thing sucks. More so than people would even believe. We tend to get the morning sickness harder & get to the crappy, get the heck out of my body stage of pregnancy sooner! (Where's the fun middle section where we just bask in pregnancy- mine lasted about 3 weeks!) When I had morning sickness at 6 weeks (really 9- I had one of those periods that really was implantation); had to buy maternity clothes at 9 weeks; morning sickness that made me throw up on myself in the car :faint: at 13 weeks, that sucked. I think I'd rather go back. At least then putting on my underwear (that's the biggest size I could find/still doesn't fit) wouldn't require sitting down, I wouldn't GROW OUT of materinity clothes & now I wouldn't be on light, restricted duty. What's so hard is that there is NO BREAK from this. Do you have a big calendar you can look at? I keep one handy (over the kitchen sink) & chart my water intake there + appointments, but my favorite part of the day is crossing off yesterday. It's done, & we NEVER have to repeat it.

4.) You are doing wonderful. These circumstances absolutely are torture. This is what shoulda been happening in Guantanemo :yahoo: - I guarantee that 2 weeks with a pregnancy belt, forced hospital bedrest, people asking you the same questions all the time & some IV drugs to make people pee/puke all the time would do the trick.


You can do this- you're taking it like a woman! :bump:

Michelle

 

By the end it was so hard and uncomfortable... but think of it this way... the longer you can hang on and bake those babies, the less likely they'll need NICU time, which is so hard. Then after they are born, you'll probably wish you could go back to being pregnant, if even for a day because you've kinda forgotten what it was like! Seems weird now, but I promise it'll happen! Good luck!

 

I am feeling the same way!! I'm starting my 8th week on modified bedrest and so tired of being alone all the time. I started having contractions at about 22 weeks, so I am really tired of them now. Everytime they pick up a little, I wish it was time to have them, even though I am too early. But, I just had another NICU mom tell me the other day that while this time is a lot of physical torture, having your babies in the NICU is extreme emotional torture. I pray several times a day for strength and patience to keep going. God knows what is best for the babies and I pray that I can keep them in as long as they should be.

 

Hang in there, it won't be long now. :hug:

 

First of all - Hang in there Mama- you are doing a great job!! Carrying two babies is hard work!

My doctor told me if I could get to 34 weeks - everything would be great...I got to 34 weeks 6 days and our babies still ended up being in the NICU for 17 days. We totally did not expect it, because the doctor kept telling us, if they have to go it might only be a week....it was really hard!

You will forget once the babies come how hard it is right now...and, it is easier to care for two babies when they are still in your tummy!!!

It is SO hard - I remember being miserable!! It will be over soon - you can't be pregnant forever - I PROMISE!!!