123 magic

My friend has a 2 year old and was asking me about 123 magic. Have you used it? What age did you use it at and did you like it?

 

We use it with our 6 yr old. It works very well, we rarely get to 2. I think we started when he was 3. I don't use it with the twins yet as I feel mine are too young.

 

We use it with our DS and it really does work for us (and he is pretty strong willed, I think it workds in that he feels like he has some control in making the decision to listen to us) we started right around 2 years old.

 

I know this is going to sound like a weird question but.....
What is 123 magic?

Tiffaney

 

We started using it, but I really need to be more consistent. My problem is I really don't want to put them in time out. :blush: It is effective when used consistently.

 

QUOTE(Tif3 @ Jun 23 2007, 02:37 PM) [snapback]304484[/snapback]
I know this is going to sound like a weird question but.....
What is 123 magic?

Tiffaney


It is a discipline option and book written by Dr. Phalen. He lives in the Chicagoland area and spoke at my twins group last year. He said you can start using it as early as 18 months depending on the child, but for most children it works better when starting at 2 years. As for the method, you basically count to three, if they don't stop by three then the child it put in timeout.

We started early and it has helped. Some behaviors will stop by 3, and sometimes we still have time outs. All and all, I think it has helped us. I recommend looking into it at least. I know our library has his books, vhs and dvd videos.

HTH.

 

Wow, I've used this with my oldest DD for awhile now, probably since age 2, but never knew it had a name. Just always said I'm going to count to 3.

 

The other concept of the system, I've learned, is that you take the arguing and emotion out of your correction, so that when you say, "thats one, that's 2, that's 3... take five time out" you do not argue the child's point with them, you don't show anger or emotion (b/c that's what they want out of you sometimes), and you don't explain why you're right and they're wrong... it's just 1 2 3, then a timeout, usually 5 min, but longer for more serious infractions, like potty mouth or cruelty to others. I haven't started it, but I just watched the video and that's the gist of what I learned. I plan to try it out at about 2 years, though I think one of my DD's is well on her way to readiness for it now, the way she tests me!

 

Nicole, I totally recommend it!! I started in earnest around 2 yrs. and it works great. We are visiting my parents right now and it's saving us a lot of headaches!!

 

QUOTE(Snittens @ Jun 23 2007, 07:06 PM) [snapback]304687[/snapback]
We started using it, but I really need to be more consistent. My problem is I really don't want to put them in time out. :blush: It is effective when used consistently.



We never called or call it "time out". I do not like that term personally. 123 Magic is used here for helping them to regain control and stop the "bad" behaviour. If they cannot stop them selfes from doing XYZ (that would be the 3) I will have to help them by removing them from the situation or the situation from them. We usually sit down in the bed room together and take deep breaths and count to 3. Then we talk about it, hug and kiss and things are cool. My goal is to model how I would want to be treated.