Who's older; who's the leader?

So Cameron is our first born twin and Kiefer is our second by 3 minutes. It's becoming more and more obvious that Kiefer has taken the role of the older brother. He's very protective of Cameron and will do things in order to make him happy. If Cameron is in trouble, Kiefer will stand up to us and tell us not to talk to Cameron the way we do (we don't yell or do anything bed, but Kiefer doesn't like seeing Cameron get in to trouble). He has in the past give up his toys in order to please Cameron but he's gotten better at holding on to his own stuff. If there is two of something, he'll give it up to Cameron and take the other one. If there is only one of something, sometimes he'll hold on to it even if Cameron is upset about it. He will eventually give in and let Cameron have it, but that's after a little time of playing with it which is what we want to see. He wasn't always good with sharing and he's getting much better. But today in school, seeing how upset Cameron was that his class wasn't going to do waterplay today, he decided he was not going to do waterplay either even though his class has water play on Mondays. The teacher believes he was protesting because he wanted Cameron to play too and thought if Cameron can't play in the water, then he wasn't going to in support of Cameron. Both teachers in each class have seen Kiefer being protective of Cameron.

So evne though Kiefer was second born, he's the "older" brother. Which of your twins acts like the older sibling? First or second born?

 

My Baby B is the leader.

 

My baby B is the same. He is very protective of his "little" brother. And he is also two inches taller and 2 pounds heavier.

 

My Baby A is older by 3 minutes, and he has consistently been bigger (right now about 3lbs heavier and an inch taller).

As far as one or the other acting older, I can't make a clear distinction - it changes from moment to moment depending on what we are doing. Baby B is definitely my more social one and the more empathic (one of his favorite phrases is "you okay?"), and will interact with new people without hesitation. Baby A is more talkative, creative, and goofy when around people he knows, but he can be reserved out in public or with new people and it takes him some time to warm up. They are both equally concerned when the other is upset or in trouble, and neither of them like to share things much yet (although they are starting to get that a TINY bit). I can't pick one as a clear "big brother" figure.

 

Kiefer is my Baby B, but he's more shy in public. Cameron is the social one and will warm up and talk to people much more quickly than Kiefer. I guess that is why I'm surprised Kiefer has taken on this role of big brother. Kiefer is only an inch taller than Cameron and about 1-2 pounds heavier so it's not very noticeable that he really is the bigger boy. It just interests me the roles they have taken.

I'm still curious, keep the replies coming!

 

My baby B is the leader for sure! Baby A is much more shy and sensitive.

 

My "baby A" is older by an hour and 6 minutes. She's also 4 inches taller and over 20 lbs heavier (they're 6 1/2). And she's definitely the leader. Partly it's just personality. But Sabrina (baby B) is also legally blind so that could be part of it, she's maybe more timid because of her vision.

 

It's hard to say. My DD is 2 minutes older but she is not always the leader. It seems to go back and forth between the two of them. Sometimes she is, sometimes he is.

 

My twin A is the leader, he would be the one to go get the identical toy if twin B was wanting his. Twin B tends to be shy but more daring.

 

DD is older by less than a minute (c-section) and can be the leader in terms of "let's do this, go get this" but DS is much more of a protector. If DD is crying, he is very concerned and upset that someone upset her. I think he will be a big protector of her and take on that "older brother" role as he grows up.

 

They were only a minute apart and DS #1 is the leader and always has been. DS #2 will follow him and do what he wants. At 4 1/2 #1 is telling #2 to do a lot of things he knows he should not do. He does not want to do it (or ask) but thinks it's okay to have his brother do it. :gah:

 

My Baby A (older by a minute) has been bigger by about 4 lbs. since about 4 months old. He had more "attitude" in utero and continues to be the leader. He has a dominant, "driver" personality. Baby B definitely takes over and pushes back more than he used to, but at the end of the day, Baby A is more dominant and more of a natural leader.

 

My baby A (JT) is older by 54 mins but I think in terms of protecting and sharing the "big brother" role would be more baby B (Jack). He seems more attentive to others feelings and more willing to give up toys to please others......sometimes. Tomorrow it may be JT but lately it's been Jack. Oh and they weigh the same but JT has an inch or more on Jack

 

Alice is both older and the leader. But that is totally my personality vs. my husband's personality, and Alice is completely like I was at that age, and Roycie is just like my husband was at that age.

 

My Baby B is definitely the leader, or, she also likes to call herself Baby A's "pretend mommy".

 

My baby b is taller and bossier. But Baby a likes to remind everyone that even though she is smaller, she is the "big sister!"

 

Twin A is probably the leader. She is more outgoing and B is more shy. B does not like to do things without A involved...for example going to the playground, A will play with other kids, B only wants to play with A. I think A makes her feel safe.

 

We really don't think of or refer to one of them as "older" since they're the same age.
I think from an outside perspective, it might seem like Will is the leader since he's more vocal and aggressive. But Alex is actually a lot more independent; even though he can be quiet, he totally holds his own and doesn't just follow Will around. They each do their own thing.

 

Mine are 1 minute apart and the leadership flip flops back and forth. Liam is mostly the instigator. He's my little trouble maker. And whatever he does, Rylee follows. However, Rylee can cause her own trouble too and convince Liam to take part. So they share equally in slowly driving me crazy

 

Amy is the younger (by 1 minute) but she is definitely the Big Sister. She bosses Sarah around like crazy. She also tends to hit every milestone first, though not by much. And she's 3 inches taller, though we're hoping the difference will decrease now that Sarah is off gluten (she was diagnosed with celiac -- gluten has been inhibiting her growth).

Sarah then falls into the role of the Little Sister -- whining, being stubborn, and doing little things to annoy Amy when no one's looking. She can be the classic example of a "pest." (We just finished reading "Ramona the Pest" out loud -- both kids loved it.)

On the plus side, Amy feels very protective of Sarah (even though Sarah doesn't appreciate it) and Sarah does tend to go along with Amy's ideas a lot of the time. Amy is just more of a natural leader. Sarah isn't actually a follower but she is happy to go her own way.