Calling All Working Moms!How the heck doyou aff

Discussion in 'Pregnancy Help' started by danasacks, Oct 20, 2011.

  1. danasacks

    danasacks Active Member

    How the heck do you afford childcare? We don't have any family nearby that can watch our angels when they arrive, and the more I research childcare options the more depressed I get. Some places offer 10% discounts for a second child, leaving us looking at $2500-3000 per month in costs, which we absolutely cannot afford. I also can't afford to stay home with them, as I carry our family health insurance policy a very good policy that you all know is priceless.

    Anybody got any suggestions?
     
  2. rrodman

    rrodman Well-Known Member

    Your costs seem on the high end depending on where you live. We paid about $24K a year the most expensive year. Generally speaking, you may want to look at smaller, in home places, which tend to be cheaper than centers.
     
  3. miss_bossy18

    miss_bossy18 Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    Or possibly a nanny.
     
  4. Tamaralynn

    Tamaralynn Well-Known Member

    For me because I am a single mom with 3 that are soon to be 4 and under, and I go to school full time, I qualify for childcare subsidy in Ontario, Canada. My Childcare at the moment is free for me, but the waiting list is long and it is so very hard to get it here. I am very grateful and thankful that I am able to have it.
     
  5. Katheros

    Katheros Well-Known Member

    I couldn't afford daycare when the twins were born and I couldn't afford not to work either. I went back to work after 4 weeks and worked the graveyard shift. It was hard, but it kept money coming in. After about two years of that I switched to evenings and had family watch them. Once they got older, the cost of daycare wasn't as bad and I eventually did put them in when I went back to school and worked 3 jobs, there were about 2 1/5. There wasn't an extra dime in my pocket, but I did it!
     
  6. MarchI

    MarchI Well-Known Member

    Basically, we paid out the nose until this year when the oldest went to 1st grade and the twins went to a room where they potty train and the kids are more self sufficient. It was hard but we looked at everything in our budget and decided what we could lose (the gym membership went, eating out was non-existent). We cut a lot of amenities, refinanced the house to a lower rate, and basically were careful with every single purchase until we were in better shape. It's not been easy but it is doable and reorganizing your refinances is the place to start.
     
  7. TwinxesMom

    TwinxesMom Well-Known Member

    I went thru dhs. They are now kept by family since its only after school care.
     
  8. FGMH

    FGMH Well-Known Member

    Looking at the cost you quoted - I second researching the option of a nanny.

    I would also look at shifting hours at work so that the time when both you and your DH are away at work is less and you need fewer hours of care. Ususally, one of us would leave really early in the morning and come home in the early afternoon while the other does "morning duty" with the children and works late into the evening. We switch this around according to business appointments either of us needs to accomodate. I am sure that saves us 2-3 hours of daycare per day which adds up.
     
  9. Trishandthegirls

    Trishandthegirls Well-Known Member

    I agree that those costs look high - are you only looking at big centers? There are probably quite a few in-home places near you that charge less. Just make sure you select somewhere that has a low adult to child ratio so your kids get lots of individual attention. For us, hiring a nanny made the most sense for the first few years. That allowed us to keep the kids at home, not have to drag them out in the winter, not have to worry about pickup and drop off, etc. etc, etc. I loved having a nanny. She came to our house about 15 minutes before I left for work and then was done about 15 minutes after I got home. We gave her holidays off and vacation time, but on those random days that I only worked 1/2 day, she was happy to run errands for me instead of watching my girls, so we got nice flexibility in addition to wonderful childcare. We paid slightly more than daycare, but the additional benefits outweighed the costs.
     
  10. sulik110202

    sulik110202 Well-Known Member

    We have the kids in an in home daycare and it is substantially cheaper than the center type daycares. I found a lot of resources on our state health and human services web-site. They gave me a listing of all the licensed in home daycare centers in our area and then I went from there with visiting them. Your state might cover daycare under a different division, but I am sure a quick google search could point you in the right direction. Do you belong to a church? Maybe there is someone there that does daycare out of their home that you could get a recommendation from. Talk to friends with children and ask where they go to daycare. I can't speak highly enough about our in home daycare. She is a member of my family now and my kids have received excellent care while there.
     
  11. Utopia122

    Utopia122 Well-Known Member

    My husband took a second shift job so he could be with the kids during the day, and then I was with them at night. We were able to send them to daycare only half days instead of all day. Totally a bummer that we had to do that (DH and I only saw each other on the weekends), but it was the only way we could afford it. Thank goodness 2nd shift was an option for us. We only had to do this, though, from about 2 on because my mom volunteered to keep them up until that point.
     
  12. Meximeli

    Meximeli Well-Known Member

    I would also investigate a nanny or if you have space in your house an au pair. And don't forget there are more and more stay at home dads out there.
     
  13. Fossie

    Fossie Well-Known Member

    My husband is a realtor which means no consistent paycheck and no insurance, but an inability to be a full-time stay at home dad when he was working so we were in the same boat! We were looking at about 2,000 a month, with the twin discount, at all of the centers that I could find so our two were at an in-home daycare for the first two years, which was significantly cheaper and an all around good experience. The lady who kept them came highly recommended, she kept a limited number of children under the age of 2, and was able to keep the kids on a schedule which I really liked and wouldn't have been possible at a larger place. When my kids turned two it was time to look for new childcare, and I got lucky that there was a position open in my field that included childcare so I made a job switch and now they come with me. You do have to get creative, nanny sounds like another option, but either way when they are babies the expense is exorbitant and you just have to find a way to make it work until their care gets a little cheaper. Like PP, we had to make a lot of cutbacks even when we found something that was more affordable because it was still a budget shock. Our state (TN) has all licensed childcare facilities on a website (including in-home ones), and I did look on craigslist too and asked for references and met with a lot of people before thankfully the woman who ended up keeping them called with an opening literally the week before I gave birth. Good luck - it is so stressful and a lot of people will tell you that it isn't worth it to work - but sometimes it is just what you need, want or have to do!
     
  14. Minette

    Minette Well-Known Member

    We used a very good daycare center that was about $1000/month per kid for 9 hours a day, 5 days a week. I thought we lived in an expensive place (Boulder, CO) but I guess not!

    It did basically use up most of my take-home pay, but it was well worth it since I could not have dealt with being a SAHM.
     
  15. j-squared

    j-squared Well-Known Member

    Daycare centers here cost about $1200-1300 per infant per month with toddlers being about $900-1000 so we are looking at about a $3400 or so a month for three kids. It sucks.

    We have investigated in-home daycares, which are about half that cost but there is a reason they are half the cost... they have 10 kids age 5 and under a day to ONE caregiver. We would consider it if we found just the right person and felt they were handling that many kids well, but so far the in-homes we have looked at are not the place I would drop off my toddler and two infants.

    I feel your pain. I also carry our health insurance so not working isn't an option, but DH makes more money than I do and his salary is the minimum we need to pay our bills, etc.

    We are currently investigating nannies, which, for multiple kids, are cheaper than center care. Au pairs are also an option and much cheaper if you have room to house one (we don't).
     
  16. rosenschaf

    rosenschaf Well-Known Member

    I don't know your living situation, but if you have a small room to spare, you could look into au pairs. Young people basically stay and eat at your place, take care of kids and some household duties. They get about 300$ spending money (or less if you can give them use of a car, etc.). They sort of become family members, so that has to be okay with you. We have a young guy living with us and he's fabulous. He takes a load off in terms of doing all the cleaning and shopping and he usually takes care of the baby during the day (we have free daycare in Germany, so the boys are there in the mornings when I work).
    Good luck with everything!
     
  17. twinsnowwhat

    twinsnowwhat Well-Known Member

    Those costs sound similar to the area I live and work in. I have seen as high as $1700 per infant per month FT. I would also recommend looking at a smaller in home daycare they are typically much less. Also DH and have some flexibility in our schedules – is there an opportunity to work 4 – 10’s or reduce to 32 hours or whatever is necessary to keep your insurance to cut down on the number of days your children need daycare. I know a lot of people – myself included – that for sure their employer would not agree to a modified work schedule but they did :) Nanny’s in my area are also at a premium – largely due to a large employer in the area that pays very well. So they often are paid between 15-20 per hour not including taxes, holiday bonus, sick and vacation pay. With a little creativity you will find a way!
     
  18. Bets123

    Bets123 New Member

    It is so nice to know other people are experiencing this problem too. We have a 2.5 year-old and are pregnant with twins. We can't afford to send them both to our toddler's current day care (which is one of the more expensive day cares in the area, affordable for 1, not for 3), but we found another one in town that offers discounts for siblings and early payment and is less expensive overall. It's still going to be extremely expensive and we will barely be in the black each month but I keep telling myself it is temporary and will be less expensive as they get older. We looked into Nannies, and I would love to do that, but for three children and full-time care, it would be too pricey. Also, with our jobs need the reliability a center provides as far as being open every day. Good luck!!
     
  19. Lindala25

    Lindala25 Well-Known Member

    I have 3 kids being watched for $325 a week by someone that watches children out of her house. Probably $1400-1500/month. She only watches one other boy who is about 9 months younger than my oldest so my oldest enjoys having him there. I would ask around if you know anyone that watches children out of their house. I found her by a friend suggesting her. She typically has 2-4 kids she watches at a time and has been doing this for years, so not really a "daycare" as most think of it. I would also at least check out nannies.
     
  20. Mom2VLS

    Mom2VLS Well-Known Member

    My husband and I couldn't afford daycare with my oldest when she was born so we altered our work shifts so that I got home just before he had to leave. It did make it hard because his schedule was never consistent and unless business was slow and he wasn't getting paid much, we didn't see as much of each other as we'd like. Then about six months ago, he got offered a full-time job. What helped us was that he generally got one day off during the week and had to work every Saturday and every other Sunday. Also, there were some half-days during the week. Since no daycare center would work with a weird schedule like that, we found a local woman who runs an in-home daycare and was recommended to us to keep my daughter 1-2 days a week. The rest of the weekdays were filled by a family friend who also used to nanny. So it may help to investigate multiple options at once and/or staggering work schedules (would it be possible for one of you to work a 4 X 10 hour schedule?).
     
  21. Babies4Susan

    Babies4Susan Well-Known Member

    When my girls were little I had a nanny, which was cheaper than infant daycare for two. But basically, until they went to kindergarten this fall, I was paying about $1800/month in childcare. I had the nanny at first, then a combo of nanny and PT preschool, then a combo of family (whom I paid) and PT preschool.

    The hard thing about a nanny is that if she calls in sick, you have no backup care. I work from home and could manage if she was gone (and my first nanny had an attendance problem), but if you work outside the home that's somewhat risky. I did look into an au pair at some point, as we do have the space, but I just wasn't fond of having someone always in my home.

    I do think the prices you are getting are quite high though, even for a center. I live in a pretty high cost area, and I didn't see prices anywhere near that.

    Also, could your husband stay home with them?
     
  22. j-squared

    j-squared Well-Known Member

    Unfortunately, the cost of living and the cost of daycare do not always line up. Minnesota apparently has "more stringent" licensing rules than other states, resulting in much higher-priced daycare. Average cost here is $1300 or more per month per child for infant care in a center.

    So the quotes the OP got of $2500/month for both babies sounds perfectly normal for where I live.

    There is the option of in-home daycare here as well, which is 1/2-2/3 the cost of a center, but finding one that could take two babies (or that you'd want to trust your two babies to) is difficult as many of them have 10 kids under age 5 a day with only ONE caregiver. I don't want my two infants being cared for along with 8 other kids by one person.
     
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