Unhappy mama

I just got our teacher assignments. They split the twins after I requested they stay together one more year. Our district's rule is to follow the parents wishes; that's what I was told last year. Now to email the new principal. *sigh*

 

:hug: Hopefully it was a mistake and they can easily fix this issue. :hug:

 

Yikes. That is a total bummer. Hopefully they can resolve it quickly. When does school start?

 

I had asked if they would split my twins and the lady i talked to said not unless I requested it .. which I didn't .. and they still split them. I was a little upset at first .. but it turned out to be better for them. But that was our story. You need to do whats right for your little ones.
I hope you can get it straightened out !

 

They did this to us last year but got it fixed. I requested them to be together but if they split them it wouldn't be bad either at this point

 

Yikes! I hope you can get that straightened out right away.

Our district is the same way, and it never occurred to me that they might mess it up and do the opposite of what I requested.

 

I almost think they do it on purpose. I was talking to one of the boys teachers (who has twin grandsons) and she says that teachers don't like having twins in the same classroom. But oh well .. if thats what the parents want then they should respect it. Plus this may have been just her opinion ..

 

It could also be that when putting the classes together, the teacher determined that the different teachers would be the best fit for each student, or the class might be better for each student. Marcus' K teacher had triplets, and she insisted that they be kept together. What she refused to see (not that you are doing this), is that the three in one class (2 girls and a boy), made for a bad classroom dynamic. It got so bad that they told the teacher/parent, that she no longer had a choice, they were that much of a problem together. Once they were split up, they all did really well, found friends and everyone was much happier (except the mom).

So keep in mind that more may have gone into it than just "splitting the twins".

 

I emailed the principal to ask how/why it was decided to split them. I've looked at both sides (together and apart) before deciding. I'd they have good reasons, I'm more than willing to listen. I just don't like that it appears they didn't even consider my input.

Oh, school starts on the 17th for us.

 

My twins are also starting K this year and we had also requested that they be kept together. We got their class assignments in the mail a week or 2 ago and was very upset to see they put them in different classes.
My first instinct was to call and demand they be put in the same class. I was not happy. THe more I thought about it I decided to keep them apart.
My main reason for keeping them together was for their comfort...and yes I will admit... same homework, making it easier for mom and dad.
Putting those reasons aside I decided that it will probably be a good thing for them to be apart. They won't have each other to rely on and it will give them a chance to be their own little people and make their own friends.
I hope I am making the right decision.
I hope you can get them together if that is the best thing for them. I know how you are feeling.
Let us know how it turns out and I'm curious to hear the reason your school gives you.

 

I would like to think that as teachers, we would balance the wishes of parents and the needs of kids, and not unilaterally override their requests because we know what would be "the best fit"! Even if the teachers determined that it would be best to keep them apart, that should have been discussed with the parents beforehand. Actually, after 15 years of teaching, this is one area where I have seen the pendulum swing. It used to be, in the states/districts/grades I have taught, twins were always separated. It may have been that way when the PP was teaching even. No questions asked because that is what is best for the kids and teachers. However, more and more we are seeing twins kept together in the younger years. This is partly due to parent requests but also research that indicates that separation is not always the best for kids. Personally, I would like to think that parents know their kids way better than their teachers. This is one area, where unless there are extreme extenuating circumstances, that a parent's request should be granted. Just my two cents.

 

We separated for first grade. The kids had the exact same homework every night. They also had the same spelling list every week. Honestly, having them separated made no difference in the work for me. The only thing that was the slightest bit inconvenient for me was Sarah had to bring her own snack every day and Timothy's class rotated who brought snack for the whole class. The kids had recess together twice a day. Most days they ate lunch at the same table.

Mine were together in kindergarten and it worked well. It was partly my choice and partly that there was no other option (2 classes, one 1/2 day class, one full day class). My moment where I realized that they needed separated for first grade was picking them up from school in the spring, and listening to them argue in the car over the details of a story from school that day or argue over exactly how to pronounce the substitute teacher's name. In first grade, they each have their own stories and no arguments in the car and very few arguments at home because they are happy to be around each other after being apart.

A lot will depend on your school and how they handle things, but I hope it turns out well for you.

Marissa

 

Thank you for this insight. Even though the girls are together for kindergarten this year, at the end of preschool I found this to be the case with us. Also, one twin getting jealous because the other twin got star student or some other reward and not understanding why she didn't get a reward. I am heavily leaning towards splitting them for first grade. I know they will do fine, they often go to sunday school or school by themselves with no problem when one is sick, I just wanted to keep them together for their kindergarten year.

 

The principal called me yesterday, just one day after he sent me a reply email, because I hadn't gotten back in touch about it. Have to say, I was impressed. We weren't able to do what I had originally asked for (together with a particular teacher) so we are going to leave them split. I'm not worried about them being apart, academically I think that teacher would have been a better fit, but I'm ok with it now. Thanks for letting me whine. LOL