considering getting rid of all their toys

My girls kept on dumping their toys out of the toy box and leaving them everywhere. We repeatedly asked them to pick them up. They said no and didn't do it. So DH got out garbage bags and all of their toys went in the bags. We were thinking this would cause a big tantrum and that they could do little chores to earn back their toys. Well they showed us. The girls couldn't care less. Obviously they have way too many toys so they aren't taking care of anything they've got. We don't want spoiled brats. I know that's harsh, but from what I've observed in other kids and my own kids who have every toy don't value anything that they have.

So if you were me would you really give away all of their toys? I'm going on a week of having 3 big garbage bags of toys in my living room. I was thinking for their birthday this year instead of having a party we'd take them on a trip out of town for the night, without their brother, to do something fun just us girls. But not give them any more toys until Christmas and then maybe one or two each. I'm tired of them not taking care of their things. They obviously don't need them. Tell me I'm not a mean mom.

 

You are not a mean mom! Most of my girls' toys are in my attic right now. I was swapping out toys from the attic, but now every week I bring up more toys than I bring down. They definitely play better when they have less. I'm probably going to do a donation purge at the end of the summer from the attic. Certain things they haven't even noticed are gone, but others they've asked for so I'll keep that stuff.

 

Sorry I had to laugh when I read this, I did this with my oldest and he did the same exact thing!

I don't think your mean and what we did was put the bags of toys in storage buckets and put them in the attic. Once I noticed that he was getting bored of things or he had been really good then I would bring something down for him. He would get so excited to see his toy again and we started asking him if he wanted to trade. So he could trade one big toy for another.

This is a great reminder that I really need to purge the playroom :headbang:

 

I feel exactly the same way as you!! I say go for it! I dont think you are being a mean mom at all!

 

One of the best things a friend suggested to me was to have out very few toys. Like 10. The rest get separated in big bins and we rotate them. I put a big toy (ride on, rocking horse or FP House) in with each bin of smaller stuff, too. The idea is to keep it fresh and interesting. We also pick up and display the toys each night (on bookshelves- pieces in all the puzzles or in the toybox if it's 1 piece and a little bigger). You might try it before getting rid of everything. ardon:

 

Before you do, make sure you keep the toys that your little guy might use!

 

Try this: Every time your kids get a new toy, make them choose an old toy to give to charity. It helps keep the number of toys at a constant level and teaches charitable giving.

 

I just did this about a month ago. I need to do it again, except this time actually throw them out/donate them. We kept the garbage bags in DH's trunk thinking they could earn some back with extra chores. There are only 2 things they have asked for. One was a digital camera and one was a stuffed animal. That's it. I think I will just get rid of the rest of them. But our basement looks like a bomb went off b/c they just won't put stuff away and I'm so sick of doing it I could scream (well, I may have actually screamed).

 

Aimee, I don't think you are a mean mom at all. I think your idea for their birthday and Christmas is a good idea.

 

I think you have come up with some good ideas. I completely understand where you are coming from. I also do like the idea of separating the toys into bins and rotating them every so often. We have certainly done a fair share of charitable donations as well.

 

Rotating toys is the way to go. Too many makes everyone crazy

 

If you're mean, then child services needs to be called about me. :lol: I am with you on the spoiled brat feelings. <_< I have always gone through their toys about twice per year and purged a lot of it. We have either sold it, or given it to Early Intervention (and of course have to toss the broken stuff, but I try to recycle as much as possible). We have downscaled a TON and my girls still have plenty to play with. They definitely don't need a lot. I don't know that I would get rid of all of them, but keep a few key things they play with most.

2 years ago I asked grandparents (because we have 3 1/2 sets!) to get them A toy and then use the rest for their college fund or books or clothes, or something else, just not toys. They have followed through on my wishes and what a difference it makes around here!!

My friend recently had a party for her dd, and they asked for donations of new books, coloring books, and crayons to be donated to Boston Children's Hospital. I thought that was an AWESOME idea!! I have another friend who asked for books, one to give away to charity and one for the birthday kid to keep.

I think your idea of taking them away rather than a gift is PERFECT! That's just what we did last year. We bought them small Vera Bradley bags (less than $20!!), a couple very small things, and then took them away to 2 amusement parks in the mountains. Toys last a little while, memories last forever!! :wub:

Phew, sorry that was so long. :laughing:

 

Oh yeah, one more thing. When we go through toys and animals, I make a huge pile and tell them how many things they can choose to keep. Then I tell them the rest is going to kids who only have 1 or 2 toys/animals to play with. They have always been very receptive to this and very willing to give their toys away (I guess because I'm giving them the option of keeping favorites). I LOVE that about my girls!!

 

haha! I will say that a lot of the toys that I "still" have in the play area are things that I think are great! but... if the kids don't play with them... also, less is really more. if you can I would sell or donate what you truly don't think you need.

 

This is great! We do something similar, and it helps when they remember something is missing.

 

thanks for the suggestions! I'm going to do it today. I'll let them keep their bitty babies b/c those are nice dolls they might play with some day and the rest are going in my closet for maybe Cooper one day. I just think that Cooper is going to get his own toys so he's not going to want these either but I'll save them just in case.

 

For their 3rd birthday we just had family over (still 25 people including kids) and we asked that NO ONE bring gifts. First they have all they need, second we don't have the room. You would've thought we were starting a revolution! I had to have two serious talks with my mother and my DH reminded his family multiple times. The girls were so excited to have a party, family over, cake, etc. it was a huge day that gifts were not missed (especially since they don't know to expect them) only we do! So we only had one person show up who claims see didn't see the email until the last minute. (really? so you did see it right? then why didnt you take it back? Why did you show up with it?) How rude! My poor mother who had to sit on her hands not to buy them anything and my SIL walks in with a huge gift! I guess I'm the mean one

Anyway your idea of a day trip is perfect. They'll understand it's for their birthday and it's special for them...they will love it!

 

I did this just the other day but with clothes they dumped out of the closet. (we didn't throw them out but I wanted to !) We have kept a minimum of toys and they STILL are at the stage of pulling out all the drawers in their Trofast system (IKea). We are on to the 5 th or 6th time this week they have pulled out these drawers. We have a small wicker chest in one room and the same downstairs. I went through the toys after we moved in January. We have lived far from family until just this year so this might be why we have less toys. With Mc Donald's toys we just quickly put them in our diaper bag so while they do realize where they come from, the Mc Donald's / toy isn't immediate. We don't buy 3 Mc Happy meals so this is why we started this. The toys come in handy for days I need to keep them busy. So while I don't see my kids as spoiled, they just seem to be that way because of their age. They seem to have such short attention spans and have that egocentric attitude we all know and love. I think you sound like a GREAT mom.

Heather

 

i LOVE your idea for their birthday!!! i may steal that idea...

 

If you are mean then I am too!!

I spent the first 4 years of their lives buying toys at every turn. Now that they are 4.5 I am on a toy strike which has caused some meltdowns in Target but they play with the toys in the store and as soon as we get home they turn into flooring. I am so tired of it!! I havn't bought any toys in months and it has been so nice!! This new baby may never see a new toy until Christmas! We just donated a huge bag of toys and it was not to make room for new ones! I also love your birthday idea!

 

We also put away half (or more) of their toys at a time and bring them out when they get bored with the others. I think I might start putting 2 boxes away at a time instead of 1 because it's getting ridiculous. My 15 month old loves to dump the toy boxes out as well so I feel like I'm fighting a losing battle. You're not a mean mom at all. You're teaching them to appreciate and value their things. Good luck!!

 

You guys motivated me to totally clean out and organize the piles of toys we have accumulated. I gave away lots of baby toys and grouped all other toys into bags and bins (barn and farm set/musical toys/plastic reptiles and dinos/princess dress-up/lego/wood blocks/cars and airplanes, etc.) and I moved all bins to some shelving in the garage. Yesterday, I put out one tub in the play room and one in the family room, along with a stack of books and one puzzle. They went crazy when they saw all of their cars and vehicles lined up in a row and played with them for an hour (an hour!). I thought it was a fluke, but they went crazy this morning when they woke up and saw all of their dinosaurs, lizards, frogs, bugs and snakes on the coffee table together and played with them forever. They also worked the puzzle and they haven't touched it in months.

I'm finding it much easier to clean up because there isn't so much scattered out. I have them help pick up before we can swap the bin out for another toy. They're motivated to help pick up too as they want something new. They're playing with these old toys like they're brand new because all of the pieces are together, and it's fresh. My house is much less cluttered looking without the random toys stuffed in every basket, shelf and corner.

I love the idea that for every birthday and Christmas gift they get, we will gather up an old toy and donate it, with them being involved as I usually just do this myself on occasion. I will start this with the next birthday.

They're enjoying their toys so much that now I'm motivated to go buy something new with lots of pieces. I haven't bought any toys in forever because they didn't play with them longer than two minutes, and then the pieces disappeared and the toy became useless.

Thank you so much everyone for these tips!

 

It's purge day here. The girls all just left with my ILs for the weekend. I'm excited to dig into the mess...if I can drag myself away from the computer.

This! I've learned my lesson the hard expensive way. Get rid of half of the toys (sell, donate, trash the things with missing/broken pieces), split the rest in to three or four sets, rotate.