how do you know when it's time to wean?

People are asking me about weaning a lot these days. I made it to 7 months! :yahoo: How will I know when it's time to wean? Is it just a matter of when I don't feel like doing it any more and he's willing to drink from something else? Cooper will drink from anything. Eventually will he stop wanting to nurse? When he nurses now he's so distracted. He frequently tries to do this weird thing while he nurses. I still lay him across my body on the boppy pillow, and he wriggles himself onto his stomach and attempts to nurse from his belly with his head up in the air. It usually makes him lose his latch. More often that not now he sucks for a few seconds, then pulls off and looks around for a few seconds, then comes back. It feels like I barely have any milk in there, but since I never pump I have no way of knowing.

It would be really nice to have the freedom of being away from him. How do you know when it's time to wean?

 

What are your goals? For me, I didn't want to do formula. If you stop now, you'll have to do that. Ok- part of it is I'm cheap and didn't want to fork over the money for formula (even though at the time I was on WIC- somebody pays for it ). Plus, nursing is so much easier time wise- I wash enough dishes!

I always think it's weird when after 6 months people start asking you about weaning. My goals were I just wanted to nurse mine through the first year and play it by ear. I did wean at 15 months during cold and flu season... that will never happen again. I had no idea how fast they recover from a cold while nursing verses not. They were sick all winter long.

I do think eventually he will wean. It might not be on your timetable- you may have to encourage him along, but it'll happen. You definitely have milk in there. I know what you mean about feeling like there isn't any, though. Do you nurse him in a quiet environment free from common distractions? I wonder if he'd like to nurse sitting up- essentially sitting on your lap facing the breast?

Congrats on making it 7 months!

 

:rofl: I have 3 children 3 and younger. There is no such thing as a quiet room free from distractions! I wish! I swear my twins wait until I am in the glider nursing and then come at me with 50 requests.

I don't know what my goal is. I wanted to nurse for 6 months so I guess I reached my goal. I don't really want to wash bottles either. But I'm not against him getting formula. He is so extremely healthy - at 7 months old he has never had a sick appointment and has only had 1 very minor cold, no fever or anything. :ibiggrin: It would be nice to skip formula altogether though. I think I'm going to try sending him to my parents house this weekend with the girls, with some formula, and pump when I feel full. There has got to be a way for me to keep nursing but also have the freedom of one night away from him every other weekend.

 

My oldest was like that, she just didn't want to sit still for nursing. She finally self-weaned at almost 10 mos and I gave her follow-up formula for a month till she was 1. If you have no problem with formula, maybe introduce some, or expressed breastmilk into a sippy. Especially since by now I assume he's having food as well. I understand not wanting to buy but if you are still giving breast milk, you may not need as much as you think. If you decide to totally wean, give him a lil formula with a splash of apple/pear juice and see how he likes it, seems to make it a little sweeter, more "like" boob juice. I bought a can of ready to feed first to see if my last one would even drink it (didn't want to waste $$) He surely does sound like he's weaning himself.

 

Congratulations Aimee on reaching your goal!!!!! :yahoo: So proud of you. :good: :hug:

There are many ways that you would be able to have a night out here & there & keep nursing. Just make up some bottles with either expressed breast milk or formula & send them along with him. And as you said, pump when you feel uncomfortable. Also, keep in mind the principle of supply & demand with nursing when making decisions on when and how often to pump. For example, if you stopped nursing Cooper at the same time every day & also stopped pumping at that time every day, you'd stop making milk for that time - which is fine, if it's what you mean to do, but it sucks when it happens by accident.

While it does happen, it's extremely rare for babies to self-wean before a year, or even two years, of age. It is however very common to have distracted nursers in the 2nd half of the first year. Here's some info from Kellymom that explains this a bit better.

If you're ready to wean now, just take it slow so that you don't have any issues with plugged ducts/mastitis (drop a feeding a week or so - or even slower if you want), or if you're just ready to nurse a little bit less, there's lots of combo options of nursing/bottles/sippies/formula/EBM that you can play with till you find something you're happy with, or if you just want to continue nursing, you can do that too! GL with your decision.

 

Sounds like a distraction phase to me! My son went through several of these between 7/8 months and about 13 months. He would be such a disaster to nurse that I started to consider weaning. Then I remember that nursing is not an all or nothing adventure. If he is too distractable to nurse and you feel like you're forcing him to the breast then take a break and don't nurse. I stopped beating myself up for the times that he didn't nurse, and so long as he was getting enough food and fluids (make sure he's having lots of water from a sippy) then don't worry about it and he'll likely come back around to wanting to nurse if you continue to offer sporadically.

Here's some info from KellyMom on self weaning and especially how rare it is in babies under a year.

http://www.kellymom.com/bf/weaning/babyselfwean.html

 

Thanks for the link! So much of what I read applies to Coop - he is all about kicking me and pulling at my jewelry while he nurses! Maybe I'll get one of those necklaces, I'd never seen that before. I don't want to completely wean him for sure. He doesn't regularly get a bottle and I've never tried a cup. I don't know that he would be okay with me giving him a bottle. He's only gotten one if I'm unavailable and that's only been a few times. I just really want need more time alone with my husband. I'm going to start sending him with my girls and hopefully I'll still be able to BF him. He doesn't even have teeth yet, he's my last infant. I'm gonna try to skip formula and nurse for the first year. New goal.

If anyone comes back to this thread, how does a sippy cup work with BF'ing? I could have sworn that the pedi told me at 6 months to start offering a sippy of water for my girls with their meals. But at his 6 month check-up his pedi didn't say anything about introducing a cup or any water or juice. So he's never had any. Do BF'ing babies start later with cups than formula fed babies?

 

:clapping: New goal!

I figured that you had a pretty busy house right now and there were lots of distractions.

I don't blame you for wanting time with your husband. I also think sending him out for a night now and then is a good way to get some time. We used to go out right after I nursed them down to bed... I knew I had a good 5 hours before they'd wake up hungry and usually that was enough time for me (I was tired! )

For sippies, I took the valve out of a starter cup. If you go to the cup isle in a Target they often times have info on the cup that says which age it's best for. I just picked one that was for young babies. We started around 5 months.

 

It works the exact same with breastfeeding. We gave the girls sippies with a bit of water in them every time they had solids, starting around 6.5 months. By about 10/11 months they were pros, so if I needed to be away from them for a nursing session they would get their breast milk/whole milk in a sippy rather than a bottle. :good:

 

My girls never drink from bottles. They are using a straw cup for water or, when I'm not at home, for milk. It really depends on you and Cooper when it's time to wean. Congrats on making it to seven months!

 

congrats on making it seven months! I LOVE that you now have a new goal!!! My initial goal was 1 yr, to avoid formula... but now I guess I'm holding out for self weaning... hmm... 3yrs 2 mo and counting! you mentioned not feeling full... I'm with you on that!! I actually ask the kids if they are getting milk, and they tell me yes. who knows!!! but for now we enjoy our 1 or 2 times a day.

I hate it when people ask when you are going to wean... like you should wean or something... It's a personal decision between you and your baby! enjoy your time! hopefully the necklace will help the distractions! I remember making sure I had a soft toy that the kids could hold and look at to help them.

 

My kids did the nubby straw cups to start too. We started around 8 months and by 10 months they had it down pat. Juice under 1 is not a requirement. If you do give juice, 4oz a day is plenty!

Oh and I just wanted to tell you pumping is not a good indicator of your milk supply. A well attached baby can ALWAYS take more than the pump can. Be sure to really massage your breast when you do pump to help with the emptying. Jane Morton has a great "hands on pumping" video if you google it. So even though you "feel" like you don't have much milk- look at the baby. You've got plenty! :0)

 

Drex has never liked bottles. I went back to work at 7 months and the daycare tried to give him bottles he didn't like that, so they tried a sippy cup and he would take that--both watered down juice and formula. If I'm home he won't drink formula, but when he's away from me he will happily drink it from a sippy.

Of course every body is different, but now that you supply is well established, you should be able to miss feeds here and there without it being too much of a problem.

 

I did it - I sent all 3 kids to my mom's house Saturday night. I nursed the baby around 3 pm before I left. Then that evening around 9 pm I pumped, just so I wouldn't be too full in the morning and I only got 4 ounces. I know you don't get as much when you pump but man I hope he's getting more than that per feeding. Anyway, I went to get him first thing Sunday morning and he was fine. He took two 8 ounce bottles while I was gone. It was so worth getting the time alone with DH! I'm going to start trying it every other weekend if my mom is willing.

 

If you can tolerate it, Id also encourage you to pump a little more. Does he still feed at night? How many times would he have nursed between 3-9pm?
If it were me, I would probably pump around 6 and then again at 10 before bed. Also, if you are trying to supress fertility be sure not to go longer then 5-6 hours at night without expressing.
You may find he wants to nurse more the day you pick him up- both because he's been separated from you and because the rate that milk produces will have slowed down since it wasn't being drained regularly.
Glad you got some quality time with your DH!

p.s.- 4oz is a GREAT amount for pumping, especially when you aren't an exclusive pumper!

 

I did this too. Good practice!

Mine neither! My goal originally was to make it to 6 months, then 1 yr and now 2 yrs.

I too have a chaotic house - 4 children 10, 5 & my 17 mth girls. T2 has been my distractable girl and has always had to have a resonably quiet area to feed in - hard at times in my house! She is quick to latch off if she's not in the mood and if it doesn't flow fast enough.
She has dropped one of her bf and seems to not always want much at the other times - not sure how I feel about that :cry:
Admittedly, they're probably not getting much, but its part of our routine and they are still keen.


It is ridiculous when people assume that you will wean after 6 or 12 months! Why would we, as twin moms, make more work for ourselves!??

I love seeing the look on peoples faces when they find out that I'm still breast feeding my 17mth twins.

 

i never saw a reason to wean before my little guy was ready, though i only could ever nurse one of them (the other has a high palate and i pumped for him for 18 months). it's up to you and your little guy..... i was so happy when one of mine finally latched (at 5 months) i never wanted to stop. though now, we are finally in the process, lol. i figured once he could unbotton a blouse it was time to stop.

best of luck!
jl