binky troubles

Hello ladies! it's been a while since I've posted. My b/g twins are 2.5 and we just got rid of their binkies. She is doing well, but my ds is still waking up every night crying for his binky. It has been almost two weeks and we are still having very sleepless nights! I am getting ready to do another round of ivf and cannot afford to be this worn out for the procedure. My question is, should I give him the binky back? We were only giving it for sleeping anyway. He is just not doing well without it, and I don't know how much more of this I can take! I don't want to confuse him by giving it back, and I am afraid if I do give it back it was a waste of two weeks of hard work and sleepless nights. I am not against giving it back to him for sleep at this point. I am just at a loss what to do. Any advice would be appreciated. I am sooo tired!
Thanks!

 

We haven't ventured down this road yet...I'm lookinforward to what others say.
Just wanted to wish you luck with your next IVF!!! That is very exciting!

 

I wouldn't give it back to him at this point. It's already been two weeks.

 

I would give it back. If after two weeks he is still unable to sleep then he obviously isn't adjusting.

I do appreciate that giving it back now is mixed messages, and I'm not normally in favour of going back on decisions, but I just don't think the misery both you and he are going through is worth it. I think if he was ready to sleep without it then the transition wouldn't be this hard.

Good luck with your upcoming ivf.

 

It's already been 2 weeks, so I don't think I'd give it back. Then those sleepless nights will have been for nothing. I think he will adjust sooner or later. I hope your IVF goes well!

 

I don't think I'd give it back either. But I guess it all depends how miserable the nights really are. Is he waking up every hour, or just having trouble falling asleep? How are you handling the wake-ups? Could he maybe be forming another habit by going in all the time, and maybe that's why he's waking (wanting to get you to come in) and not for the binky?

When he had the binky, would he sleep with it all night, or once it fell out did he leave it out?

Is there something else he's attached to or would really love to sleep with instead to help soothe him?

 

When he wakes up to cry, I do not go in there. I let him cio. Some nights he will only wake up 1-3 times and others it is every hour! He doesn't go down as easily now as he did when he had it.
When he did have the binky, he would sttn. When it fell out, he would sleep, but maybe wake up, whine then find it to put it back in, and all was well. Now, if he wakes up at night, he just cries. Some nights are much worse than others, but for the most part, it has been a very difficult transition for him. He does not have anything else that he is attached to. He has a night light and some stuffed animals and a blanket in his room. He goes to bed with the sound of rain on the Homedics sound machine..we've done that since birth. I am at my wits end trying to figure out what to do with this kid! He has always been a so so sleeper. I just really didn't think it would take this long and be this hard on him to get rid of the binky!

 

That's really tough, I might be tempted to give it back. I don't know what I'd do. If you give it more time without any improvement and you do decide to give it back, maybe in a couple months you can try a more gradual process for him getting rid of it on his own - like cutting the end off a little at a time? I don't know if there are any tips out there, or maybe your pediatrician has some advice. We went cold turkey too at the same time we transitioned to toddler beds. The whole experience was a nightmare!

 

I would not give it back. Good luck with the IVF!

I would not give it back. Good luck with the IVF!

 

This is hard situation. I would say not to give it back at this point, since the past 2 weeks would be a waste. At the same time, we all need sleep, so I totally understand the temptation to give it back. I would think sooner or later, he'd get the idea that the binky is not coming back and figure out a way to self-soothe. I would talk to the pedi and see what they say. Good luck with the binky withdrawals and your upcoming IVF!

 

Just wanted to add I don't think giving it back now makes the last two weeks a 'waste'. I think that calling it a waste implies either that he/you have been making progress (if he had started off waking up 3 or 4 times a night and was now only waking up once then giving the binky back would be a waste of that progress), or that if you give it back it will be just as bad when he gives it up in the future (putting you back at square one so you have to go through this again).

From what you posted there really has been no progress at all, he's still waking very upset multiple times a night. I also don't think you necessarily would have to go through this again if you gave the binky back to him and waited until he's older to take it away. My experience has been that when a child is ready to give the pacifier up then it will only take a few nights for them to adjust to sleeping without it (as you experienced with your daughter).

Good luck, I hope whatever you've decided to do you're all getting some more sleep now!

Edited to fix spelling

 

At this point, I would not give it back.

 

I don't think I'd give it back either. Is there something else you could try since he isn't attached to anything else? My boys have an Ookie that they chew on at night. Now they make teething ones too that are terry cloth. My boys will have these for as long as they want (since it's not hurting their teeth development). We have a rule that they can't leave their room with them and it was a great transition from the paci. Good luck with the next round and I hope you both are able to get some sleep asap!