OMG bad comment today

I went to Target with the girls today while DS was in preschool. Okay so I had my little list of things to do there and I got stopped no joke at least five times in one hour. But one of them just took the cake. Okay to set up the scene....I have my DSNG with the twins, a cart with DD2 riding in front, and then DD1 was pushing her cute little pink shopping cart. So we're over in the book section and DD is looking at some books on an end cap. I picked up a cookbook and this lady starts a conversation. I answered her question (about a book)and down a bit because I couldn't get wrapped up into another conversation with someone. Well then she notices the girls. No joke this is what she goes on to say......

"Wow! Are these all your children?" Yes. "WOW Oh my God. What were you thinking having so many kids?" WTF did you just say to me? Ok that's what I wish I would have said. I was in so much shock though that I couldn't even process anything in my head. All I muttered was "I love children and I love my kids." She said something about having one kid was enough and I said something like well everyone's different.

 

:shok: People just don't think before they talk! What an awkward conversation! She must have had a terrible experience with her one child.

 

:woah: thats all I can say :woah:

 

Wow, some people just don't think before they talk, do they? :hush: Maybe you should have done this::tomato: :laughing:

 

Or this :slap: sheesh!

 

I had a similar experience recently. I was shopping with just 1 twin and a man that I knew from when I was working asked about her and I said that she was 1 of 2 ie: twins. He then asked how many kids I had all together. I said 4.
He then kinda shook his head and said, "Oh well then." followed by something along the lines of, "You should have known better by now".
I was so gobsmacked and in shock, I didn't really reply.
The worst part? I was so angry at myself afterwards for not saying something more to him about how it's my family, I love my children, and yes thank you we are very blessed to have had twins.

So I can relate to not being able to respond appropriately to the comments others make. Honestly, it's often people from an era where manners were supposed to have been drummed into them. Do we go up to them and point out something we don't like!!?? :catfight:

Chin up! :grouphug:

 

OMG, that is so rude. It is sad our culture is all about the image of kids cost money and they are trouble for all. I once have someone told me at the mall told me that are you trying to have 20 kids like the Duggars? I told the for the record the Duggars only have 19 not 20 (yet) and that they are so blessed with so many wonderful children. In my opinion I admire the Duggars and they have so much love. We love our twins and I think sometimes people are just jealous. :grouphug:

 

I think we can all relate to this and agree that there are a lot of rude people out there. That is the one thing I was totally unprepared for was the amount of attention you get when you go out in public, even with my husband (we have an older DS too). The other day we went to McDonalds before the twins' 9 month check up and an older lady came up and said "twins"? (to which I would have like to say 'clearly' but refrained) and proceeded to say "oh my, I don't know whether to say congrats or I'm sorry"...I wish I was better at being mean as there were so many things I would have liked to say to her but I simple mustered a smile and walked away. Just once, I would like to go somewhere and not have to talk to anybody and not hear "wow, you have your hands full"!!!! Thanks for letting me vent too lol!

 

Oh WOW! Some people have broken 'filters' I think. I too have 4 kids total, 6 YO DD, 2 1/2YO DS, and 5 month twin sons. I hate how people can give you a look, or say things to make you almost feel ashamed at having 4 children!! DH has a great job and we are able to care for them all, thank you very much. Grrr....and I HATE the comment You have your hands full, don't cha?!! No REALLY?? Or the one, I don't know HOW you do it!

The worst for me was the comments my husbands grandmother would say to me, not in front of anyone of course (she had a set of twins that are 60 years old now) and she basically told me in no uncertain terms that I would not be able to care for my twins without hiring someone to help. Just because back in the day when she had her twins, she had around the clock care and help with the twins, for like, 4 months!

Or the other comment I would get when I was pregnant was, What are you going to DO? Ummm, well, I am gonna take care of my babies when they come! I will manage, as long as everyone is fed, clothed, gets sleep somehow, and has a roof over their heads we will be fine! My husband works an average of 80 hours per week, so he's not home much...we have managed well, even I am surprised some days. My house is a tornado, and theres always a ton of laundry, but we're happy and healthy so leave us alone! I almost hate taking the twins out in public with all the attention...sometimes it makes you feel special, but other days, I just want to go in, get what I need and get out!

 

So true.
Some days its great having the attention and instant conversation starter. But sometimes it would be great to just do what you need to do without the constant scruitiny.

 

I have gotten nothing but positive attention. At least I think. I am nearly 38 and the twins are my only children. When people say "bless you," I breezily take it as a compliment. I actually dig the attention I get from my girls. Normally I hate getting attention of any kind. I also work full-time, so I don't get out much with them, and it's always new to me.

 

What is WRONG with some people?! Geez. You handled yourself so well! She was jealous you made it look so effortless.

 

I usually don't mind the attention. I guess I would look and maybe stare too if I saw twins. Actually I probably do more so now and feel bad when the mother sees me staring. I feel like running up to her and saying,"It's okay. I'm one of you!" :laughing:

I did have a rude comment just this morning though. I was getting some fruit on the way home from taking my 2 eldest to school, and a man came over and had a look - just the usual. He asked if they were twins (duh, they were in my big double Valco and dressed very similar) and then said something like,"A bucket of cold water wouldv'e fixed that". OMG! :aggressive: What do you say to that! MAkes me wonder, does he think that they shouldve been 'taken care of?' Honestly.

 

some people! eh! make me so angry!!!!!!! i sometimes want to say just keep your mouth shut! to all these people that make these rude comments!! so sorry!

 

Looking back on that comment, I'm not sure whether he meant a bucket of cold water for dh before they were conceived or a bucket for the babies!!!!!!