Irrational fears

I bought the boys a stop light alarm for their bedroom, so when the light turns green-they can get up out of bed. Great, right? And it worked for a few days. Then all of a sudden, Nicholas would start with, "I don't want the light to turn green!" And he would proceed to scream, cry, whatever. He said he was scared. And of course Anthony WANTS the light on. I just don't understand. So at 6:30 am Anthony is turning the light on(to red, goes off at 7:30 to green), and Nicholas jumps out of bed and tries to shut it off. Fighting ensues, and well, you know how that all goes. So Nicholas gets his way and I chuck the thing out of the bedroom.

Now, I go to go turn on a timer for 30 minutes. The kids go play, and I will go and do some chores. When the timer goes off, I stop what I am doing and play with them. The tantrum right now is going to push me over the edge. In fact, I now have him upstairs in his bedroom throwing it because I was about to lose my sh!t with him.

Any ways to deal with this? I am at a loss. To me, it's totally silly. A timer. A clock. A light. What in the world gives?!? And it's him. Anthony has no issues with it. So it looks like Nicholas gets his way. Anthony screams and cries as well because he wants the light ON. I just don't know what to do!

Maybe put them on ebay?!? The kids-not the timer or clock!

 

When he calms down can you talk to him and ask him what he is afraid of? Maybe it makes a weird shadow or something on the wall and its freaking him out? :hug:

 

Ugh, Meaghan, I have gone through similar situations with L&L and I have yet to find anything that works. It is one of the hard things about having twins, invariably they are going to disagree about something like this, then how do you give in to one without cheating the other somehow?! I hope someone has some wisdom or experience with something that has worked for them in these situations, because I could use the advice too!

 

Take turns! One morning the clock is on, one morning the clock is off. That's what I have to do with the wall sconce. One night it's on for Royce, the next night it's off for Alice. And I make a big deal about it being so and so's turn and that's why the light is on/off.

Do you think he's actually scared or is he just feeling contrary about the light and his chosen word about the light is scared? Because Royce will say that he's scared of something (besides his whiny "I doooonwanna") when he really means that he doesn't like some part of it. Just like they both say, "I'm gonna puke" when they really mean that they're full at whatever meal (which, I admit I don't hear very much lately!)

 

Yeah, I've tried the taking turns thing-that hasn't worked. Maybe I should try it again. I tell ya, this green light thing was AMAZING. They didn't call for us until the light went off. We were in heaven!

I honestly don't think he's scared. What it is, I don't know. I do think that's just the choosen word. Hmmmm...Maybe if I put it where he can't see it, I don't know. I want to sit down and talk with them about it, but it ends up being a crying fest as soon as you mention the word...light...

 

Hah! That's how Royce is with the potty! He's "scared" of it and any time you even mention it, even to Alice, he starts getting panicky.

ETA: I realize that panic = scared, but it's not the "I'm scared of the dark" kind of scared, it's more of a "la-la-la I'm not listening" (or waa-waa-waa I'm not listening" sort of panic. Not panic, chaos. That's what I was looking for.

 

I have no advice but just sending :hug: and hoping you'll get a little :wine: tonight!

 

Ian will also do that when he doesn't want to do/eat something...last time I checked corn wasn't "scary" LOL!

 

I would try and give him different words for his feelings if possible, as it sounds like he is using the word "scared" when really he means something else?

Can you let him turn the light on at bedtime, or let him touch (and somewhere play with it), can you play with it with them - ie. who can make it green/red?, can you bring it down on the floor with you and play with it yourself - often if I start playing with something both kids are on me wanting to help within a minute!
Or perhaps give him a choice - do you want the light on this table or that one tonight? or do you want to turn it on now or right when we get into bed? Or do you want to help me put it up on the table or shelf once it turns green - basically anything to give him a choice about the situation.

Good luck - right now my DS is afraid of the noise that cars make, planes make, if DD screams, and any kind of person dressed up in a costume. And, if he gets scared and cries then DD starts up too. ugh!