When you get off schedule...

our 11 week old boys (1 month adjusted) are starting to sporadically stretch out their feedings at night. for example, they are on a 6-10-2 schedule (6 feedings a day) but last night we decided not to wake them up to feed at 10 and just see how long they would stay sleeping. this ended up being till 10:45 so they were fed then - lets call it 11pm. Then they slept through till 4am and were fed at that point. It is now 8am and both are sound asleep. thinking we need to wake them to get a feeding in now, but also wondering how we get back on our normal schedule? we usually get an hour off here and there and are able to get back on track after another two feedings or so. but now they are 2 hours off! is this a sign of them getting ready to skip/move a feeding at night? and should we try today to get them back towards our 6-10-2 schedule by evening?

 

That is about the age when our boys started changing their schedule, and at about 3.5 months, they stopped eating at night completely. I would not wake them - let them go for a day or two, and see if they won't settle into a new schedule. I know it is hard having no idea when they are going to eat, but that may be what you need to do for a bit to see what happens.

Are they breastfed or bottle fed? If they are bottle fed, I would suggest seeing if you can add a bit more to each bottle and you may be able to get them to drop to 5 feedings rather than six. At 3.5 months, we were feeding at 6-10-2-6-10 (we woke them for the 10pm feeding, which we did for awhile until we were able to drop that feeding entirely).

 

I found that mine would get off schedule (either one would double feed or they would sleep longer etc) and unless it was the middle of the night, I always would try to get them back on schedule. Mine didn't start to sleep longer during the night until 4+ months, and then if i saw the schedule change consistantly at night, i let their sleep pattern drive that schedule.

During the day, if they got off schedule, i would start to push them back onto schedule (either by feeding early or late if I could). Mine were really good at the every 3 hour feeding schedule - and they migrated back to the schedule on their own by the end of the day. (IE: regardless of the day - I would always try to have an 11 pm feed until they were about 4 months. That was always a good time to make sure they were back on schedule)

 

Schedule will always change, or flactuate all around. I never woke my kids up at night. We had a 10pm forcefeed until they were old enough to eat more solids and they did not need it anymore, but after that, I just let them sleep as long as they wanted. Sometimes it was 3,and sometimes it was 4. Just like Deyra though, I tried to make sure that during the day they were going to be again on a schedule.
I would not wake them in the morning. Let them sleep. They'll be up soon enough when they are hungry.

 

I agree that the schedules will change periodically over time. I too never woke the kids at night-I just let them sleep. In the beginning, we would wake the other when feeding one, but then realized that they were starting to sleep longer. So we stopped waking them and just waited to see how long they slept.

And like the others, I got them back on a schedule during the day-that way if I was up at night, for whatever reason, I was allowed some down time while they napped.

And I agree-let them sleep in the morning-and you as well!

 

THanks everyone! This is an exciting "transition time". Your thoughts confirmed what we have been doing.

Meaghan: what did you do then at night, when you just let the one who was still sleeping go to see how long they would sleep for? Obviously this meant you were possibly up twice as long or up at another time in the night. Sometimes we have done this and usually the other one who is sleeping wakes up within an hour of the one who woke up hungry first. It is just that then this makes for a loooong night!! And a bit weird to get back on schedule when one is off, but not impossible I know.

 

I always woke the second one to feed at night until I was confident that the other one would make it all the way through the night, if that makes sense. While they're still so small they probably need a night feeding, and you can anticipate that they'll both get up at some point in the night, you may as well make it easier on yourself and just wake both.

Later on when they didn't really need to feed at night, and were STTN some nights I would just feed whoever woke up, and sometimes the other twin would just make it all the way through the night. Some nights were long when they decided to get up within an hour of each other, but that was the exception more than the rule.

Schedules are wild.. just when you think you have it down pat, they change it up on you!

 

Yes, yes, yes, all of what she said we did it the same way and its so true! babies are so unpredictable no matter how good of a schedule you get them on

 

That what I'm scared of!

My 2 have their last feed around 7-8pm and I let them sleep till whenever the 1st wakes up. Lately it's been around 12-1am. I feed 1 1st then wake the other. Sometimes though, I get the sense that the2nd may sleep alot longer if she was allowed to but I'm scared to take that chane incase it throwsa out what routine we do have!! :shok:

 

This is like a puzzle, isnt it!!

I can understand both perspectives - to wake up and not to wake up (THAT is the question!! as Shakespeare would say in this situation).

Last night we did the waking up thing iwth Graham - Josiah was really hungry and "on" the schedule for a feeding at 2:30am, but G was SOUND asleep. My mom and hubby decided to wake him up to feed and he barely ate an ounce and then fell right asleep, while his brother Josiah gobbled down his whole 4 ouncer. Then, at 6:30, Graham was WAILING hungry and ready to eat and Josiah eventually woke up crying - we think because his wailing brother woke him - and only ate 1 ounce of his bottle before promptly falling asleep, while Graham ate his entire bottle this time.

Too bad they both weren't on the same pattern overnight!! :wacko:

 

When we did this, I believe was when one of us was in charge of Anthony, the other in charge of Nicholas. So if Nicholas woke for a feed at 3am, I got him. If Anthony woke for a feed at 4am, dh got him. And then we rotated it the following night. We seemed to change things up a lot around here! LOL!

 

I have this situation also. I have one twin that is capable of STTN and the other hasn't yet. That one wakes up to eat about 6-7 hours after bedtime at 8pm. The first twin stays asleep and the second one gets to eat. Then both twins wake up at 7am to eat breakfast.

My girls are almost 12 weeks. I figure that the one who can STTN is just ready to do so, and the other one isn't. The first one doesn't always STTN, but she's so close to doing so. I'm accommodating their differences and letting them develop at their own paces. They're going thru this transition now (sleeping in their bed at bedtime which is 8pm) but I expect their schedules to become regulated again soon. I'm just so excited that they do go in their crib at bedtime and go to sleep that I'll deal with the temporary dysfunction of having different schedules.

 

one part to your question... I always "started the day over" at 7am. and figured it was a fresh start to get them back on schedule... yes, the schedule does eventually shift as they get older, but we've tried to keep 7a as a start.

eventually you will be able to skip a feeding... its so hard to know whether to wake the 2nd baby or not... of course are you able to dreamfeed them? so that they aren't really waking up? you could dream feed the 2nd baby so that they will stay sleeping if the 1st one wakes.

good luck! you're doing great!