More sleep questions

I know there have been a lot of questions on sleep lately but I really need some help/ideas. Our 15 week old twins are not sleeping through the night but they sleep pretty well--down by 7, we do a dream feed, they still get up around 4 for another feed and then up at 7am. There is definitely some fussing during the night but it's nothing compared to what we are going through during the day.

For DS especially, there is hardly any napping. We are *trying* to create a schedule of one nap in the morning (around 9am), one in the early afternoon (sometime between 12-2) and then one late afternoon quick nap (around 4/4:30). The late afternoon one is no problem. The morning one is ok, usually just lasts about 45 min to 1 hour with some struggling to get down.

The early afternoon one basically never happens. DS will go down for about 30 minutes and then will scream uncontrollably. We then go in to soothe, replace pacis, etc. and that lasts for about an hour. At that point, I'm so frustrated and don't know what else to do that I just get him up. Then, of course, he's super overtired and gets really cranky at the end of the day. I should also add that we are doing swaddling/white noise/dark room, etc. and I always make sure they've eaten and diapers are changed. It's like he goes through that 30 minute cycle but then can't get over the hump to stay asleep. We've been working on this religiously for the past 3 weeks and I'm truly at the end of my rope. I don't know what else to do!

TIA!

 

the thing to keep in mind is that at your LOs age, sleep is just starting to consolidate - the morning nap usually starts to appear & become consistent around 4 months after baby's EDD. the afternoon nap usually shows up a couple of weeks later. the 3rd catnap usually hangs around for a couple of months & then drops off. are you putting him down 1 - 2 hours after waking? if not, it's likely he's too overtired to fall asleep or stay asleep on his own.

 

Nap times were a big struggle in our house for the first 6 months. Eventually, they did kind of put themselves on the 2-3-4 schedule...1st nap two hours after waking for the day, 2nd nap 3 hours after waking from the first and then their bedtime was close to 4 hours later. Me and the children had the hardest time with the 3rd nap of the day but once that schedule started to set itself, daytime was a lot easier around here.

 

Naps are really tough to figure out, and just when you do, they change their minds about what the schedule should look like. I would try putting them down just a little earlier than you have been and see what happens. Overtiredness was always the biggest challenge here.. by the time we got them down, they were too crabby to actually go down. You could read them a book or sing them a song in their crib for a few minutes and see how that goes.

 

Thanks--yes, we definitely put them down no longer than 2 hours after they get up. The sleep issues are something I've struggled with them since birth. Annie does a much better job, although she does fuss sometimes if she's gassy or whatever. But Harrison just *never* wants to go to sleep! At first, I didn't really get it and he was always really overtired. But then I figured out the 2 hour thing and it has helped. But, like I mentioned, he'll sleep for 30 minutes and then wake up, no matter what. I just don't know how to get him over the hump. When he does get up after 30 minutes and I go in, replace the paci, pat his back or rub his tummy, etc, he SO looks like he wants to go to sleep but the minute I walk away...screaming.
But it's good to know that we're still right at that time when sleep is consolidating. Maybe I'm expecting too much? But he needs to sleep and it's just not happening! We figured out yesterday that he only slept like 13 hours in a 24 hour period, despite the fact that I spent the majority of the day in a darkened nursery trying to get him down! I'm losing my mind...

 

have you tried shortening the awake period? putting him down after 1 - 1.5 hours, instead of 2? and maybe aiming for 4 naps a day rather than 3 for now?

 

Good idea. I will definitely try that. I'm not sure why I thought 3 naps was kind of the max but maybe I just need to be more flexible (I will admit to being some what schedule-defined and not so easy going!). I realize every kid is different so maybe I just need to make slightly different schedules for my two. Thanks so much for the advice! I hope it works...

 

it's definitely tough finding that balance between schedule & flexibility. i used to get really angry when my babies wouldn't follow my schedule. :blush: but we got it all sorted out eventually. you could always see if your daughter would go to his schedule - even if she doesn't need 4 naps a day she might go for it, and it's always so nice to keep them on a similar routine so you have some time for yourself. if not, it will likely only be an issue for a couple of weeks as i expect your son will be ready to settle to 3 naps soon enough. GL!

 

This sounds exactly like my Samuel. i could time it - 30 minutes. Whereas Luke always took good naps. I tried everything with Samuel. And then, around 6 months - through nothing that i did - he got the hang of it. So, IMO, it just takes time. Months of time, which is painful. But, Sam is now a pretty good sleeper and I would have never guessed it. I was afraid that he would be a 30-minute napper forever. But those first months, they are just learning. Again, just my opinion, but I would give yourself a break. if he wakes up after 30 mins, and he doesn't go back to sleep, get him up and try to go with it. It's tough - but like others have said, they change a lot.

 

I'm going through the same exact thing with my girls and actually just recently posted about it. I am frustrated as well, especially because I know they are tired but won't sleep. They wake up after a half hour to 45 mins, I can soothe them back, but as soon as I leave the room, screaming. I don't get it. We are doing 4 naps right now. They go down an hour after their morning bottle for about 45 mins, up for another half hour to 45 mins and nap for another half hour to 45 mins. Then they get the next bottle and we begin again. But I'm fortunate because they are sleeping from 6pm until 4am and I don't have to feed them at that time, just soothe back to sleep, and back up between 5:30 and 6:30. I just wish we could get decent naps so I can focus on school work when it school starts in about 2 weeks. I'm freaking out that I won't be able to do all my school work, but I've got my fingers crossed.