CIO hasn't worked...any suggestions?

Since the night of Easter when we put Gabby to sleep at 7pm (normal bedtime) she does fine until we leave the room....she screams, and cries and screams until we go in again and give her a hug and tell her to go to sleep.

She never did this -- now she won't stop. Any suggestions as to what to do? CIO hasn't worked yet -- we let her cry for over an hour last night until we went in and gave her a hug and put her down.

OH, and we also tried to put her down later -- 7:15 and 7:30 -- that didn't work either. Ughhh!

 

It sounds like she knows that you're going to go in and give her a hug no matter what. So if you really want to break this then I would do cio and not go in. I know it's soooo hard and so much easier said then done but I do think that would break her out of it. :hug:
I know you also said you tried putting her down later but have you tried earlier? I know it sounds wierd but it does work sometimes. GL!

 

I agree with Brigette, I would try either putting her to bed earlier and also not go in. It is so difficult to hear them wailing before bedtime :hug:

 

If a baby is having difficulty it may be a developmental phase that she's going thorugh that is causing her anxiety. to let her cry (beyond a wimper) could be messing with her brain wiring.

Most babies have anxieties at this age. seperation anxiety is still a big thing at this age. As with all things, this phase will pass and your daughter will go back to her old way.. but she may be teething her 2nd yr molars, she could be struggling with a new skill, etc. it's best to support her through it and not abandon her. We've supported our kids thorugh their phases and we don't ahve kids that need help going to sleep every night. but ew did support them when they needed it. when we fought them during a transition, the phase lasted longer than if we just embraced it.

maybe sleuthing to find out wha tmay be causing the issue will help you feel better about supporting her through this.

 

i agree with Brigette & Nancy that if you're going to do CIO, you can't go back in. it can take a lot longer than an hour of crying for a toddler to fall asleep. if that seems like too much to you, have you taken a look at Elizabeth Pantley's The No Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers & Preschoolers? i've heard good things about her approach.

also, if it's just a matter of leaving the room, going back in, giving another hug & then putting her back down, i'd say just do it. ardon: if it turns into something where you have to keep going back in for hours on end, you would maybe want to look into changing the routine, but if it's just a one time thing i don't see the harm. she may just want reassurance that you are still around even if she can't see you, KWIM?

 

I've had to do CIO a few times because of this. Just last month, as soon as I put my one son in his crib, he would start to have this quiet, whimper type cry. Tears rolling down his face and everything. When it first happened I was so sad for him and picked him up. Well, this went on for a few days before I figured out I was being played. He did not want me to leave the room and was giving me a guilt trip. He did it again when he would not come downstairs after his nap and that's when I knew for sure he was doing it to get attention.

If you can go back in there within a minute after putting them to bed, I don't see a probelm with it. But if it happens all night long, I would do CIO.

 

I was going to say... if all she wants is a hug... maybe just do it... the try to get the hug closer and closer to the time you leave initially?

my dd is crazy sometimes! I can't nurse them together at night anymore b/c she will leave... she wants her own time... so b/c she's fussy I nurse her first, then my ds, then she wants more time! ugh! so I'll go back 1 more time and count to 10 with her... and usually she's fine to go to sleep then. not sure if its a separation thing or what, but just getting one more snuggle time w/momma works... but when I leave her w/o doing this she will chatter and fuss for quite a while.

good luck!