i thought it got easier at 6 months?

this has been by far the hardest month of their little lives. the feeding problems are worse and to top it off i'm the only they will eat for. i have to get a feeding study done on them and am going to have to bite the bullet and get the dye study and endoscope.

we're also refusing naps too so momma gets no breaks. they scream during feeds and they scream through naps. yet they are happy when they are awake...i just need a break.

 

Hopefully your babies will get better soon.

:drown: Same here. Naps are all messed up as I think they are getting into their new schedule. Solids are still struggle and I am the only one who knows how and what to feed them and they seem to be constantly miserable from lack of sleep and need to be mobile without the full ability to do so.

I really counted days till 6 months but I really think it only gets harder yet more rewarding but harder. I now think first 2 years will be hard. Or maybe until they go to college and get married :crazy:

 

i posted a similar topic a few weeks ago...my girls were born a day after your boys so they are the same age, and i feel the same way...they barely nap unless i swaddle them tight...they get bored in their bouncy/swing/exersaucer/playmat after 10 minutes....they also arent sleeping through the night....ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

 

I am so sorry that you are going through that. My life really got easier when they were sitting up all my themselves. At 6 months, I had a solid routine down, but they would not eat any solids from anyone but me. It was a fight, but we got through it.

The routine really helped. They kind of knew what I expected of them and it worked well. I had to do full blown CIO too...

Keep plugging away,
Jenn

 

yeah we've put off the solids. i'm going to restart on the 23rd when their adjusted age is 6 months. feedings are like a military thing, you know? they are regimented and serious, not play time and fun. it's "ok, we have a job to do, let's eat". if you talk to them or distract them in anyway the entire feed gets ruined. i mean they are still happy babies, just not when they eat. i feel like i'm preventing them from development by holding their own bottles because i have to hold their arms away so they won't knock the bottle out of my hand or try and shove their fingers in their mouths to suck on rather than the nipple.

i hope we can just get these studies done and get a solution. they didn't want 5 bottles a day so we dropped it to 4, they didn't want 4 so we dropped it to 3, now they don't even want 3 but i have to get them to eat. i'm pretty much doing a dreamfeed 3x a day, when they are awake they won't eat. we they are asleep or dozing off they suck and get the job done.

it's very frustrating.

they can't really sit up by themselves yet, you have to prop them up and then they will hold it for a minute or two and fall to the side. they are rocking and getting close to crawling. when they are awake and it's playtime they are happy as can be and it's great to watch them and see them smile and laugh it's just the feedings that are horrifying.

 

If they are down to only eating 3 times a day then you need to step on it and get those studies done. My babies at nearly a year old were still taking 3 bottles a day, and those were full 8 oz bottles. They just recently let me take away the morning bottle and add in a full solids breakfast but they still drink a sippy cup of milk. 3 bottles a day at 6 months old is not enough IMO.

 

I can't help with the feeding issues, but for us it did get easier at 6 months. I think thats an approximation since they got easier when they were able to start getting places by themselves. Since they are crawling now, they are less bored and find new stuff to play with all of the time. And I guess I wouldn't say that this stage is "easier" than before. They have to be watched constantly and I can't set them down and expect them to stay there for more than 3 seconds. Its a lot more fun than before though. I would much rather be tired from chasing giggling babies all day than from staying up all night feeding newborns.

Just a question about your solid feeds: Do you feed them separately or at the same time? In the beginning, I had to feed them separately so they would focus and not get bored.

 

danibell, there's nothing i can do about the 3 bottles a day. they are 8oz bottles and usually i can get them to take it but not always. our new GI said 24oz was fine just to start pushing the solids. i think it's too little too that's why i fight so hard to get them to eat but i can't get them to eat more than that, believe me i've tried and it's just a bigger headache and loads more frustration for everyone. i wish so bad that they ate like normal babies, got up hungry, showed signs and signaled for food but they never have and i've never been able to understand. so i just offer up as much food and try and get them to eat as much as i can and right now it's 1 bottle every 5 hours from 5am to 6pm with 2-3 hours of playtime just before each meal so they work up an appetite - weird i know but it gets them to eat and if that's what i have to do to get nutritents in them i'm going to. and yes we are getting the study done. i'm in the process of trying to get it scheduled.

and when i do feed them solids it's 2 hours after their last bottle and 2 hour before their next bottle and i do it together. they've never had a problem with boredom, they've got eachother and that's all they've ever needed.

 

I can empathize with you on the feeding. While I in no way struggle as you do, feeding has been an issue for us too. We still use stage 1 nipples at almost ten mo. old. I still force ounces down. They still rarely finish a bottle with anyone but me. I do hope your studies will help!

It does get easier when they begin to sit up and crawl, but at the same time more time consuming. I was using this year's personal leave to take care of the twins, and also wite a novel. I was getting at least 2,000 words a day done up until 3 weeks ago when DD started crawling. Since then, I have written a whopping 2 pages.

It is much more fun, but a different set of obstacles.

 

In regards to formula intake:

I was told by my pedi (and read on some pediatric websites + babycenter) that once they eat ok solids, 18-24 oz of formula up till 1st year is all they need, assuming babies are gaining weight fine (not underweight) and are healthy ardon:

That's all I do, make sure they got 20 oz. If they refuse, I usually use that milk to make rice cereal and count it towards the daily total.

 

HUGE :hug: I know you are and have been struggling, I can't imagine the fights at each feed. I hope they can get the study scheduled ASAP so you guys can get some answers and be able to relax and know they are getting what they need. Honestly I don't know when it gets easier but I suspect that its more like 2 or 3 or 4 or 5............YIKES!!!!

My babes are the same....always bored!!!! They don't like anything for more than like 10 minutes, even their jumperoos. Mine can sleep from 9 to 5 before their first feed but I am up at least 15 times in between there to give my baby boy a suckie and I am sooo exhausted from all that broken sleep. That darn suckie will be the death of me!!!!!! :headbang:

 

suckie, meet thumb, thumb, throw suckie away! that's what my boys' did, found their fingers...yes it's a harder habbit to break (i was a thumb sucker until 11) but it's much easier on momma than a baby who can't reach for their own pie hole stopper upper.

 

24 oz a day sounds fine to me. As long as they are staying in a normal wt range, I'd say your doing great. I hope things straighten out and get better for you soon, they are super cute boys. Don't worry about the sitting thing yet. You said they're only now coming up on their adjusted age of 6 months. Sounds like they are meeting milestones fine.

 

Geez i wish i could, he can't get to his thumb cuz he's swaddled still...yup he won't sleep without that either ugh!!!!

 

We had a lot of feeding issues too... and what I found is that when it's SO hard in the beginning it will make some of the later months seem easier in comparison. Once you get the feeding sorted out and they become happier you will think it's a breeze (relatively speaking) . So hang in there!!! Oh and people are right, it does get a little easier when they can sit up which for us happened overnight right at 6.5 mos.

 

Keep your chin up! I know the feeling with feeding frustration although not to your level! My DS went through a phase where he wouldn't take any bottles during the day while I was gone at work and would nurse morning and night so I never knew how much he was getting. I ended up mixing formula or BM with all his cereal, giving him things like avocado to get extra fats, feeding him LOTS of yogurt. Now that 3 teeth are through he's back to eating normally. I'm sure there is a light at the end of the tunnel and if your boys are developing and gaining weight then you know you are doing the right thing and the fight is worth it....and don't worry about bottle holding, my 8 month olds still won't hold theirs!

 

I felt the same way at six months. And at three months. And still at nine months.

What helped me was a stranger in Starbucks who actually had TWO sets of twins...four years apart. He said..."Ya know, it never gets easier. THey may start sleeping through the night, and by then they are crawling all over and sticking things in light sockets. Having twins is hard. But it's also more rewarding. You have kids who share a unique bond. It's a beautiful thing to watch as they get older. Just go with it. It's hard."

I had no idea it was going to be this hard. And the only thing that makes it easier for me is if I say, yeah, this is hard. It's really hard. It's going to be hard for a long time....so I get in little treats when I can. A bath at 5am when they are still asleep. A nap when they nap...even if it's just ten minutes.

When I get on the floor and play with them, I try to do some restorative yoga. (If you are not familiar with restorative yoga, I highly suggest taking a class or getting a DVD....because twins are so hard on the body.) I just look for little windows of "easy" in between the hard.

Finally, after 9 months of feeding every three hours (yes...still) I am used to it. (My guys have reflux, so they only eat about 4 oz at a time still.)

It's hard, hard, hard. My pediatrician said that mothers of twins are made of steel. Even if we are crying on the inside.

Good luck and this forum is a life saver!!!

Ma

 

MaKettle - Thank you Great advice

 

thanks guys. in regards to their weight, they are in the 30th percentile and 17lbs-ish +/-. the problem is how much of that weight gain is with formula or with non nutritional rice cereal since i have to weigh it down so much for them to eat. that's where the concern from GI comes in.

i'm hoping to get this call today to schedule their 24 hour dye/swallow study and endoscope.

i know that once the feeds aren't so militant and frustrating life will get A LOT easier, especially when other people can feed them - right now they will only eat for me and that makes it SUPER hard to get a break when they are fussing the most.

we're also boycotting the morning naps now and by the time that last bottle of the evening comes around they are wailing at the top of their lungs because they are so tired. this is the 2nd week in a row i've not been able to get them to nap in the morning so it's one nap a day that's *hopefully* an hour long. oy!

they've reached the stage where if one cries they both cry and alex is far more emotional and won't stop crying unless his brother stops whereas river will most of the time sleep through it. for that last feed sometimes i have to let them CIO before i can even go in there and attempt to give them a bottle. otherwise i'm holding a bottle in the mouth of a screaming baby while the other one screams along. it's dolby dual digital surround sound baby and i only wanted that for the entertainment center, wasn't counting on it to be in the nursery too...lol

they are super duper happy when they are in playtime and can roll around and play with toys it's just feedings that they are nightmarish for.

i think they will crawl before they learn to sit up on their own. i mean they CAN do it, you just have to prop them up first they don't just get up and sit. my pediatrician said that's more of a 9month old milestone although i've seen and know TONS of kids that started sitting up at 6 months. did you guys use bumbos to teach them to do that? i've tried so many times to get them to sit but they are so spastic with their legs movements and only care about kicking things that bending at the knee is a HUGE challenge, almost as bad as feeding. we think they are going to be runners or swimmers. river is sooooo close to crawling, he's rocking, but lacks the upper body strength to push all the way up whereas alex has the strength he just hasn't coordinated his leg movements yet so he'll push up real high and lift everything up but drop down and start swimming and repeat. they roll like champs and river crawls on his back so their pretty mobile.

i'm just so terribly frustrated with their feeding issues. i hope to find an answer soon.

thanks for all the support, i'm glad i'm not alone in feeling this way...feeding issues aside.

 

i just got off the phone with the admissions office at the hospital. the tests are scheduled for next thursday. admit thursday morning with hopeful discharge the next day. it breaks my heart to put them through this :*(

 

It might be hard for a day or so to put them through the tests, but think of all the good days they will have after you have more information and more ways to help them through their issues. One thing you might try in the meantime is feeding them on their left sides. I know that sounds crazy, but one of our lactation consultants explained that the digestive tract flows to the left and that in some babies with reflux, holding them on their left side helps food flow down better. With my refluxer, this made a world of difference until we had the right combination of meds and he had healed enough to realize that eating didn't equal pain. My husband didn't believe it would make a difference at first. Then he kept wondering why I had an easier time feeding our refluxer than he did. Once he gave it a try and found a comfortable way to hold him, he became a believer as well. Good luck and I hope you are able to get some answers soon.

 

Mine are still drinking 4 bottles (7oz) a day at 14 months :headbang: plus 3 solid meals

 

My girls were also preemies, a little less than a week earlier than yours. They didn't sit at all until 7 months, and from there they took off crawling & standing up on things within a week of sitting on their own. They were doing exactly what yours are, the rocking back & forth. We did use bumbos sometimes, but not much. As for feeding, my girls are still always distracted, but I don't try to make it militant as you say. I let them look around and 'talk' to each other, and just bring the spoon to their lips & they usually open up for me and eat, unless they are just really full. IMO I think its way less stressful to just be relaxed with it (but we don't let them have toys or anything). I know your GI said to push the solids because they are not eating a lot of formula, but the 3 pedis we've seen told us solids are just for practice right now and really have no nutritional value yet. My girls were also only eating 24oz a day, and they are still growing on their curve enough. Mine also don't hold their bottles on their own, even at 9 months. Not because they can't, they do sometimes... but they feel better I think when we are cuddling them and feeding them. Starting sippy cups also helped them to hold their own bottles. I really hope everything gets a little easier for you, but I'm sure developmentally your kids are on track!!