Morning nap bliss!

For a while now I have not been able to get my 3 1/2 months old to sleep at all during the day. They are pretty good night sleepers and have been for a while, but getting them to stay asleep for more than 20-45 mins at a time during the day was next to impossible. As SOON as I put them down they were back up again....and that was assuming I could even get them to go to sleep in the first place. By the end of the day they were just completely worn out and very, very cranky.

For the past five days I have been following some of the suggestions in the No Cry Sleep Solution, the book that was recommended to me by people on this site, and we have been seeing good results in getting the boys to get to sleep and stay asleep for a short while without being continually held. The first few days took a lot of persistence, but I could see progress even within the first day. Our late afternoon naps were the first to improve, and they are continually getting better, but we were still a far cry from where we needed to be.

HOWEVER, as I write this note, they are BOTH asleep and have been asleep for almost 40 minutes now IN THE MORNING (they would never stay asleep for more than about 20 mins in the morning until today)!!! This is a huge success for us!

I am so excited!

 

:woo: for napping babies! Good work Momma!! :woo:

 

Oh that is wonderful news!!! I have my fingers crossed that this continues. What a wonderful holiday present from your babies!

 

So what techniques from that book are you using for their naps? Some mothers who don't have that book may find that information beneficial for them as well. I actually bought the book but had no time to read it so I loaned it to a coworker whose 9 month old baby still isn't STTN.

 

I would love to hear the techniques you have been using, my boys sleep for 15 mins in the morning in their crib. They take one long nap in their swing in the afternoon, I tried putting them in the crib the other day and only slept for 20mins versus 1.5 hrs, :headbang:

 

:woo: I remember it being so nice when they finally started taking longer naps! I hope it continues, and improves further!

 

Thanks!


Yes, as soon as I have a chance I will sit down and write out what worked for us. We are still tweaking things, but everyday gets better.

 

I should start by saying that my boys HATE naps. I mean hate them. They tend to be great night sleepers, but getting them to fall asleep during the day is so difficult. And once they do fall asleep, getting them to stay there is also very hard. I have been using some of the suggestions in the book to help them sleep longer during their naps and sleep somewhere besides in my arms or at the breast. So here are some of the suggestions that we got from the book that are working for us:

1. I think about two weeks ago I started keeping a sleep log to see if there were any pattens to their daytime sleep or lack thereof. There is a sample log in the book, but that one was a little too detailed for my tastes, so I just kept a log of observations about when the boys seemed tired, how long it took them to get to sleep, how I usually tried to get them to sleep, etc. This helped in a variety of ways. I learned that E is harder to get to sleep but will stay asleep longer. G is easy to get to sleep sometimes but won't stay there for more than 10 mins sometimes. So this helped me get a feel for who needed what kind of encouragement and helped me to see when they each reach those vulnerable periods of sleep where they are waking up.

2. I also noticed that whereas at night we do a lot of pre bedtime rituals, for their naps I had virtually no rituals or regular events to cue the boys into the idea that it was time for sleep. So I started using some. I picked a few songs to sing to them, sang these same songs everyday while trying to get them down.

3. The idea I liked best from the book is the tips for getting them to sleep some place other than your arms or at the breast. Basically you slowly teach them to get used to falling asleep in their bed rather than your arms. So, after I had them almost asleep I would lay them down. I knew they were going to wake right back up as soon as they were out of my arms,so as soon as they started to wake up or stir I would pick them back up, soothe them back to a drowsy state, and then lay them down again. Each time they started to fret I would pick them back up and start over. This takes a lot of patience, but it DOES work. The first day I had to pick them up like 6 times or something. By the 7th time I laid them down they finally drifted off to sleep. Each time I picked them up it took less time to get them super-drowsy again. The next day it was better, and the day after that was better too. We had a few setbacks, but one the whole I could see steady improvements. Now I only have to pick them up once after I lay them down and sometimes not at all. So it took about a week to get them used to being put down drowsy. I think in another few days I probably won't need to pick them up at all (I hope anyway!)

4. Once I had them to sleep I would stay in the room with them and watch for those times when each of them tended to wake up. Because I had been keeping a log I knew that for G it was around 10-20 mins after he laid down. For E it was more like 45. When they started to stir I would already be right there, put my hand on them, sing the songs they knew, etc. If they did wake all the way back up and start to cry, I would pick them up and repeat. After several days of this their naps are getting longer and they don't need me to soothe them back to sleep at each of those vulnerable waking periods. The songs especially seem to help. If I peak my head in and see they are getting restless sometimes I try just singing again and that works. If you don't want to sing you could play a cd or something.

I hope this helps.

 

Thank you for sharing those, I will definetly give a try. Your boys seem exactly like mine. They do great at night but daytime is a nightmare, especially for Matthew. Once again thank you.

 

Thanks for the details! I know its hard to find time to write lengthy posts such as yours, but it is greatly appreciated. We've been keeping a nap log for about a month now, but #3 sounds interesting. We always rock them to sleep, even for naps, while giving them a little 2 oz "snack bottle." And we always wait until they are totally out before trying to lay them down (because we hate it when they wake up and fuss!), but perhaps we'll try that method and lay them down while they are just really drowsy and then soothe them a few times when they wake up. I am occasionally successful soothing them back to sleep when they wake up upon being put in the crib, but when that doesn't work I usually give up too quickly and pick them up and then rock them for another 10 min or whatever it takes until they are totally out again.

 

No problem. Glad it was helpful. There are a lot of other good suggestions in the book, but those are the ones that really seemed to work for me. Like I say, we are still tweaking things each day to see what works best. The suggestions in the book are things that take time, but they do seem to really be working and what I like best about them is that they are really fluid and meant to be changed up with each family that uses them. I would highly recommend the book because I know I am not doing the techniques justice here. I read parts of the book a few times before we ever begin implementing any of the techniques because it took me a little thought to figure out which ones I thought might work for our problems. So, I would highly recommend the book. Also what I like about the book is how she describes the way babies sleep and the analogies she uses to help the reader understand the techniques. The one I liked best is how she describes what it must feel like to a baby who falls asleep in their mother's arms only later to wake up in a hard crib. She says it must feel a lot like if we went to bed in our cozy bed only later to wake up and find ourselves asleep on the hard kitchen table. lol. So, all the techniques are geared at getting them used to seeing their cribs as their comfortable place to sleep and learning that they can put themselves back to sleep rather than always needing someone to help them. There is also info in their for parents who co-sleep about teaching babies to sttn too.

Anyway--

Today when I was talking to my husband I was thinking of something else that I wanted to pass along. This afternoon I went out to eat with my cousins, so my husband was going to get then down for their naps. I explained to him what I had been doing once we got them down (the picking them back up if they wake/cry and putting them back down as many times as needed until they fell asleep), and I was telling him about how he needed to get prepared because it can be really frustrating to pick them up multiple times, soothe them back to a calm state (as I say my babies HATE naps, and as soon as they realize they are taking one they start to really cry), and put them down again. I knew since he was doing it for the first time this would be different than normal for them so he might have to pick them up and put them back down multiple times, so I found myself warning him how frustrating it can be and to just go into it knowing that you have to remain calm or else the technique won't work. My husband is SUPER calm, so he probably had no problem with it. But I am totally NOT a very patient person. The first day I tried it I was really mentally worn out after picking them up so many times and soothing them back to a calm state...only to put them back down and start the process over again.

So, the next day I went into their nap times reminding myself that YES it is frustrating, but it won't last forever, and I am gently teaching them to get used to something different and they are just frustrated and unsure what to do, and if I get frustrated too then I only make it worse on myself. I had to keep telling myself this over and over, and remind myself that all this time it was taking me to pick them up and put them back down over and over was time I was investing in my future (when they start to actually nap longer than a few mins at a time on a regular basis!!!) and their future (when they will actually learn to take naps and be happy babies throughout the day).

So, just know that the first couple of times you try it can be frustrating because you are basically just doing the same thing over and over and over again for what feels like forever. I know in the book it suggests that if you or the babies ever get really frustrated to just abort the mission and try again next time. I had to do this a few times the first two days just because I was mentally worn out. The overall idea is to gradually get them used to doing something which at first feels really foreign to them, so it's okay if you have to sometimes resort to doing what you normally do to get them to sleep. They are still getting slowly used to a new routine. So for me reminding myself that patience and calmness were really important helped me a lot. I just geared myself up before hand knowing that it was going to take time. I know I am learning a lot of patience trying to do this!! lol. Plus, "no cry" does not mean they won't cry (at least not for us). Mine wail and throw a fit as soon as I pick them up and get them ready for naps. The "no cry" part just means no 'cry it out.' When my boys throw one of their all-out-I-hate-nap fits, I just hold them until they calm down and then once calm put them down.....and repeat... etc.

Also, it can be really frustrating to sit in there and watch them while they sleep waiting for them to wake up during their vulnerable periods. But I kept telling myself it was a time investment---a lot of work up front, but a lot of rewards on the other end.

So, just a tip---get prepared to do pretty much nothing else during their nap times other then watch them and stay nearby (I kept a book with me to keep me occupied or folded some of their clean laundry) at least for the first few days.

This may sound weird, and I don't mean to equate babies with dogs, but I used to be really involved in dog training, and a lot of the techniques in the book remind me of positive rewards based dog training. Basically you are just repeating the same actions over and over and over again until the babies get used to those actions, associate sleep with those actions, and have positive associations with them. So it's like they are being sleep trained, but they don't really know it. It's a gradual change.

And we have a ways to go...but it is soooo much better than it was. At least now they are actually sleeping some.
And speaking of sleep...I better get some too since the boys are down! haha!

Anyway---just thought I would pass that along in case you are like me and not the world's most patient person. haha.

 

I LOVE our Summer Infant Best View video monitor for watching our boys while they sleep! In fact, I am "watching" them right now since I am "first responder" tonight (DH and I alternate who is the first to respond to the babies each night). Colin started stirring a little while ago and I could tell by his movements on the video monitor that he wasn't likely to settle down but would probably go into full blown cry mode soon, so I went in there and picked him up and cuddled with him for about 10 minutes. If only his brother would accept a nice cuddle instead of a bottle when he wakes in the middle of the night...

 

Unfortunatelly that is me :headbang: so thank you for the tips. Claudia is out of school for 2 weeks so it won't work with her in the house, but once she is back in school and its only me and the boys we will work on their naps, right now its the swings, thank God its working for now.