Smiling

Hello everyone!

I know that this has been discussed before, but I would like some input. We delivered our twins three weeks early at 37 weeks and had to spend a week in the hospital because our son developed pneumonia (he was delivered more than 24 hours after my water broke). Since then, both babies have been healthy.
Our daughter began smiling at around 4 weeks of age (although not consistently) and has been smiling non-stop for about two weeks now. Our son, on the other hand, is not smiling consistently at all. We *may* get what seems to be a smile out of him once a day (if that) but that is the extent of it at this point. When we told our pediatrician this on Tuesday, he said, "I must say, babies should be smiling between 4 - 6 weeks" which made me more scared than ever.

I've tried to do some research online, but that is only making me want to pull my hair out. Any experiences out there with this? Do we give him some more time to reach this milestone? Am I worrying for nothing? Is there cause to worry?

Any help would be very appreciated.

 

Six or seven weeks, I think, is average for them to start smiling. I wouldn't worry too much yet. If he is starting to smile at all, then I'm sure more smiles are coming. Babies all just reach their milestones when they are ready. I know it's hard not to compare the two, we all know we shouldn't do it but we all do it anyway, but when the worry starts, remind yourself they are two very different babies. Also, even once they start smiling, some babies smile way more & way easier than others. Just keep talking to him & smiling at him and those smiles will come! :hug:

 

If there is no social interaction (baby looking at you and reacting to your emotions) by 8 weeks after your due date, then it does raise a flag of something to watch. The most common reaction is the social smile, but if your son is not too much of a smiler but still gets excited and reacts to you talking to him then that is a good sign that the smiles are coming. My two were also born at 37 weeks and DS smiled first about 6 weeks but has been behind his sister in sleep milestones as well as holding head up, etc. DD didn't start smiling until 10 weeks or so and then wouldn't smile at anyone but me until about 12 weeks. At 16 weeks she finally started "talking" a lot which DS did much earlier. I think we tend to compare a lot more with twins and forget to correct for being born early when looking at milestones.

Even if it does raise a concern, the only thing you can do at this point is watch a little more closely for other milestones and be extra diligent about talking to your babies, exposing them to music, avoiding TV and as they get older if there are still speech/social delays getting them into an early intervention program ASAP.

 

Mine did not smile until closer to 10 weeks. It seemed like it took forever for them to learn some social interaction. At this point I wouldn't worry. There is a large range of "normal" in the first year. :hug:

 

My boys were earlier than yours but they didn't smile until 3 months. My experience in the first year is that girls tend to do things before boys. Two of my friends I hang out with most had their daughters a month and 2.5 months after my boys. Their girls did EVERYTHING before the boys. It is so hard not to compare, but the less you do it, the more sane you will be! :lol:

 

Thank you so much for your replies. It's very difficult not to compare...especially when friends and family keep expecting the same thing from both babies. I hate this worry.

 

I know for a fact that we didn't get the first *real* big smile from Kevan until he was 12 weeks old. (I remember this because he had surgery at 11 weeks, and was in the hospital for several days -- and he really started smiling after he came home.)

I should mention that he does have some oral motor delays, was never able to latch to nurse, etc. That could be the reason he smiled somewhat late -- or, it could just be his personality. He's never been one to do what all the other kids are doing, LOL.

I wouldn't worry just yet!

 

I think that is early! Especially for consistent smiles. I wouldn't worry yet. :hug: