Upset!

I had my weekly Dr. appointment today and we discussed the procedures of L&D at our hospital and how many people were allowed in the room etc. I told my Dr. that immediately after the girls were born I only wanted to have my husband and 11 year old DD in the room for a while. She said she understood but because of the swine flu that both of our hospitals in town were implementing a new rule that no one under the age of 18 would be allowed In L&D for any reason. So that means my DD can't meet her sisters when they are born. I feel so sad for her. How fair is it that any adult can meet them but she can't? I understand but I'm completely upset!

 

I understand that you want to try to control an unpredictable situation (labor) by as much as you can and I also understand how frustrating it is not to be allowed even the little bit that you're asking for....especially when you can't even get mad at the hospital since they have a legitimate reason for denying your request. However, can she come once you're on the postpartum floor? That should only be a max of 4 hours.
I also completely agree about keeping the amount of people with you in the beginning to as few as possible!
Good luck, you're almost there!
I'm just starting.

 

:hug: Even understanding, it's sad. I'm sorry for your 11 year old.

 

That is kinda of messed up. I know if my girls had an older sibling they would have been allowed in the NICU don't see how L&D is any different. :hug:

 

Sorry! Same here, we have hospitals here not even allowing husbands in the OR for the c/s due to swine flu! Feel the pain!

 

OMG!! I would have been a fruit loop without dh in the OR! and I think it is sad that your dd cannot be in the room! I understand too but it is very disappointing!

 

im sorry that sucks. i know it was 18 years ago but when we were born 16 weeks premmie and were in NICU for 6 months or so. our older sister and older brother (14 and 7 at the time) werent even allowed into see us at all. Out of the whole time we were in hospital they saw us a total of TWO times and that was only cause one nurse let them sneak in for a mintue or two when the "big bosses" werent in there. It sucks

 

I understand the hospital's rationale but I am sorry that your DD cannot be in the OR :hug:

 

:hug: I'm sorry about that, even if it is understandable, you are allowed to be sad about it. :hug:'s for your dd.

 

:hug: I'm sorry, that is hard. I hear hospitals around here are doing the same thing, but not letting kids visit. It's sad. I'm sorry your DD won't be able to meet her sisters right after they are born. :hug:

 

We are in the same boat - and I'm already devastated about it.

And we don't have a post-partum floor / wing - you are in the same room the entire time, on the L&D floor. I'm truly worried that if these two twins wind up in the NICU, that DS won't meet his brothers until they are days / weeks old.... that really, REALLY, upsets me.

I get the rules are for a reason - but I also have to say there's GOT to be exceptions somewhere.

ETA: I'm looking at a possible delivery at Christmas time - add that whammy to the occasion.

 

Why can't she go in if she wears a gown and mask? They have new flu policies at our hospital, but as long as they have no symptoms, and wear a gown and mask, they are allowed to visit. Then again, most people wouldn't be stupid enough to bring their sick child to visit new babies.

 

Very sorry. A lot of hospitals are doing this now. Newborns are extremely high risk and they don't want to increase any possible risk of infection. Women who are pregnant are the second highest risk, so it makes sense that they want to keep young children (who are more likely to carry germs) away from L/D or maternity floors.

I have a young son myself, so while I'm not happy with the rules, I know they are there for my protection and I would hate to know he was the cause of someone's illness or death.

 

That's so frustrating. Obviously, the rules are well-intentioned, but at age 11 she is old enough to follow the same precautions an adult would. When I delivered in February 2008, the hospital had a policy that any siblings (I think under 14) had to have proof of flu vaccine to visit. Of course, that was before swine flu, and of course there are now vaccine shortages. I'm sorry your DD won't be able to be there!

 

:hug: I would definitely be upset too! :hug:

 

The biggest reason hospitals are doing this with children, is because it takes them much longer to exhibit actual symptoms of the flu. So they could be carriers with no symptoms, and they want to avoid that possibility.

 

Actually, there is no proven fact that children are more likely to harbor germs than adults. That rule is very old school, and has yet to be changed. Children tend to harbor fewer germs (if there is a difference) because they have parents who make sure they wash their hands, brush their teeth, etc. As for the person that said children take longer to exhibit symptoms, that is mainly untrue. There are some exceptions, but children usually get fevers hours/days before an adult exposed at the same time. Their bodies are smaller, so they begin to fight the foreign contaminant sooner.
Hospitals tend to be very old school, and slow to change policies. Some people get lucky to have a modern philosophized hospital, but most don't. With the "no one under 18" policy, it basically a blanket comfort strategy to make everyone feel better and safer, in a situation/world, that is unpredictable.

 

I know how you feel. My son was not able to see his brothers until they came home 67 and 74 days later. It is a little different because my son was only 2 1/2 but it still saddened me and he didn't understand why he couldn't see his brothers. I hope that your daughter wont have to wait to long to see them. I videotaped the boys and showed the tape to my son which he really liked. Best of luck

 

Most hospitals are doing this right now and not allowing any visitors anywhere in the hospital under 18yrs old. My friend just had a baby and her dd was not allowed to meet her little sister till she came home from the hospital. I know how much that must suck but if I had a baby or knew someone who was in the hospital I would be happy that rule was regulated. Trying to keep the sick from getting sicker.
I understand why they don't want the young ones there...how many adults will put their fingers in their mouths then all over furniture? Kids don't think about those things like adults...I caught my 4 yr old licking the shopping cart the other day and thought I was going to die.
Good luck with your delivery! I am so sorry your dd won't be there!!!

 

Can you ask about bringing in proof that she had the h1n1 shot (if you are going to have her get it)??

 

Our hospitals are screening people who are in the waiting areas now to protect their patients. If you have a cough, you are asked to leave. I can understand why this would bother you because if the child isn't sick, why is she different from an adult. Maybe keep bringing it up to your doc and see if as the season moves on, if they are willing to let her in. Our hospitals are also only allowing two people in the room but for us but we only want eachother there. This is definately a different season to have a baby in.

 

I can kind of understand their reasoning but I think it is sad, I'm sorry for you and your DD. I wonder if it would be different if you could prove she had the vaccine?
I am going to have to ask about this at my next appointment, wonder if my hospital will be doing the same. I sure as heck hope not because with my twins I was sent to Seattle to deliver and my DD didn't get to meet her sisters until they were 3 weeks old. I was really looking forward to my girls coming to the hospital to meet their new brother and had it all planned out with gifts for them and all. I would be really sad if that was not allowed to happen so I really feel for you and your DD.

 

When my twins were born back in April I had wanted that special time for my older (6 year old) son as well. In the end I had an emergency c-section and the babies spent 8-9 days in the NICU. Due to RSV season my son was not allowed in the NICU. We were all crushed that he couldn't meet his brother and sister.

In the end I still let him take a couple days off school to "hang out" with us in my post partum room. We went to the NICU while grandma took him down for ice cream. We didn't tell him when the twins were coming home and let it be a surprise. I have pictures that I will cherish forever of his expressions when first seeing them. There was actually something more intimate about that first meeting happening at home.