Am I doing this right?

The twins will be a month on Monday (wow!). Right now they are eating 4 ozs. every 3-4 hours. (seems more like 3 the past 2-3 days) When one wakes up to eat, we wake the other up to eat. Is this what you did at this age? Should we let the sleeping baby sleep? Last night went so poorly (Nathan up screaming from 7-10, got him to sleep, Maddie woke up to eat, fed them both, then I couldn't get Maddie down... and repeat) I feel like I'm not doing anything right. (and not getting any sleep as well)

I know everyone's different, and I am going to talk to the pedi. on Thursday for suggestions, but wanted to know from experianced moms what you did.

Thanks!!!

 

We did exactly as you are describing. If one woke up to eat then we woke the other one. The first few months are very difficult, there is a lot of sleep deprivation! Hang in there, it gets easier.

 

I know, tough times. We always woke the other to eat. I don't know if it was right or not. I never got sleep. I was too afraid to not wake them to eat in fear they would just wake up as soon as I fell asleep.

 

My motto is as long as things are working for you and the babes then you can't go wrong. My boys are 9 months old now and I still feed them at the same time. I tried letting them sleep and feeding them on true demand but this is to exhausting it only made my days and nights unbearable. I know it works for some but not for us. I also used my family and friends for support. For two months after my boys came home from NICU they screamed non stop and took an hour each to bottle an ounce(they were terrible feeders. I would have family and friends come in shifts, especially in the evening. I would then go to bed sometimes as early as 6:30pm and get a good couple of hours in while others watched my kids. I found this very helpfull. At first I thought that I had to be their to feed my kids at all times and sometimes felt guilty that someone else was doing it. If you have these feeling I can say from experience to let them go. It is the best thing you can do for yourself and your sanity. I hope things get better for you guys soon. I would love to share more experiences with you if you have any other questions.

 

I always woke the other when one got up to eat. I just felt like keeping them on the same schedule was important for me. It is definitely hard at that age, but you are not doing anything wrong! :hug:

 

I did the same thing. They got into the habit after a while of just waking themselves up when the heard the other one awake. They still eat at the same time and are on the same schedule.

 

I woke them to eat at the same time at that age too! We also had huge screaming fits from about 6weeks to 8 weeks from 7-9 EVERY night. There was nothing wrong with them and 9 times out of 10, I was crying right along with them. The good news is that it's just a phase and one that will hopefully be over quickly for you! Hang in there, it sounds like you are doing a great job! :good:

 

I'll post my response only because it is different from what everyone else was doing. My sons were very slow eaters - usually an hour per bottle, and I pumped exclusively. We let our boys sleep until they woke to eat. Usually one woke on his own shortly after his brother was done eating. The other thing my DH and I did was take shifts. I think this is the only thing that got either of us through those early months. I would go to bed very early 7:00 or 7:30 and sleep until 2:00am or 2:30am (only do this is you have a well established milk supply at this point) and then I would get up and my DH would go to sleep. I was able to get 6 or so straight hours of sleep before my shift started. I was then up from 2:00 or 2:30 until bed that night. The only "rule" we had was that if both babies woke at the same time and either my DH or I needed help we would wake the sleeping party to assist. This system worked for us. My sons were terrible sleepers and once we got one of them to sleep we definately did not want to wake him!

 

I always, always, kept them on the same feeding schedule, which was every 3 hours during the day, until they were 8 months old! You are doing great mom!

 

This is what we do, and they are have also been having the screaming fits from 7-9 also. Makes for a long evening.

 

yup, what Aimee said!

I know it's hard right now. Hang in there. they need some time ( a few months usually) to settle into a schedule.

 

thank you thank you thank you! everyone for replying. I was so upset on Saturday, feeling like a failure as a mom. (I tend to be really hard on myself) Last night went better, I know we'll have good nights and bad for the next couple of months.

I'm glad we're on the right track waking the other to eat. I feel better knowing that others did the same thing and had similar experiances. Your kind words help, too. I have been struggling this month with trying so hard to be "perfect". I am trying to let "perfect" go and just relax- not easy for me!!

Thanks again!!!!!!

 

Another one who woke both to eat at the same time (or within 15 mins of each other). The first 6 weeks are strictly about survival. There's no "perfection", just "surviving"! :hug: Hang in there momma, it will get better as you figure them out, they'll figure you out, and everything will fall into a routine!

 

you're doing a great job... the first month and a bit is really hard. evenings were just fussy.

YES, we woke the other twin when one woke and fed both. I followed 2 main books for what we did. Happiest Baby on the Block - it suggests Swaddling, Sushing (white noise), Sucking - Pacifiers, sideline position and swinging ... something about 5 S's. sometimes you can do all 5 S's to get them to settle down.

I'm a BIG swaddler... it worked for us. We had quit after about 1-2 wks because they kept coming out. Well, we started again at 5 wks and soon the babies started skipping their night time feedings... sleeping right through... by 8 wks they were sleeping 8 hours at night. Wrap them up tight - just not tight on the legs. Keep their arms in as much as you can. I kept modifying their blankets and wrapping them up until 6 months!

The 2nd thing I followed was The Baby Whisperer... she has a very reasonable take on things. EASY is her accronym for her schedule/routine. Eat, Activity, Sleep and you get You time while they sleep. the important thing I got was to Eat first then activity (not much when they are small), and then Sleep... mine (during the day) didn't cry for food... b/c we fed them when they woke up. I also fed them more often during the day so that I could get their 8 or so feedings in during the day... I fed every 2 - 2.5 hrs it seemed until over 3 months old... but we got over 8 to 10 hrs of sleep after 2 months at night... so the babies needed the extra feeding or so during the day...

hope that helps... sorry so long.