Can't go out in public w/ my 2!

Just realized I've got "those" kids when we go someplace. Unless they are in their stroller, if we run in someplace for a quick errand it is just rediculous. They look at each other, start laughing and think it is acceptable to run around like crazy and pull stuff off the shelves. They used to hold my hand and wait with my nicely. Where did they get the idea this was okay? Thought it just happened at the library, but it's anywhere now. I am so embarassed. I used to be a teacher, I explain my expectations so they understand. It is seriously like they don't hear a word I say anymore. They are just into each other and being silly. Our friends who have singletons at this age don't have this problem. They totally feed off of each other! I can pick one up, but the other just keeps trying to make him laugh.

Is it just the age and should I avoid situations where this would happen? Or leave, have a time out and try again? My constant dilemma!

 

:hug: I am sorry. I truly believe it is the age and the fact that they are both boys. I have had my fair share and then some of having "those" kids, too. Just yesterday I let them walk in Walmart (something that rarely happens, and now I remember why :blush...and I have to go back to being the extra strict mom again. At least they don't test me where it's important anymore...like parking lots and that kind of dangerous situation.

 

DH & I let ours walk in Walmart about a month ago. We were both there (so I didn't think it was a big deal) we could each handle one. WRONG MOVE! Now, I have trouble with them wanting to get into the basket when I go by myself. If I do actually get them in the basket, it is not long before they are trying to climb out.

I have noticed that DD will stay close to me. DS on the other hand will take off as fast as he can the minute I let go of his hand. He has that type of personality....if you give him an inch he will take a mile. I have learned that I cannot let go of them for a second in public. Not even to reach up and open a door. If I let go of a hand, it has to be DD's.

For the most part, I don't go anywhere alone unless I can take the stroller or there is a basket I can put them in. It is hard enough to go shopping with them by myself. I don't need them running in opposite directions.

You are definately not the only one that has "those" type of kids. :hug: I think with time...the older they get, it will get better. Hang in there!!

 

This is us too. DH lets them walk wherever we go and then when I am by myself, I have such a struggle keeping them under control. DH says I am too strict with them in the store, but I don't want them running around like crazy kids. I am hoping it is a phase and they will return to being well behaved kids in public!

 

If it were me I would either;
1. Take the stroller (even on really short trips), start out letting them walk but explain that if they don't stay close to you and listen they will have to sit in the stroller. Follow through. They should soon cotton on that you're not kidding and if they want to walk they'd better do it nicely. (This is like a time out for them without being a time out for you, you can still get/do what you need to).
or
2. Get some safety harnesses. While they won't prevent them from reaching the shelves it will stop all the crazy running around and let you focus more on the shopping.

I hope it's only a short phase!

 

I agree, I think it is a stage. Well I hope so anyway. Because of this, mine are always in the stroller or in the buggy. :hug:

 

Yeah, I let mine ride in the shopping cart at Walmart a few weeks ago- one in the seat and one in the basket. We'll not be doing that again ANY TIME SOON. Bryan tossed a HUGE jar of pickles out of the cart and it shattered everywhere! I just wanted to hide! :escape: I was so embarrassed. So it's back to the stroller for us. Such a pain, but I can't do all my shopping at HEB or Costco. Just wish everywhere had double seated carts!

Though a girlfriend of mine made a comment that has stuck with me recently-- we were talking about discipline and I said that the boys will respond roughly about 50% of the time to a threat. She said, "that means you've made good on the threat often enough to make it real." So that's encouraged me to be more consistant about following through on the threats and even going straight to the punishment without a warning first (on particularly bad offenses) to try to get it through their little heads that I mean business. Hopefully that will help minimize the psycho rotten misbehaviour in the future! (but maybe I'm dreaming! )

Hang in there though-- I think all kids are "those kids" at some point or another, much to the chagrin of every mother!

 

Mine are 'those' kids also. As they get older, different things will cause them to act up. We went to the bookstore yesterday and they were pretty good, we read some stories, and had to put back quite a few books.. but at the supermarket later with my Dad and the twins, Maya would scream when we said we wouldn't get her this or that. My dad gets mortified, but I usually don't care, just stick to my decision (maybe give a bit, but not completely), and move on.. They won't be doing it when they are going to high school.(hopefully!)

 

Mine get worse if they are not taken out once a week. It's like they forget how to act. I'm a big believer in divide and conquer. Mom takes one and I take the other and they stay in the basket

 

:hug: We are in this stage, too. Mine HATE riding in carts. It's not exactly a blast to bring the stroller everywhere but that's the only way they even kind of behave. The more I let them exercise their legs by holding hands when there are 2 parents available for them to do so, the more resistant they become to cooperating with any sort of confinement. I dread Zoo weather (in a month or so) because I think it will be an utter nightmare taking them - there is no way to confine them other than the stroller (where they can't really see much!).

I feel like I am the only mom with "those kids" everywhere I go... but then I know my kids are mostly really good kids, so I am sure there must be others going through similar experiences. Glad to hear I am not alone!

I agree that following through 100% of the time helps them to behave. I have taken to giving TO's in the store. Today, all 4 of us were at a sporting goods store and were letting the boys walk, holding our hands. Jacob kept trying to run off, so I sat him on the floor near a rack (yeah, it's a bit dirty... but they're toddlers - it comes with the territory!) and had him do a TO for about 30 seconds, with me standing right next to him but not making eye contact with him. That's all it took to get him into "good behavior mode" and there was no looking back! :good: Maybe you could try something like that?

GL!!

 

I think it really is part of this age. We still took the stroller at that age (or wagon to the zoo) They would either get to walk until they acted out and then they would have to sit or one would sit and the other would walk (taking turns) It is easier to manage one roaming little one than two that are egging each other on.

But stay firm with your guidelines, they do get it they are just testing you. Oh we still do TO in public if warranted. Good luck, we all feel that way at some point. We also did snacks at this time sometimes too. Bag of crackers or such. Yes they sometimes dropped snacks but their hands were busy!

I imagine your friends w/singletons do have similar fights, you just may not see it, mine have always been fabulous when other people are around. Also, a familiar saying, it is different with two and not just twins. If you get two kids this age together, that are friends/comfortable with each other they are going to play and egg each other on.

 

I am having the same issues, my boys are about 2.5. I do think it has to do with their age, their gender, there being 2 of them and one of you, etc. My daughter was never that difficult to take out at this age, although for her, 3 was much more challenging.